Would you want a credit report when considering marriage?

[Anonymous]

I'm not saying one has to be perfect, but put the truth out there and let me decide if I want to deal with it. Be aware of your credit status, the goods and the bads and attempt to fix all that which  is not good  .  As the old folks used to say...what is done in the dark, comes out in the light. I'm sure that was meant for other situations, but I think it also applies here.

Ivy....I think it's great they way you handled things with hubby...

Message Edited by ObsessedwithmyFico on 06-03-2008 01:26 PM

[Anonymous]

Sidenote....after the marriage fiasco..I dated a guy I have known for years..but never had any reason to know his financial situation. It was always..."baby can you help me out". Then the biggie...He called and asked if I would buy a car for him and let him pay me since his credit is busted. I said NO!! BUT I will help you fix your credit so you can buy your own car. He declined the offer..So...relationship OFF...Ain't going there again....

[Anonymous]

Can you guys tell this is a sensitive subject with me?  lol

[Anonymous]

Here's another thread on this issue:

http://ficoforums.myfico.com/fico/board/message?board.id=ficoscoring&thread.id=21201&view=by_date_as....

Here's my history:

Ex-H:  I checked nothing.  Luckily, all I lost in that debacle was my life's savings.  My credit was not affected.

Ex-F:  I checked his CRs.  Saved me from making a big mistake.  The $10k in debt he claimed he had was actually $50k, but more importantly, it wasn't a priority for him to do much about it.

DF:  I checked his CRs as soon as the relationship became remotely serious.  I never checked the FICO score; it's irrelevant.  He didn't want to look at my CRs; he knows I'm a credit geek.  But we did disclose salary and exchange a list of assets and debts, and the lawyer is preparing a prenup.

[Anonymous]

posted by frugal on another thread and I so agree:

 seems that most of the replys on this subject is PRO for knowing the others scores in a relationship. If my ex girlfriend had known my score, I don't know if she would have supported me.  However, I had to do a lot of growing up  to do and face up to my responsiblities.  It wasn't fair to she, most importantly....ME.

It's amazing that when purchasing a new car (which is relevant on this site), one will ask every question about a car that will hopefully last up to 10 years before trading it in.  However, when it comes to someone you want to be with for the rest of your life, asking ONE important question about ones FICO Score seems to be taboo to some. Why is that?

Every ones advance and/or comment- I can learn from or can relate to.  Eventhough, I've never been married...I do feel knowing each others Scores and spending habits can cause less stress in a relationship- if both have a knowledge on improving finances together.  Love is great, but it doesn't pay at the gas pumps with a high APR on Gas cards...nor should

[marty56]

Why does it seem like the guy who will help the girl out never meet the girls who ill help the guy out.

In the past, if you put me in a room, I would pick the girl who would use me the most.

Being with someone who has the same values is very important.  The trick is to fgure out what they are.

If I waa single and it waa early on the relationship, I might bring up in the converstation about credit monitoring and views on credit in general.  My sister was dating, meet this guiy once who told her he loved cats.  My sister, an avid cat person, asked him about his cat and because she was a lawyer, was able to detrmine he probably was lying but she needed reall proof so she invited him over to her apartment.  He assumed they would be alone and he was going to get lucky/  He got lucky alright.  barely made it out of her aparment after she meet my sisters cats and his allergy to them kicked iin.

My point is that if we are serious about our credit, and everyone here is, we would be able to observe it in others by how they use and protect theirs.  That informatiuon may not always be found in their report and could be explained by someone who is good at lying.

[Anonymous]

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marty56 wrote:

My point is that if we are serious about our credit, and everyone here is, we would be able to observe it in others by how they use and protect theirs.  That informatiuon may not always be found in their report and could be explained by someone who is good at lying.

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I love the cat analogy.

The paragraph above begs the question which I think was raised in the other thread:

What if someone has good credit because they were very successful with PFDs, GWs, and the sorts of tactics we are not allowed to discuss on this board?  Should they disclose it?

I'm just throwing this out there for discussion ...

[Anonymous]

Marty...Marty..Marty..

I am the girl that would always help the guys out...until it appears they are doing nothing to help themselves because they feel I will always "pick up the slack"...So now...I am so tired of picking of the slack of slackers...I am viewed as "rich" (that's funny) because I always always pay my bills on time, and really do whatever it is I want to do. If I want to go somewhere, I go. Hawaii...Jamaica, Mexico...because I don't waste money on toys...I have no need for toys. no children at home...I pretty much do whatever I want because I am careful with my money and my credit. I have no issue helping out until I feel you are taking advantage of the situation (well now I do because I have been taken advantage of one too many times).  So I'm to the point where I want something for something..If you have nothing to offer..I have nothing to give. This is not a greedy attitude, it's a survival attitude..If I give to everyone that keeps asking for help, I won't be able to help myself..and I am tired of playing the fool for somebody that gives a rats ass about their own situation.

[marty56]

To me, the problem isnt so much say with a PFD for example as to what happend to to the person to get there and whatr the view about it.

IMHO a person who fell on some hard times through no fault of their own and had say a medical collection is quite different then someone who just decided not to pay an account thinking the creditor would just go away.  Also my friend whose soon to be ex-wife got a joint account into collections before he realized that happend offers a PFD to the CA to get ride of it.

[Anonymous]

And by the way...If you put me in a room full of men..I will pick the brokest one with the most children and the most issues...hands down...