I've done similar with my mother. Never gave her the card, but she's been lucky enough to have her own so she wouldn't need my cards. Made some horrible decisions recently as to not pay some medical bills, but that's another learning lesson for her. Only can do what you can do.
Best of luck! If you want to do the AU for her, it would be a great thing. Do you have BofA? I think they report the whole line as in when the account was opened for the AU. Or at least that was my experience with my mom.
Best of luck! If you want to do the AU for her, it would be a great thing. Do you have BofA? I think they report the whole line as in when the account was opened for the AU. Or at least that was my experience with my mom.
That's kind of you to want to help your mother. But finances is one of those things where the person has to help themself as well as let others help him or her. I actually think it's better if you got her permission or talk to her about it before adding her as an authorized user. Even if it's a good deed, clandestine actions are just...not quite right. Tell her that she doesn't even have to do anything, just let you put her name on file and don't send a card out to her. That way all the good can be benefited by both parties. Just explain it in a simple way and I'm sure she'll be agreeable to it.
@BluePoodle wrote:
@PandiferBear wrote:
@BluePoodle wrote:
@PandiferBear wrote:Okay, so my credit is not perfect, but it is alright - my current TU FICO is 684. It is getting better all the time, and late next year, it will be very good. My mother, on the other hand, has very poor credit (lower 500s with baddies in the double digits), and I think she always has. I would like to help her with this and have helped her start looking at things - she was afraid to for a long time and still is to a certain extent. I remember that feeling, so I empathize, but you kind of have to buckle up at some point. There is only so much I can do with her, since she lives on the other side of the country, and we really do not get to see each other often. I am considering adding her as an AU on some of my accounts, just to get some kind of positive history for her -- it is nearly impossible for her to get anything of her own. I am not sure at this point if I would even tell her. At the same time, I feel credit rebuilding HAS to be at least partly an ACTIVE event, otherwise you will end up in the same (or worse) position. There is a lot more I could say, but I was wondering if anyone has any advice about it and adding her onto one or more of my accounts. Honestly, any advice is appreciated, as this is a difficult decision for me. Much thanks in advance. My brain and heart are not agreeing.
I can tell this is a difficult thing for you. You can add her as an AU and not give her the card. But I think you should maybe ask her first as you would need her SS# to do so. And as you mentioned she needs to be active in her credit repair too. Have you told her about this forum? She might want to see others that are facing the same challenges as her and overcoming them. It is hard to talk about finances to people you know but this is a safe place where you can tell the good and bad and not have to worry that people can id you in your day to day life. Whatever you choose, I wish you and your mother the best.
Thank you for your advice. I had not thought of pointing her to these boards. It is such a useful tool. And to be honest, I have rarely -- if ever -- seen more civil message boards on any site ever. I will do that for sure. I already have her SSN, as she asked me to look into some things for her and asked me to help. I have talked to her about some student loan baddies and let her know she needs to call because they will very likely work with her, and there have been changes in her life that may allow for adjustments that would benefit her. However, she still has not. And it has been months, and it would benefit her. That is why I am concerned about the "active" part of the whole thing. Thank you very much for your advice. Truly appreciated.
Tell her she can read and not even bother to post if she doesn't want to. I hope she will visit us. Wishing you both the best.
Thank you. 
I think that, like most of us, reading these boards may cause the infectious desire to fix things and give her the courage and knowledge to help herself.
Just be conscious that just because she's added as an AU that it doesn't mean that she will get the full history of the card, so it might be a detriment in the way that it might drop the AAoA - now if it's a low one that it won't matter or a very high one that won't make it matter, that's not an issue. It's the average sized AAoAs that would take the biggest hit. But of course, that's just one part of the score. If she's carrying big balances on her card/cards then the utilization boost would be more effective than the AAoA hit. 
I dunno about the not telling her though, I understand what you may be thinking in that she might think it's an option or something to that effect, but just better to do things 100% above board so to speak. Just my $0.02 -- you know just put it in the penny parking meter though. lol
I dunno about the not telling her though, I understand what you may be thinking in that she might think it's an option or something to that effect, but just better to do things 100% above board so to speak. Just my $0.02 -- you know just put it in the penny parking meter though. lol