Credit Cards Center Credit cards from our partners
Reply
Contributor
Posts: 137
Registered: ‎03-03-2014
0

A crush on someone, and feeling you aren't good enough because of your financial problems.

This feels awkward...since most of these posts are about ACTUAL relationships.

 

But I have a crush on a guy right now who as far as I know has one car loan. I work with him. I dont think he has tons of cc debt, though I guess you really never know. But I've always seen him use a debit card.

 

I feel like he would be really disgusted by all my student loans (he didn't go to college) and my cc debt. I feel as if he would find it a huge turnoff, and would never want to date me. It makes me feel very ashamed. Sometimes I think he might like me, but he might run for the hills if he knew I had nearly $47k (you read that right) in student loans, and $1600 in cc debt. : (

 

Has anyone here dealt with debt, loans, and feeling like someone would reject you because of crappy finances?

I have a lot of credit cards. Too many to fit in my signature. But I love them all.
TU 692, EQ 650 EX 660 as of 05/2014
Walmart FICO 683 | CreditKarma 652 | CreditSesame 671 | Capital One free credit score 652
Valued Contributor
Posts: 1,094
Registered: ‎04-24-2014
0

Re: A crush on someone, and feeling you aren't good enough because of your financial problems.


triedtogetacardandcouldnt wrote:

This feels awkward...since most of these posts are about ACTUAL relationships.

 

But I have a crush on a guy right now who as far as I know has one car loan. I work with him. I dont think he has tons of cc debt, though I guess you really never know. But I've always seen him use a debit card.

 

I feel like he would be really disgusted by all my student loans (he didn't go to college) and my cc debt. I feel as if he would find it a huge turnoff, and would never want to date me. It makes me feel very ashamed. Sometimes I think he might like me, but he might run for the hills if he knew I had nearly $47k (you read that right) in student loans, and $1600 in cc debt. : (

 

Has anyone here dealt with debt, loans, and feeling like someone would reject you because of crappy finances?


Haven't had your situation, but $1600 isn't that much in CC debt.  Have you graduated?  If you haven't what about applying and at least getting your AA.  Anyway what interest rate are you paying on your student loans?  If you're interest is too high, there's a bill before Congress to allow you to reduce the rate.  

 

In the mean time, remember people spend just as much money for a 4-6 year car loan and they have nothing to show for it in the end.  Your education has value even if you haven't completed your studies.  If you have completed your studies, it's worth even more.  As long as you're responsible with your debt, it won't be a turn off.  Just get to know him and let him get to know you.  Good luck.

  Original Mortgage maturity Sept 2044; Refi maturity Jan 2031
Starting Score: EX 751 EQ 720 TU 737 on 4/9/14; Gardening since 10/24/15; Garden until 1/2017

Established Contributor
Posts: 988
Registered: ‎04-03-2014
0

Re: A crush on someone, and feeling you aren't good enough because of your financial problems.

I generally find if the guy is attracted to you he doesn't care about anything else, at least initally. So ask him out and get to know him. No regrets in life, so ask him out or you'll wonder "what if"

Credit Cards: AmEx Platinum (NPSL), Citi Prestige ($17.5K), Simmons ($5.5K), IberiaBank ($14K)
Personal Lines of Credit: U.S. Bank ($5K), Wells Fargo ($11.2K), Citibank ($9K), PenFed CU ($1K), LA Financial CU ($20K)
myFICO 3B Report (as of 4/30/16): Experian: Score 8: 786; Mortgage Score 2: 809 Equifax: Score 8: 801; Mortgage Score 5: 809 Transunion: Score 8: 796; Mortgage Score 4: 796
Utilization: 1%-2% (PIF monthly)
Last Hard Inquiries: 5 mortgage inquiries 5/3/16 through 5/24/16
Frequent Contributor
Posts: 439
Registered: ‎06-01-2014
0

Re: A crush on someone, and feeling you aren't good enough because of your financial problems.


youdontkillmoney wrote:

I generally find if the guy is attracted to you he doesn't care about anything else, at least initally. So ask him out and get to know him. No regrets in life, so ask him out or you'll wonder "what if"


This.  Further, one's financial situation is not a topic until things might get serious anyway.

Contributor
Posts: 137
Registered: ‎03-03-2014
0

Re: A crush on someone, and feeling you aren't good enough because of your financial problems.

Oh, and there's my bankruptcy. I'm sure he'll find that very attractive.

 

I realize that it's not something to get into until things are serious, but many people don't even want to date someone with financial problems in the first place.

I have a lot of credit cards. Too many to fit in my signature. But I love them all.
TU 692, EQ 650 EX 660 as of 05/2014
Walmart FICO 683 | CreditKarma 652 | CreditSesame 671 | Capital One free credit score 652
Established Member
Posts: 284
Registered: ‎06-10-2014
0

Re: A crush on someone, and feeling you aren't good enough because of your financial problems.



triedtogetacardandcouldnt wrote:

Oh, and there's my bankruptcy. I'm sure he'll find that very attractive.

 

I realize that it's not something to get into until things are serious, but many people don't even want to date someone with financial problems in the first place.




