...sigh ...shakes head ...gonna go set in the corner and contemplate my navel for a bit
...there are a wide variety of mortgage lenders that are not banks per se ...maybe most ...you'll find a wide variety of them referenced in this forum ...banks tend to be conservative ...big banks more so than small banks but still ...mortgage brokers, good ones, have a portfolio of mortgage lenders that they can work with ...if one can't meet your needs, a broker should have others on tap that can ...and the non-bank mortgage lenders tend to be more flexible than most banks would be with the same client data.
...sounds to me like you need to clean house and get a whole new team ...I'm currently working with 3 different realtors in very rural areas in Florida ...retiring and not quite sure exactly where we're going to roost yet though I did just make an offer on a short sale ...every one of those realtors has bent over backwards to help us find what we're looking for ...and every one of them had a short list of local lenders they recommended ...and we will be using one of them who has so far (knock on wood) been great
...understand why you want to go VA, they were my 1st choice as well ...but then my fav realtor went over the USDA advantages ...for me ...over using VA ...think about no limits on seller concessions and loan up to appraisal value regardless of sales contract price ...but be that as it may, it was just a suggestion because of your location.
...I'm going to take a liberty here and quote something SO10 just posted elsewhere that is so appropo to your situation:
"The agents work with lenders that produce results - that are responsive to the buyers regardless of the news. We usually have several lenders we work with so that the closing is smooth and closes on time. No agent is paid by any lender if you are thinking that is why they are referred. We would lose our license and our livelihood as it is illegal to collect any fee for the referral (RESPA violation etc).
The lenders we use and refer are referred for their excellence in the business, their expertise and their professionalism - and the fact that they close on time (as promised). A good loan officer makes the process easy and smooth. A bad loan officer makes it a nightmare for everyone involved. The most difficult thing is overcoming a LO that doesn't communicate well - it is heartbreaking to see the buyer/borrower not know what is happening with their file and to have the LO just not respond or to respond with platitudes rather than solutions.
That is why most of us Realtors keep a list of great LO's and a list of terrible LO's. That way we know if a buyer is using a terrible LO and won't switch to a decent one, we either have to pass on the offer (yes, this happens) or build in extra time for closing."
...hth
...hhhmmm ...I'm not frustrated with you ...nor snickering ...certainly not making fun of you ...been in your shoes and worse.
...your comments on WI realtors and lenders being totally different than those in FL or ME just don't compute ...realtors everywhere in the US work under the same general framework of rules and regs ...there are individual state differences but they are small ...and all of them are in the business to make money ...I've dealt with what I considered incompetent and/or lazy realtors here and had no problem moving on until I found ones that weren't either ...same with lenders.
...your first post cited the problem as being a caivrs issue that you've since resolved ...your last post, as I read it, cites a new problem with late installment payments as recent as 8/14 ...now that is a serious problem ...the VA loan guidelines are as follows:
"Reestablished Credit: In circumstances not involving bankruptcy, satisfactory credit is generally considered to be reestablished after the veteran, or veteran and spouse, have made satisfactory payments for 12 months after the date the last derogatory credit item was satisfied. For example, assume a credit report reveals several unpaid collections, including some which have been outstanding for many years. Once the borrower has satisfied the obligations, and then makes timely payments on subsequent obligations for at least 12 months, satisfactory credit is reestablished."
"For unpaid debts or debts that have not been paid timely, pay-off of these debts after the acceptability of applicant's credit is questioned does not alter the unsatisfactory record of payment."
Those are direct quotes from the VA's own credit analysis guidelines. If I read your post correctly, then I don't have any idea how your first lender approved you under those standards. Under the VA guidelines, LOEs cannot compensate for a recent late payment history. I can readily understand the CU's refusal to do so. The long and short of it may be that you will have to wait until you have 12 mts of on-time payment of all debts before you can obtain a VA loan. I realize that's not what you want to hear ...and it may well be that Shane, Dallas, or another mortgage pro here can offer another answer.
Your frustration is more than understandable ...your first lender lead you to believe everything was ok until you hit the CAIVRS wall ...you've worked hard to fix that only to find your first lender still refusing you and now a CU has as well ...and here I am giving you more bad news ...really wish I had a better answer.
