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Mum's attitude.

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IOBA
Senior Contributor

Mum's attitude.

I have to tell you guys, it's taken me nearly two weeks to calm down over this one!  I learned that in January, my mom called up the cc and told them she couldn't afford the payment and made a short term payment arrangement for 6 weeks.  They closed the card at that time.  

 

Through a fluke, my mother called the bank about her/my cc.  She learned that the card had been closed in January.  

 

When I called to check on her, she informed me that she did NOT want to pay on the card anymore because it was closed.  (Main reason.)  Secondary reason was the interest was higher than she liked.   

 

After several conversations with her telling me she simply did NOT want to pay the card anymore because it was closed, I offered to call the cc and ask for a payment plan.  She agreed to that. I found out how much she "wanted" to pay (which was nothing cuz the card had been closed!) and how much she was "willing" to pay.  Then I called the cc and asked for payment plan.

 

1.  It was MY cc that I loaned to her years ago to help her move.

2.  It had a 2k limit with a 7.99% rate.  

3.  Many years later, she still has the card and is STILL paying on the charges from the move!  

4.  She denied "missed" payments, but I know they occurred. 

5.  ARGGHHHH!!

 

Lessons -

 

1.  Don't lend a cc to anyone.

2.  Keep the statements coming to your house (I let them go to her house.)

3.  Don't get upset the card is closed - still pay it.

4.  If things are tight, call the cc and ask for a payment plan.

 

I also learned that her cleared income (as retired) is more than double my income!  Things are pretty tight here with the reduced income, but we ARE making it.  (lol - you just heard my stomach growl, didn't you??)  Smiley Happy

 

I just ask, please do not ignore bills.  Please do not be afraid to call and ask for better terms.  If you don't know how to do that or are uncomfortable with it, please send me an email.  I will walk you through it.

 

And everyone, please pray that mum will be capable (in all facets of life) to be able to pay off that cc in five years.  Thank you. 

Message 1 of 6
5 REPLIES 5
DI
Super Contributor

Re: Mum's attitude.

I  hope things turn around quickly for the both of you.  That was nice to allow your mother to use your credit card.  Unfortunately, when you try to do nice things for others someone may take advantage of. you.  I call it a blind criminal.   Some things you just have to be selfish about to stay ahead.  Best wishes. 
Message 2 of 6
IOBA
Senior Contributor

Re: Mum's attitude.

Thank you Di.   I was just fuming over it!  I  work so hard not to go into debt despite the financial challenges, work really hard to have excellent credit, and help out others when needed/as I can.  And then this??

 

The shock of finding out she is making 5x+ what I thought their income was!

 

The shock of her attitude about paying the debt!

 

Smiley Sad

 

Call me disgruntled and disappointed.  I can't take over the debt right now.  Not even on the payment plan.

 

So, in staying positive, 5 yrs of on time payments will help my credit score recover from this.  The card is no longer in use.  I plan to make sure the payments are automatically deducted from her bank account, set up months in advance.  Smiley Happy 

Message 3 of 6
haulingthescoreup
Moderator Emerita

Re: Mum's attitude.

I hope you have online access to the account. I would check it every month, the morning after the automatic payment is supposed to be made, and confirm that it really did happen.

Did you set it to be made a week or so before the due date? That would give you a little wiggle room if your mom decides that she doesn't want to pay after all.

Fingers crossed for ya! I'd be scared witless.
* Credit is a wonderful servant, but a terrible master. * Who's the boss --you or your credit?
FICO's: EQ 781 - TU 793 - EX 779 (from PSECU) - Done credit hunting; having fun with credit gardening. - EQ 590 on 5/14/2007
Message 4 of 6
IOBA
Senior Contributor

Re: Mum's attitude.

I have never been able to set up the online banking stuff because I have not had the card in hand to submit all of those pesky additional numbers.   But I will be calling to make sure the payments are made.

 

The statements go directly to her and I don't see them.

 

She's not likely to tell me she missed a payment either.

 

Crossing my fingers and going forward.   Smiley Happy 

Message 5 of 6
Anonymous
Not applicable

Re: Mum's attitude.


@IOBA wrote:

I have to tell you guys, it's taken me nearly two weeks to calm down over this one!  I learned that in January, my mom called up the cc and told them she couldn't afford the payment and made a short term payment arrangement for 6 weeks.  They closed the card at that time.  

 

Through a fluke, my mother called the bank about her/my cc.  She learned that the card had been closed in January.  

 

When I called to check on her, she informed me that she did NOT want to pay on the card anymore because it was closed.  (Main reason.)  Secondary reason was the interest was higher than she liked.   

 

After several conversations with her telling me she simply did NOT want to pay the card anymore because it was closed, I offered to call the cc and ask for a payment plan.  She agreed to that. I found out how much she "wanted" to pay (which was nothing cuz the card had been closed!) and how much she was "willing" to pay.  Then I called the cc and asked for payment plan.

 

1.  It was MY cc that I loaned to her years ago to help her move.

2.  It had a 2k limit with a 7.99% rate.  

3.  Many years later, she still has the card and is STILL paying on the charges from the move!  

4.  She denied "missed" payments, but I know they occurred. 

5.  ARGGHHHH!!

 

Lessons -

 

1.  Don't lend a cc to anyone.

2.  Keep the statements coming to your house (I let them go to her house.)

3.  Don't get upset the card is closed - still pay it.

4.  If things are tight, call the cc and ask for a payment plan.

 

I also learned that her cleared income (as retired) is more than double my income!  Things are pretty tight here with the reduced income, but we ARE making it.  (lol - you just heard my stomach growl, didn't you??)  Smiley Happy

 

I just ask, please do not ignore bills.  Please do not be afraid to call and ask for better terms.  If you don't know how to do that or are uncomfortable with it, please send me an email.  I will walk you through it.

 

And everyone, please pray that mum will be capable (in all facets of life) to be able to pay off that cc in five years.  Thank you. 


 

Wow, that is quite a different perspective, to be disinclined to pay back money borrowed and to let you take the fall to boot....by your own Mom????  Wow.  Sorry for the situation....hope you get it worked out.

 

 

Message 6 of 6
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