There's no definititive right or wrong way to go about it: as you noted, it depends on how much you're willing to pay for the service.
Right now, unless you're a member of a specific Pennsylvania Credit Union, there's no effective way to get one's Experian FICO score without a lender pulling it. The FICO scores cost as much as they do, because apparently the market will bear it. I too am a little disappointed that it's done that way as I'm confident a pull doesn't cost that much, but it is what it is.
I mostly do what you're suggesting: personally I spot check my EQ / TU FICO here (the EQ one is actually used for mortgage qualification with some minor possible differences but it's a very good barometer for it), and just use a free service to monitor my reports. The report data is what's really valuable and should be monitored in my estimation, the algorithm selected by most credit card issuers, auto loans, and most other products are wildly different, from FICO, to some 3rd party one (FAKO by definition), to their own internal scoring algorithm.
End of the day though, all the algorithms are going to judge your worthiness by what's in the report, and while they might have different criteria, a better report is going to generate a better score regardless. Just don't follow the advice the simulators give, this forum is excellent for research into what can, and almost always should be done, in order to improve your scores.
If you have a Walmart CC (store card or Discover), you can get your TU08 FICO free each month. Otherwise, there is the quarterly TU FICO available here at myfico.com.
EQ ScoreWatch (either from here or from EQ) will give you your current EQ FICO score and update you with any changes. You just have to be sure and update your "target score" to whatever your current score is, so that you will be notified when it changes. Whenever your score changes, you need to update your "target score" to the new score, so that you'll continue to be notified. Not sure why it works like that, but it seems to be the way it works.
As others have said, unfortunately there's no good way to get your EX FICO unless you live, or have family in, Pennsylvania.
BTW, I also use USAA CMS, which monitors all 3 credit reports, notifies you of changes. Plus you can pull a 3-in-1 CR every day if you want. I just ignore the scores on there, since they're FAKOs. 