I hear you, Mauve.
They are elderly - my dad is almost 81 and in failing health. If he lives through this year, I will be surprised. My mother has been called a "monster" by people who know what she has done to me. When my father passes, I will be gone from her life.
He was my saving grace and the only reason I have some semblance of sanity He is the only reason I feel compelled/obligated to help. And truly, with the money I make, I don't mind... just wish they'd listen to me... as you said, quit fighting me.
We all do what we can do.