Bad news maybe, but clear news at least. Yes - that first lender pulled our credit in Nov 2014 and said we were good to go up to $345k. We have the VA certification and he gave us an instant pre-approval. That blew us away but what the heck, we had been trying hard to rebuild after the medical bill crisis after the car accident surgeries. I see what the VA guidelines state but I do know that they asked us to write a letter of explanation for the lates and we got through UW - it was that damn title issue that sent them running the other direction. So how can they get through the UW with the financials at that Lender then and not others?
Yes, it's been a horrible experience - had that Broker ran our CAIVRs when we initially contacted him last Nov we would probably be in a much better situation right now and my mind not in so many knots.
I contacted the CU that held our installment loans and asked them to GW them, they refused. Those are the only lates we have. I did receive a nice letter from the EVP though - he stated that he did admire the fact that I stayed in constant contact with them and kept them informed of our situation and of course continued to pay, just not on time. In his letter he stated - now this is the EVP - "Normally those situations, while having a large short term effect on a credit score, tend to bounce most of the way back fairly quickly (not entirely sure what he thinks is 'quickly'), especially when everything stays up to date movig forward. I do know, because of the number of mortgages LCU completes, that if your monthly rent payment remained current that will go a long way in getting a mortgage approved - assuming you are current on your other debts today. Now at the time we were going through this we had prob 20 credit cards all maxed out also - from paying these bills and trying to live. During the time we were late on these installment loans we never, ever, were late or missed a cc payment or a rent payment. This EVP is stating this should mean something, but it obviously doesn't? I'm thinking too bad they don't do VA loans or I'd take this letter, personally, to his doorstep and ask him for a mortgage!! 
We are just in such rough shape where we're at. Way too small. I work from home and I've outgrown my office something fierce. I'm to the point that the lack of space is impeding my work flow and that''s not a good thing. We have rescued 3 dogs who deserve their own yard and we have 8 grandkids that really can't come visit as we have no room for anything or anywhere to put them. It's horrible. We actually started this process 2 years ago but abruptly stopped when the DH fell on ice and sheared his humerus off his elbow. We fell behind in getting the paperwork in on the contract we signed and after we went through the expense of a $600 inspection and making plans for remodel - it was a money pit - the owner wouldn't give us a 2 week extension on our contract and turned around and sold the property to his current renters. So we've dealt with our share of disappoint and getting out of this matchbox is really a new lease on life for us.
Thanks for the information, tells why the 2nd CU shut me down before I got a foot in the door. But then again I think the EVP also gave me some false hope unless there is someone out there that knows how to get around the guidelines. I know I've seen a lot about, and we did one, letters of explanation and our credit history clearly shows the tale. Before these surgeries came up our history was clear and since 08/14, it's been clear. Ugh.
Thanks, Lemmus.
...its a long shot but you've got absolutely nothing to lose by sending another round of GW letters ...get a list of officers there and send a GW to each ...it only takes one to relent ...tell them the same story why you need a new home now ...rip their hearts out, pile the guilt on ...etc etc ...like I said, it only takes one ...and myFico is replete with tales of repeated GW efforts that finally got results
...otoh its only 4 mts to september and you can resubmit ...by then you should be able to find a good realtor AND lender ...read here often, pay attention, and you'd be amazed how much you will find you already know when your time comes ...good luck
...it depends ...everyone of them GWs someone at sometime ...that line you cited is the standard "GO AWAY, LEAVE US ALONE" bs that is their first line of defence
...of course, they are tecnically correct ...the contracts exist, the language exists ...but then for every rule, there is an exception ...make yourself the exception
...I'd bet 99 percent of GW requesters walk away when they are first refused ...but there are thousands of exceptions noted in these forums where CAs under the same cited contractual obligations did the right thing and deleted the negs ...your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to find the person who will make an exception for you ...and thats not mission impossible.
...search the Rebuilding Credit forum for GW letter templates ...find one than fits your situation ...use it as a template and change it to make it your own ,,,then start your campaign ...good luck, eh
Mission impossible - cute 
Thanks for the help - I greatly appreciate!