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You took a step. As they say, it takes a first step to get anywhere. Your credit is certainly challenged now and it will take a while to reach your goals. However, remember that every day and every time you use your card/s, and make payments, you are making major strides toward your goal. (don't obsess) As Fico says, your score is a snapshot of your credit for just that moment, so each moment you move forward without new negative activity, you are building your new credit.
You are not pathetic, you are inspirational.
Much good luck, it will all be faster than you think,
CI
I got the Amex Pass for my 13 year old daughter. It does not report to the CB because it's a pre-paid card.
I funded thru my AMEX and she loves it, she feels like an adult, lol.