Farmgirl, it appears to me that the "telephone" negotiations are not reliable. I would therefore stick to written communications so that terms and timelines are clear and without question.
I would NOT request GW at this point. It would do zero if you get a GW, only to later find that you cannot keep up and end up with the lates again. They won't GW you again anytime soon. I would wait till you have your mortgage negotiated and working.
And, you all ready know my opinion: You need shelter, food, clothing, medical. You do not need credit. You need to stop making credit score decisions and start making life back on track decisions.
I suggested previously that you speak to a BK attorney, not to actually go BK, but to get the info and know your options. You have talked with a CCCS and have had questionable results....they negotiated deals that fell through which you were able to secure directly (yourself) better terms....and some of your creditors won't deal with them at all. Thus, they are not a solution in my opinion.
You need first to sit down and create a budget. You need to know what your income. You need to create a budget for necessities (see above what I consider necessities). Then you can see what is left over. If there is left over, you can use that to negotiate or settle CC's and other debt. But if not, what good is there in negotiating a deal. If you do not have the income, don't have the health to generate more income and are too far behind to get caught up and the creditors want large lumps ($10k), then don't make things worse.
You asked for my input. I'm not going to sugar coat it. You may have to go BK. You may not. If you really don't want to, then you are going to have to get the mortgage company to play ball. Start with a letter which describes the following "non-negotiable" points;
1. All past due amounts must be put to the back of the loan.
2. I can only pay $XXX dollars per month in payment.
3. I cannot pay any lump sum beyond monthly payments.
If they can't do this, what is it you think you can get out of the negotiation? Nothing.
You can look into the government refi and bail out plans to see if qualify in any way. MyFico even has a been promoting a site that can help you decide if you are qualified: http://www.mortgagereliefonline.com/
But in the end, i fear you will have to make some difficult choices. Please do not misinterpret my plain talk with heartless or uncaring. I can empathize completely. I have been in the position of having little or no options and having to make the toughest calls I could remember. But, once you start making them, you begin to get some control back and see some light (hope) at the end of the tunnel.
Good luck on this and hope to hear from you soon 