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#1 It takes anywhere from 3-6 weeks to close on home, from the time you've made an offer to the date you walk into the attorney's office and sign the final paperwork, with most closings taking about 4 weeks. Depending on what you are looking for in a home and what homes are available, it could take as little as a couple weeks to find the home you want to make an offer on, up to several months. For my wife and I it took 4 months to finally decide on the home we wanted, there wasn't a ton of inventory like there is today, but there was still plenty of homes for someone less picky than us to find the home they would like in a much shorter period of time. These days you can find the home you want over the internet, Realtor.com has a very wide selection of homes to choose from... but ultimately I recommend you contact a real estate agent before you consider making offers or finalize your list.
#2 The pre-approval process shouldn't take much longer than 2-4 days, with most lenders doing it closer to the 2 day mark. Navy FCU is about the middle of the road, I've heard some people say they take awhile, whereas others say it's been really quick, it all depends on the level of volume they are going through at the time. The pre-approval process should just be filling out a complete loan application (which you've probably already done, or partially done, to get the pre-qualification), and supplying income/asset/down payment verification... then an underwriter at Navy FCU (or wherever) would review everything and then issue a pre-approval. I really suggest doing this as soon as possible, the pre-qual doesn't use much logic (like in the situation where you are changing jobs and might/might not have one by the time you are ready to buy), and usually is just reviewing the information you submitted online. Most pre-approvals are good for 120 days, although each lender will have it's own time limit on them. Being pre-approved essentially makes you a cash buyer in the eyes of the seller, so making offers on a home with a pre-approval letter in hand is definitely recommended.
#3 From the numbers you've laid out, your husband would have about $60,500 in qualifying income, as non-taxable income (it must continue when he moves to the U.S.) can be grossed up by 125% when qualifying. You will need to be employed in order to use your income, towards the end of the loan process the lender performs a verbal verification of employment to make sure you are still there. As long as you are on the loan they will consider your credit, but if you aren't employed then you wouldn't be contributing much to qualifying (other than any assets you have in your name alone). If that is something you are concerned about, not being employed when qualifying, then getting pre-approved & buying earlier might be the best route to take (you'd have to compare that to waiting for your husband). Your husband might also be able to qualify for the home on his own as well, it depends what his debt to income (DTI) ratio would be... what is the minimum payment on the $7k credit card? To determine the DTI you take the total monthly expenses (new housing payment + the minimum payment on the credit card) and divide it by the qualifying income ($60,500 in his case), you might need the help of Navy FCU or a lender/broker to determine what the anticipating housing payment would be. Housing payment includes the principal & interest payment, property taxes, homeowners insurance, and any homeowners association fees the new home might have.
One client I helped in a similar situation (husband was working in Iraq for a contracting company while the wife was in the states) the wife took a video camera through each home, and then emailed a .mpeg file to the husband so he can review the homes online like he was actually walking through them. You never know as well, you might find out that securing employment back in the states would be easy to do and then would be able to wait for your husband. With websites such as monster.com, careerbuilder.com, and jobster.com you might be able to find employment before you even return to the states.
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