No, the closing cost should only be 3-5% of the purchased price. Additional financed numbers should be factored into the loan. Ask to have the home owners insurance and property taxes escrow into the monthly mortgage. If the house is appraised for more than the asking price then ask to use the equity and add the remaining cost into the loan. It will still be cheaper to factor in amount over 30 years and have additional money in your pocket now. Just research as much as you can and go back to your LO with questions.
Did you ask the seller to cover any closing cost? Don't give up. I've been under 3 contracts this year along, and each time I learn more about the process. Sometimes I think this process is meant to discourage people. Stay the course, you'll find what works. The reward will be worth it. Stay encouraged