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My wife just told me about 50,000 in hidden debt.

New Member

My wife just told me about 50,000 in hidden debt.

My wife does all the bills, I trusted her and let her take care of it all. Last night she came to me and told me everything. We have about 40 credit cards almost all maxed out. 95% are store brand cards and the total is about 56,000. She says we are negative 590 every month, but our bills are paid. That I don't understand? because we got out, she buys groceries, we buy what we need (no kids) she said she pays all the bills and only recently has been late on two credit cards. I'm still kind of numb from hearing all this. Our credit was never fantastic but last I checked for my car loan my score was 650 apparently now it's 527 and hers is about the same as mine. She is looking for a therapist to figure out what the hell her issue is with spending money and I'm going to try and get us out of this. If that is even possible. 

 

 

Some info...

Own zero property 

can not borrow from family

I decided to take out 10,000 from my retirement at 4% interest to pay down some of these retail cards. I'm only 38 so its really not going to affect my retirement much if at all.

The only cards I knew about were Discover, Kay, Old Navy, Macys and a capitol one. Whenever we go out, we use debit cards. Grocery shopping she always uses a debit card so none of this makes sense! Yes, I noticed a bunch of useless crap in the house, but eh, I have no excuse actually. I should have been more aware so I should take a good portion of the blame. 

 

I have a list of bills and balances if that even helps, but what do you guys think? The only option I have is this 10,000. It looks like a huge portion of this debt is from one company called Comenity. Any help would be very much appreciated. Credit counseling an option?  Smiley Sad

 

EDIT to add the list of the CC debt I really don't want to do bankruptcy is there any other way? If you're seeing double it's because she opened them in BOTH our names separate cards. I'm not taking her cards away. There are no cards to take, it's almost all internet sales it would do zero good. She's got one shot to fix this and I'm hoping she sticks to it once she seeks help.

 

Kay$0 $95 $1,081 $1,081 

Amazon 1$27 $800 

Amazon 2$27 $800 

Credit One (1)$45 $967 (60 days late)

Credit One (2)$45$1,030     (30 days late)

Walmart 1$25 $700 

Walmart 2$25 $580 

Care One (1)$27 $794 

Care One (2)$35 $1,031 

Hot Topic$25 $81 

Lowes$28 $236 $236 

Old Navy$25$321 $321 

Victoria$25 $213 $213 

Brylane$25 $135 $135 

Finger Hut 1$59 $1,084 

Finger Hut 2$69 $680 

Game Stop $67 $$2,347 

Game Stop$67 $2,096 

WayFair$95 $2,797 

Overstock $66 $1,270 

Overstock $200$$3,900 

Kohls $27 $633 

Kohls $27 $636 

PayPal $45 

PayPal $30 

Shell$$300 $300 

Pier 1$39 $787 

Pier 1$46 $1,014 

Crate and B$77 $300 $3,026 

Cap 1$78 $3,091 

Cap 1$61 $2,133 

Cap 1$31 $1,062 

Cap 1$48 $1,479 

Cap 1$52 $1,667 

Merrick $58 $1,591 

JCP        $25                  $152 

Macys$93 $3,100 

Discover$124                 $5,000

 

Message 1 of 71
70 REPLIES
Community Leader
Valued Contributor

Re: My wife just told me about 50,000 in hidden debt.

First thing, and no offense, take every card there is from her. A list with balances, limits, and APR's would help give you ideas on how to deal with this.
Message 2 of 71
Established Contributor

Re: My wife just told me about 50,000 in hidden debt.


Focused4Change wrote:

My wife does all the bills, I trusted her and let her take care of it all. Last night she came to me and told me everything. We have about 40 credit cards almost all maxed out. 95% are store brand cards and the total is about 56,000. She says we are negative 590 every month, but our bills are paid. That I don't understand? because we got out, she buys groceries, we buy what we need (no kids) she said she pays all the bills and only recently has been late on two credit cards. I'm still kind of numb from hearing all this. Our credit was never fantastic but last I checked for my car loan my score was 650 apparently now it's 527 and hers is about the same as mine. She is looking for a therapist to figure out what the hell her issue is with spending money and I'm going to try and get us out of this. If that is even possible. 