I think the fact that you are trying to get everything in order and working on improving your financial situation mutes a lot of the bad from the past. What you did then only matters now if you aren't trying to make it better.

 

Ask him lunch and keep it cheap lol


Starting Score: 382 - 418 (2005) -- Current Score: 628 (TU08) -- 661 (Beacon 5.0) -- Goal Score: 750+
Into the Garden 6-15-2014 -- Digging in the dirt until 6-2015
Valued Contributor
Posts: 3,415
Registered: ‎06-21-2014
0

Re: A crush on someone, and feeling you aren't good enough because of your financial problems.


Carrie_in_Pa wrote:


triedtogetacardandcouldnt wrote:

Oh, and there's my bankruptcy. I'm sure he'll find that very attractive.

 

I realize that it's not something to get into until things are serious, but many people don't even want to date someone with financial problems in the first place.




I think the fact that you are trying to get everything in order and working on improving your financial situation mutes a lot of the bad from the past. What you did then only matters now if you aren't trying to make it better.

 

Ask him lunch and keep it cheap lol


 +1 I could care less 

 

 

The only time Finances matter is if the person isn't attempting to fix it imo. 


My Cards: Amex BCE: $9,000, Amex Hilton HHonors: $2,000, Amex ED: $12,000, Barclays NFL extra points: $3,000, Bank of America MLB cash rewards: $17,000, BBVA compass NBA Amex triple double rewards: $17,000, Chase Amazon: $1,000, Chase Freedom: $9,000, Chase Sapphire: $5,000, Chase Slate: $5,000, Chase Disney: $4,000, Citi Double Cash: $5,400, Citi AA plat: $5,500, Citi Simplicity: $3,000, Citi Thank you preferred: $8,800, Capital one GM: $2,000, Capital one PlayStation: $3,000, Gamestop: $1,150, Amazon Store: $5,000, Ebay MasterCard: $5,000, American Eagle Storecard: $750, Macy's: $500
EX: 744, TU:750, EQ: 740
Regular Contributor
Posts: 126
Registered: ‎05-27-2014
0

Re: A crush on someone, and feeling you aren't good enough because of your financial problems.

As previously said, it's too early in the dating game for someone to care about finances.   Also, I think what matters more is the drive to improve yourself.  I respect those who are doing everything they can to get themselves out of a hole (no matter how deep the hole) and when they show discipline in their everyday life.  

Experian: 729 Equifax: 740 Transunion: 732
Capital One Mastercard: $0.4K, Capital One Quicksilver: $5K, Chase Southwest Premier: $7.5K, Amex Blue Cash Everyday: $24.9K, Discover It: $9.4K, Chase Sapphire Preferred: $16.9K, Citi Hilton HHonors Reserve: $7.7K, Arrival+ BarclayCard MC WE: $7.5K
New Contributor
Posts: 138
Registered: ‎06-23-2014
0

Re: A crush on someone, and feeling you aren't good enough because of your financial problems.

I have never questioned a females finances that I was dating, That is stuff that comes up way later in a relationship when it's very serious. So I would forget all about that and just get to know him better first and have fun! For all you know he only uses debit card because his credit sucks and he can't get a credit card!

Current Score: 639 (3.06%) 19pt gain

Frequent Contributor
Posts: 489
Registered: ‎03-19-2013
0

Re: A crush on someone, and feeling you aren't good enough because of your financial problems.

[ Edited ]

triedtogetacardandcouldnt wrote:

Oh, and there's my bankruptcy.


Smiley Indifferent The future house payment would sky rocket.  I ask for a social security on my first date. 

 

 

 

jk dont take me serious lol... My seriousness level is on my forum avatars face..

Forums posts are not provided or commissioned by FICO. Forums posts have not been reviewed, approved or otherwise endorsed by FICO. It is not FICO's responsibility to ensure all posts and/or questions are answered.

Advertiser Disclosure: The listings that appear on myFICO are from companies from which myFICO receives compensation, which may impact how and where products appear on myFICO (including, for example, the order in which they appear). myFICO does not review or include all companies or all available products.
† Credit cards for FICO Score ranges: The score ranges are guidelines based on internal myFICO analysis of actual applicant approvals, and having a FICO Score in a particular range does not guarantee you will be approved for credit cards recommended in that range. These ranges were not provided by any card issuer.

Copyright ©2001-2015 Fair Isaac Corporation. All rights reserved.   | Terms of Use | Privacy Policy | Sitemap

IMPORTANT INFORMATION: All FICO® Score products made available on myFICO.com include a FICO® Score 8, along with additional FICO® Score versions. Your lender or insurer may use a different FICO® Score than the versions you receive from myFICO, or another type of credit score altogether. Learn more

FICO, myFICO, Score Watch, The score lenders use, and The Score That Matters are trademarks or registered trademarks of Fair Isaac Corporation. Equifax Credit Report is a trademark of Equifax, Inc. and its affiliated companies. Many factors affect your FICO Score and the interest rates you may receive. Fair Isaac is not a credit repair organization as defined under federal or state law, including the Credit Repair Organizations Act. Fair Isaac does not provide "credit repair" services or advice or assistance regarding "rebuilding" or "improving" your credit record, credit history or credit rating. FTC's website on credit.