@Anonymous wrote:
But as long as the accounts balance, life is good.
Bookkeeping terminology is unknown to me, but I take it you mean that when you add up household income, you get a number, and when you add up household expenses, you get the same number? Which applies regardless of whether it's his, hers and ours or simply ours?
@haulingthescoreup wrote:
I think that beamMEup was saying that if it makes sense for the couple involved, then it's good.
Sure. But I'm interested in knowing how separate accounts make sense. 
But some people just flat don't want to know, and there's not a whole lot you can do about that.
Right. But then it doesn't really make sense to them. 
Matt, your check story is interesting. But my assumption is that you have access to any account that's in your name (individual) or both names (joint). If one writes a check and forgets about it, it'll happen whether it's individual or joint. And these days of course you can just go online and see an image of the check.
Bill paying is another fun topic. Everything we have online accounts for is automated. For those few bills we get in the mail, either one of us can pay them. If I forget it, she'll step in. But I don't forget because I have a spreadsheet that lists all income and expenses, which has been massaged months in advance.
For the mutual agreement on bills, do you split the cost evenly? I suppose it could also be based on salary or usage. We completely bypass all of that. We wouldn't know how to measure if one uses more electricity or shampoo than the other. If one happens to eat noticeably more than the other, it's not primarily a financial problem, but a medical situation and should be addressed as such.
You and your wife enjoy maintaining individual accounts. Neither of us can say that. She has no interest in it, and I do it because I happen to be comfortable with numbers. But before everything got automated, she would write all the checks, lick the envelopes and put on the stamps to make up for me doing the spreadsheet.
Neither of us is excessive, because we know it means less money for paying extra on the mortgage. But when we go to the movie theatre, we share the large popcorn and soda combo simply because we have always done it. Neither of us likes butter on the popcorn, and we can surely agree on that one weekly beverage.
About the separate interests that hauling mentioned. When we married, we didn't do so to form an economic unit. Sure, we have separate interests, but none that require real money. We have autonomy whenever needed, but not to the extent that separate accounts are called for. But it should be noted that we didn't marry to spend time away from each other.
She would like to get this really nice espresso machine, and I don't drink coffee. She doesn't do such things often, she can get it a half price next month, and it'll keep her happy for years. I can't possibly raise an eyebrow at that. All those things even out between the two of us anyway in the long run.
But say we have separate accounts and she has her work hours reduced by half. She may need money to fullfill our bill arrangement. If she asks me for help, should I pull out a loan agreement for her to sign, and if she doesn't pay on time, should I take her to the local small claims court? I don't know. 
Well, no, I don't think of the main reason for marriage as establishing an economic unit, but that's one of the things that happens along the way.
Nerdy fyi, somehow remembered from my Greek history class: "economy" comes from the Greek word oikos, which means "household."
I will point out one thing: for those who write checks instead of using CC's, it's a whole lot easier to surprise one's honey with an espresso machine if the purchase doesn't display in the check register!
@marty56 wrote:
Seperate accounts allow both people to maintain their own credit histories. Many times a couple has been married say 50 years and the husband dies and the wife has no credit history.
A joint bank account can do that as well!
It also makes less stress because each partner pays the bills the way they want. I pay my CC card as soon as the charge posts and DW pays when she receives the statement.
But what if payments are on auto-pilot?
@Anonymous-own-fico wrote:
@marty56 wrote:
Seperate accounts allow both people to maintain their own credit histories. Many times a couple has been married say 50 years and the husband dies and the wife has no credit history.
A joint bank account can do that as well!
It also makes less stress because each partner pays the bills the way they want. I pay my CC card as soon as the charge posts and DW pays when she receives the statement.
But what if payments are on auto-pilot?
Ah, but the auto-pilot deal is not an issue if you're paying from two different checking accounts!
I do have to agree with marty on the payment timing thing. I'd go bananas if I knew that I might have balances reporting. DXH was very good-natured about paying early, but he also had an unnerving habit of charging something the day before the statement dropped.
I figure that since it's a given that I'm neurotic about a few things, life is better if I keep my accounts separate.
'scuse me, my eye is starting to twitch!
Hauling, I don't worry all that much about balances reporting anymore. We have about five cards each on mostly shared accounts, and I consider it part of life that a second might report at times.
Obsessive behaviour will prevail for a few key dates until Thanksgiving, but by New Year everything will have reported in an optimally clean fashion, barring forgetfulness of some sort. You just never know.
The forecast has made me rethink the need to pay before the statement date. Normal monthly charges won't dent our overall reported credit limit to take the util anywhere near outside the single digit comfort zone.
But I'll probably stick with paying before the statement date, for two reasons. One is that by nature I play it minimally. The other is the cushion to fall back paying by the due date. The scores though are not a concern.
When that is said, I'll give it a shot sometime next year to really bring them up beyond anything we have experienced in the past year. At the 6 month point of recent events and then again at 12 months. I'll keep you posted.