 

 

Some info...

Own zero property 

can not borrow from family

I decided to take out 10,000 from my retirement at 4% interest to pay down some of these retail cards. I'm only 38 so its really not going to affect my retirement much if at all.

The only cards I knew about were Discover, Kay, Old Navy, Macys and a capitol one. Whenever we go out, we use debit cards. Grocery shopping she always uses a debit card so none of this makes sense! Yes, I noticed a bunch of useless crap in the house, but eh, I have no excuse actually. I should have been more aware so I should take a good portion of the blame. 

 

I have a list of bills and balances if that even helps, but what do you guys think? The only option I have is this 10,000. It looks like a huge portion of this debt is from one company called Comenity. Any help would be very much appreciated. Credit counseling an option?  Smiley Sad

 


I would hold off on dipping into your 401k and consult with a bankruptcy attorney ASAP.

Ch 7 Discharge May 2015: EQ 588/TU 552/EX 570
Nov 2017: EQ 683/TU 660/EX 668 w/ 24% CC util reporting
Discover/Target/NFCU CLOC/NFCU Cash Rewards/PenFed Power Cash Rewards - $46k total revolving
Message 3 of 71
New Member

Re: My wife just told me about 50,000 in hidden debt.

Thanks i'll update with balances and how much we have to pay each month as that's what I was working on. As far as APR goes they are all VERY HIGH 25,20,29

Message 4 of 71
Community Leader
Valued Contributor

Re: My wife just told me about 50,000 in hidden debt.

IMHO, I would knock out everything that's in your name that you can.  Then I would start a GW campaign on the late payment with Credit One.  Be honest in your letter that the account was opened without your consent, that you are doing everything that you can to rectify the situation, that your wife is seeking counseling and that you really need their help.  If you can bring your scores up then maybe you can qualify for some sort of loan at a lower interest rate and start knocking out her cards after that.



EQ 679 EXP 700 TU 763
Message 5 of 71
Frequent Contributor

Re: My wife just told me about 50,000 in hidden debt.

What is your income??
Last app 1/2/2017.
In the garden until at least 6/2/2017.
Message 6 of 71
New Member

Re: My wife just told me about 50,000 in hidden debt.

After all deductions $5,000 a month 

Message 7 of 71
Frequent Contributor

Re: My wife just told me about 50,000 in hidden debt.

How much left after paying all your living expenses? I.e. Car to get to work, house, elec, phone, etc?
Last app 1/2/2017.
In the garden until at least 6/2/2017.
Message 8 of 71
Community Leader
Valued Contributor

Re: My wife just told me about 50,000 in hidden debt.

Can she get a second job?  Not to sound harsh, but if I were in your shoes I would do everything I can to save your credit, limit the amount that stays in your name and have her come up with a way to make the extra money to pay these off.  See if you can come up with a 36 month plan.  If it comes down to it, and you do end up having to file bankruptcy, try to limit it to her name only.  Also, until a lot of the debt is paid off, I don't know that I would close any of the accounts, even ones that have a $0 balance.  You're going to need the credit limits to help with your utilization and scores.  How much of the debt is in your name?



EQ 679 EXP 700 TU 763
Message 9 of 71
New Member

Re: My wife just told me about 50,000 in hidden debt.

Rent, cars, insurance, phone/cable all that stuff is $3200.  She doesn't work this is just my income. I told her to at the very least do Uber or Lyft. I understand this is her fault and I get people wanting to clear my name before hers. I don't really care about that. I just want us both to come out of this without too much harm. I only told my brother about this and he suggested I go to a credit counseling service. I heard those are worse than bankruptcies and plus, we're only late on two. I thought you had to be way late. 

Message 10 of 71