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Concerned with BFs Finances?

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Anonymous
Not applicable

Re: Concerned with BFs Finances?


@grinlikechelsea wrote:

@Anonymous wrote:

i would not share accounts nor live together until he gets his finanace education on check! 


It's a moot point now since we've broken up a week ago. It turns out that in addition to being awful at finances, he was cheating on me too. Oh well, at least it wasn't messy with living arrangements or finances.

 

Thank you all for the advice regardless. I appreciate it. 


I'm sorry to hear about the infidelity. That always hurts. Smiley Sad

 

The unfortunate thing about people who behave irresponsibly in one area is that it usually isn't limited to that one area. They tend to be irresponsible in other areas as well; in this case, he was also irresponsible with his relationship with you - even while you were concerned and caring and trying to help him. He's definitely in for a hard road in life if he keeps it up - which he will learn the hard way.

 

I'm glad you've broken up (even though I know it has to hurt) because you seem like a nice person and deserve better than an irresponsible man-boy who is ultimately just bringing negative factors into your life. I have a daughter in college, so she's probably near your age and I often tell her that the most important decisions she will make in life are the choices about the people she surrounds herself with and to make sure the people she chooses are the ones who will bring good things and joy to her days. It's hard sometimes because certain people are so likable but in the end you have to let them go nonetheless because they cannot or will not get their act together and just end up dragging you down.

 

I'm sorry your BF turned out to be such a bad apple.

Message 11 of 13
grinlikechelsea
Established Contributor

Re: Concerned with BFs Finances?


@Anonymous wrote:

@grinlikechelsea wrote:

@Anonymous wrote:

i would not share accounts nor live together until he gets his finanace education on check! 


It's a moot point now since we've broken up a week ago. It turns out that in addition to being awful at finances, he was cheating on me too. Oh well, at least it wasn't messy with living arrangements or finances.

 

Thank you all for the advice regardless. I appreciate it. 


I'm sorry to hear about the infidelity. That always hurts. Smiley Sad

 

The unfortunate thing about people who behave irresponsibly in one area is that it usually isn't limited to that one area. They tend to be irresponsible in other areas as well; in this case, he was also irresponsible with his relationship with you - even while you were concerned and caring and trying to help him. He's definitely in for a hard road in life if he keeps it up - which he will learn the hard way.

 

I'm glad you've broken up (even though I know it has to hurt) because you seem like a nice person and deserve better than an irresponsible man-boy who is ultimately just bringing negative factors into your life. I have a daughter in college, so she's probably near your age and I often tell her that the most important decisions she will make in life are the choices about the people she surrounds herself with and to make sure the people she chooses are the ones who will bring good things and joy to her days. It's hard sometimes because certain people are so likable but in the end you have to let them go nonetheless because they cannot or will not get their act together and just end up dragging you down.

 

I'm sorry your BF turned out to be such a bad apple.


Thank you, I appreciate your kind words. I guess with 20/20 hindsight, I could have seen that a lack of self-control would be in other areas of our relationship, but I obviously didn't imagine it at the time. However, it is something to consider going forward. As for him, the road ahead will definitely be rough. Even though I am still angry and hurt, I hope he realizes it before it is too late. I was one of the only things keeping his finances in order, so I'm sure that will become a mess soon enough.

 

I'm glad I'm out of the relationship too and I like the advice you gave your daughter. Cutting out my ex has reduced a lot of stress and negativity in my life, which has been very relieving to say the least. He may have turned out to be a bad apple, but I tried my best and that's what matters. I'm just going to keep working to make myself happy and see where life takes me. Thanks again. Smiley Happy

Message 12 of 13
Anonymous
Not applicable

Re: Concerned with BFs Finances?

You're quite welcome. I know you have a very limited support system there at school and the loss of your main "person" there must be tough for you. I'm glad my words helped you, even if I'm a total stranger that can't actually be there for you. I'll be thinking of you and I wish you nothing but the best. Smiley Happy

 

Marlena

Message 13 of 13
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