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Kohls

Valued Contributor

Re: Kohls

PS - Yes, he does have legal custody.  She's still receiving child support because she and her ever changing attorney keep getting postponements for the child support review.  She's also claimed bankruptcy, so she needs money to feed the kid when the kid is with her.  Again, not fair.  Again, his battle, not mine.
Moderator Emerita

Re: Kohls

Well, it does sound like you've managed to draw a line as to where you can help, without being drawn into the craziness --good job!

I hope he can dig out of some of this. Obviously, the ex and her stable of attorneys regard him as a goose ripe for the plucking. Smiley Sad With luck, he'll one day decide that he doesn't wish to be plucked any more, and start responding proactively to some of this crap.
* Credit is a wonderful servant, but a terrible master. * Who's the boss --you or your credit?
FICO's: EQ 781 - TU 793 - EX 779 (from PSECU) - Done credit hunting; having fun with credit gardening. - EQ 590 on 5/14/2007
Valued Contributor

Re: Kohls

Sadly, she is easily set for life over his service to our country.  He will have to work until he dies.

 

He doesn't mock me for my choices (pay bills first, then if there is leftover money, go out to eat, or see a movie) but he gets very defensive very easily.  The super sad part was he was clearing more money than me each month.  He immediately jumped on my case for CHOOSING to be poor and CHOOSING to pay bills instead of having fun money!

 

Dear Brother,

 

When I retire, I should not have to work at all.  I will not have any debt.  I will own a house, free and clear.  I will own a vehicle, free and clear.  And I will have money in the bank.  The biggest part is that even with this recession and my income severely reduced and my income opportunities more limited than before, I *am* still on a cash basis.  I am still making it each month.

 

And yes, I will still feed you when you stop by for a visit.  As always.

 

How you can not make it on almost 4k a month (this is after taxes), I shake my head in amazement.  Now, I know it's been reduced to 2k a month.  But still, you should be able to live off of that!

 

Why do you choose to live in (rent) a house that costs $1800 for rent, $300 in utilities, when you could be living in a brother in law apartment for $700 a month, including food, utilities, and internet?  Add $100 to rent if you want cable.   And if you asked, you could be added to my cell phone plan for $15 a month instead of paying $60 a month?  Up the rent to $1500 and I could get you out of debt within a year or so.  Or -- well, I could go on, but seriously, you could live so much more affordably, if you choose too.

 

You have to leave the drama and the ex at the door -- neither are welcome or will be tolerated here. 

 

You always be family...and I love you dearly.  

 

This is your journey.  Be safe. 

 

Love Lil Sis 

Highlighted
Moderator Emerita

Re: Kohls

Very well put! And I'd guess that he gets defensive because he knows that yours is the way to go, but he just can't make himself do it.

It's like Aesop's The Ant and the Grasshopper.
* Credit is a wonderful servant, but a terrible master. * Who's the boss --you or your credit?
FICO's: EQ 781 - TU 793 - EX 779 (from PSECU) - Done credit hunting; having fun with credit gardening. - EQ 590 on 5/14/2007