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Adding Girlfriend as AU

Super Contributor

Re: Adding Girlfriend as AU


marty56 wrote:

Dinosaur wrote:
Based on her ongoing track record ... do you really want to risk your own credit reputation?

I don't see the risk here unless you give her the card.

 

If she does get the card and starts using it without your permission, then she is doing you a favor by helping end a realtionship that could get much worse down the road.

 

Anyway its a win-win situation for you regardless of how it turns out.


On this thread there are many very interesting and related posts to your potential situation. You may want to explore them so that you may glean additional insight from others who have wrestled with the similar situation. Since you are getting near the end of your educational phase move carefully so you don't end up unhappy later on. Must have missed the part about not giving the partner the card as that might work but ... I have lived a lot of life and the person needs to acquire a desire to take ownership and understand about credit or they will likely not change. As an aside ... "love is blind" ....

Starting Score: 802
Current Score: 821
Goal Score: 850


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Regular Contributor

Re: Adding Girlfriend as AU


Dinosaur wrote:

marty56 wrote:

Dinosaur wrote:
Based on her ongoing track record ... do you really want to risk your own credit reputation?

I don't see the risk here unless you give her the card.

 

If she does get the card and starts using it without your permission, then she is doing you a favor by helping end a realtionship that could get much worse down the road.

 

Anyway its a win-win situation for you regardless of how it turns out.


On this thread there are many very interesting and related posts to your potential situation. You may want to explore them so that you may glean additional insight from others who have wrestled with the similar situation. Since you are getting near the end of your educational phase move carefully so you don't end up unhappy later on. Must have missed the part about not giving the partner the card as that might work but ... I have lived a lot of life and the person needs to acquire a desire to take ownership and understand about credit or they will likely not change. As an aside ... "love is blind" ....


Dino dude you've got a fantastic score keep it up. Smiley Very Happy

Total CL $101,850 w/PayPal Credit In the garden until 2019. Smiley Happy
Contributor

Re: Adding Girlfriend as AU

No AU period. Don't let her stupidity become your stupidity. And I don't care how magical her stuff is either. Wink, wink.
Established Contributor

Re: Adding Girlfriend as AU


ABCD2199 wrote:

Adding her as AU is putting lipstick on a pig, for lack of a better term.

 

Even with your AU account, she will still have maxed out cards which have the worst effect on FICO scores and will spook lenders.  

 

She needs to attack her spending budget immediately, work extra hours or gig economy jobs, and pay it all down to $0.  If she can't do that, be cautious.


Echoing these sentiments. What do you hope to accomplish by making her an AU? Improve her score so she can land more credit and max it out too? If this is how she handles credit, she needs Chase and BoA to AA her.

 

If you want to help her, AU isn't the way to do it. You're just as likely to enable her. Addicts don't need enabling, they need intervention.

Super Contributor

Re: Adding Girlfriend as AU

10/17/2017 FICO: EQ 829 TU 830 EX 826
Established Contributor

Re: Adding Girlfriend as AU


marty56 wrote:

It is not my intent to be argumentative or go back and forth as I certainly get what you are saying and it's a very valid point.  One of the great things I personally love about this forum is that there are so many varied opinions - a great way to make more solid choices and decisions!  

 

But...

 

What's that saying?....wisdom is wasted on the young?

 

How many stories have we read on myFico.com alone that contained.."...if I only I knew then what I know now..." or "...I was young and didn't know better",  or "... I was young and dumb.." etc.

 

Personally, I think it is upon those who have been there, done that and got the t-shirt...to try to help others not make the same mistakes.  Parents often want their children to do better than they did - not the same or worse - and certainly not to repeat things they regret.  Part of being a caring community is try to prevent others from falling down and bumping their head.  But also, if we fall, to encourage each other while down and help each other get back up in whatever way that is beneficial.

 

Not everyone make the same mistakes, but all have made mistakes - atleast I have. I have never been thousands of dollars in CC debt in my twenties, thirties or even up until now.  But, I had student loans and would warn others in taking on too much student loans debt.

 

I married someone who had no problem with huge CC debt and lived through the financial stress that such irresponsibility brings on a relationship.  It use to be that financial problems was one of the biggest reasons for divorce.  I don't know if that still holds true, but it wouldn't surprise me if that's still the case.

 

 

Again, it's not about not ever having made a mistake, but helping others not making the same mistake. In the end, whether in our 20s, 30' 40s or 80s, it's our choice to learn from others mistakes ... or not.

 

 ..and in the spirit of not being argumentative...or getting way off the OPs concerns...I digress.

 

gardening til: 02/02/2018..updated: 08/31/2017..rebuild: 02/2016 EQ: 648 TU: 642 EX: 657
Curr. Score (Mortgage): EQ 05: 727, TU 04: 754, EX 02: 789
Goal Score (Mortgage): EQ 05: 760, TU 04: 760, EX 02: 789
Curr. Score (Fico 8): EQ: 760, TU: 770, EX: 809
Goal Score (Fico 8): EQ: 800, TU: 800, EX: 809 - Take the myFICO Fitness Challenge
Super Contributor

Re: Adding Girlfriend as AU


LOTR wrote:

marty56 wrote:

 One of the great things I personally love about this forum is that there are so many varied opinions - a great way to make more solid choices and decisions!  

 

 

I agree.   When it comes to money and relationships, many times it is very hard to know what the right thing to do.

10/17/2017 FICO: EQ 829 TU 830 EX 826
Highlighted
Moderator

Re: Adding Girlfriend as AU


marty56 wrote:

Heh.

 

It's a late opinion but really the goal is to get financial partners talking... that'll sort all sorts of things in the long run.  If I and whatever theoretical chica in my life are on the same page financially, even if her credit score is back where I started, if we're talking and can figure out how to make it work I'd absolutely throw every bit of knowledge and tricks I could (including AU's) to try to shorten the period of credit pain.

 

Why wouldn't you do that for someone you care about?  

 

However, if we weren't on the same page... that's kind of a deal breaker for me.

Starting Score: EQ 5 561, TU 98 567, EX 2 599 (12/30/11)
Current Score: EQ 5 771, TU 4 758, EX 2 758, EQ 8 795, TU 8 762, EX 8 786 (7/28/17)
Goal Score:    EQ 5 750, TU 4 750, EX 2 750, EQ 8 800, TU 8 Blah, EX 8 800 (01/01/18)


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Established Member

Re: Adding Girlfriend as AU

I can't say anything else that you haven't heard from everyone on this post.

 

I did the same thing,  I add my girlfriend as an AU on one of my lower balance credit card, just in case she need something and cannot reach me (I'm deployed),  She is not great with finance and credit card(she see the money of the credit card as availble credit to spend) after a month she ran it up and I had to cut her off and pay back the money.  I preach and run a budget with her on how to spend the money.  I explain clearly if you ever used the credit card pay it off the next month entirely.  SHe do not understand the concept of credit and I am letting her learn the hard way becuase she keep on maxing out her card and get mad when I keep telling her I do not have any monty.

 

I am pay off my credit cards, school loan, car loan, and then I will attack my mortage. 

Gardening ‎10-13-2017
FICO 8[10-25-2017] EX: 706, EQ: 714, TU: 719
New Member

Re: Adding Girlfriend as AU


HeavenOhio wrote:

 ..allow you to charge a little over the limit rather than declining the charge. Another way to get 113% is to accumulate interest.


The interest!  Especially at a fairly hefty rate and with minimum payments it will quickly balloon out of control.  Her putting an extra $1000 at the debt will help considerably, especially if she can stick to that and rein in those spending habits.  Best of luck.

In the Garden until 4-01-2018