cancel
Showing results for 
Search instead for 
Did you mean: 

Credit Score and Dating....

tag
dodfire
Valued Contributor

Re: Credit Score and Dating....


@CreditScholar wrote:

@dodfire wrote:

I have to disagree...This is insane. What has the world come to? Years ago it was all the hype about basing relationships on "LOOKS" and now we are pulling credit reports?? Talk about a materialistic relationship!! WOW I would NEVER EVER want to have to support a woman like that!! 

I mean do we not take into account WHY this guy has bad credit??? Or is it now that if someone has poor credit you are less of a person? Life is full of its ups and downs and can affect ANYONE - let me tell you folks, when you start judging others based on such superficial things...be prepared to meet....KARMA!!! 


Completely disagree with this, and it's not about materialism. This isn't dating in your teens. If you're a woman who is say 25-30, having to deal with his crappy credit for the next 5-10 years makes things like starting a family (and having a place large enough to start one in) can be a deal-breaker. There's nothing shallow in wanting to be a mother who is able to provide certain things for her child.

 

She can't control what her husband does after they get married, but she can definitely have a good look beforehand and decide whether she wants to be a part of that. That's what intelligent people do. The stupid pretend it doesn't exist and therefore doesn't matter.


WAY out of context!!!!!

I am not implying that it does not matter at all. I agree that both partners must be on the same page and be compatible when it comes to finance and that both have to take issues like this serious, or you are right it is a ticking time bomb.

 

My point is this, how about discussing it with your "DATE" or potential partner?

Do not pass judgment until you know the facts.

 

In the OP it was given in the context of, as soon as she heard this news that all she could think of was getting home to take off her heels. And you are telling me that is not materialistic?

 

Lets use the same basic principle and but another spin on it. What if it was divorce? So, using the same line of thinking..... If you go on a date with someone and find out that they have been "divorced" then one could assume that they are terrible at relationships and should not be given a chance?

 

All of this just seems a little like the whole "Holier than Thou" mindset to me.

 

*8/10/13
Message 21 of 110
CreditScholar
Valued Contributor

Re: Credit Score and Dating....


@dodfire wrote:

@CreditScholar wrote:

@dodfire wrote:

I have to disagree...This is insane. What has the world come to? Years ago it was all the hype about basing relationships on "LOOKS" and now we are pulling credit reports?? Talk about a materialistic relationship!! WOW I would NEVER EVER want to have to support a woman like that!! 

I mean do we not take into account WHY this guy has bad credit??? Or is it now that if someone has poor credit you are less of a person? Life is full of its ups and downs and can affect ANYONE - let me tell you folks, when you start judging others based on such superficial things...be prepared to meet....KARMA!!! 


Completely disagree with this, and it's not about materialism. This isn't dating in your teens. If you're a woman who is say 25-30, having to deal with his crappy credit for the next 5-10 years makes things like starting a family (and having a place large enough to start one in) can be a deal-breaker. There's nothing shallow in wanting to be a mother who is able to provide certain things for her child.

 

She can't control what her husband does after they get married, but she can definitely have a good look beforehand and decide whether she wants to be a part of that. That's what intelligent people do. The stupid pretend it doesn't exist and therefore doesn't matter.


WAY out of context!!!!!

I am not implying that it does not matter at all. I agree that both partners must be on the same page and be compatible when it comes to finance and that both have to take issues like this serious, or you are right it is a ticking time bomb.

 

My point is this, how about discussing it with your "DATE" or potential partner?

Do not pass judgment until you know the facts.

 

In the OP it was given in the context of, as soon as she heard this news that all she could think of was getting home to take off her heels. And you are telling me that is not materialistic?

 

Lets use the same basic principle and but another spin on it. What if it was divorce? So, using the same line of thinking..... If you go on a date with someone and find out that they have been "divorced" then one could assume that they are terrible at relationships and should not be given a chance?

 

All of this just seems a little like the whole "Holier than Thou" mindset to me.

 


People have to make judgements with serious consequences with the best information available to them at the time. In this particular case, a poor credit history will take years to repair. If there was a quick fix, 90% of the people on these forums wouldn't be here.

 

Some people simply won't be willing to wait out those several years. It's a matter of timing, and in some cases being unwilling to accept someone else's baggage. He could have been at fault or maybe he wasn't, but if that's too long of a wait then his reasons and the subsequent discussion become irrelevant. It takes two people to make a deal, and in this case she's choosing to walk away. She's perfectly within her rights to do so.

 

 

EX 798, EQ 789, TU 784
American Express Platinum (NPSL) || Bank of America Privileges with Travel Rewards Visa Signature - $23,200 CL
Barclays American Airlines Aviator Red World Elite Mastercard - $20,000 CL || Chase IHG Rewards World Mastercard - $25,000 CL
Chase Sapphire Preferred Visa Signature - $12,700 CL || Chase United MileagePlus Club World Elite MasterCard - $26,500 CL
Citibank Hilton Reserve Visa Signature - $20,000 CL || J.P. Morgan Ritz Carlton Visa Signature - $23,500 CL
Message 22 of 110
dodfire
Valued Contributor

Re: Credit Score and Dating....


@CreditScholar wrote:

@dodfire wrote:

@CreditScholar wrote:

@dodfire wrote:

I have to disagree...This is insane. What has the world come to? Years ago it was all the hype about basing relationships on "LOOKS" and now we are pulling credit reports?? Talk about a materialistic relationship!! WOW I would NEVER EVER want to have to support a woman like that!! 

I mean do we not take into account WHY this guy has bad credit??? Or is it now that if someone has poor credit you are less of a person? Life is full of its ups and downs and can affect ANYONE - let me tell you folks, when you start judging others based on such superficial things...be prepared to meet....KARMA!!! 


Completely disagree with this, and it's not about materialism. This isn't dating in your teens. If you're a woman who is say 25-30, having to deal with his crappy credit for the next 5-10 years makes things like starting a family (and having a place large enough to start one in) can be a deal-breaker. There's nothing shallow in wanting to be a mother who is able to provide certain things for her child.

 

She can't control what her husband does after they get married, but she can definitely have a good look beforehand and decide whether she wants to be a part of that. That's what intelligent people do. The stupid pretend it doesn't exist and therefore doesn't matter.


WAY out of context!!!!!

I am not implying that it does not matter at all. I agree that both partners must be on the same page and be compatible when it comes to finance and that both have to take issues like this serious, or you are right it is a ticking time bomb.

 

My point is this, how about discussing it with your "DATE" or potential partner?

Do not pass judgment until you know the facts.

 

In the OP it was given in the context of, as soon as she heard this news that all she could think of was getting home to take off her heels. And you are telling me that is not materialistic?

 

Lets use the same basic principle and but another spin on it. What if it was divorce? So, using the same line of thinking..... If you go on a date with someone and find out that they have been "divorced" then one could assume that they are terrible at relationships and should not be given a chance?

 

All of this just seems a little like the whole "Holier than Thou" mindset to me.

 


People have to make judgements with serious consequences with the best information available to them at the time. In this particular case, a poor credit history will take years to repair. If there was a quick fix, 90% of the people on these forums wouldn't be here.

 

Some people simply won't be willing to wait out those several years. It's a matter of timing, and in some cases being unwilling to accept someone else's baggage. He could have been at fault or maybe he wasn't, but if that's too long of a wait then his reasons and the subsequent discussion become irrelevant. It takes two people to make a deal, and in this case she's choosing to walk away. She's perfectly within her rights to do so.

 

 



I will not disagree with you on that point.....

*8/10/13
Message 23 of 110
Leadberry
Established Contributor

Re: Credit Score and Dating....


@CreditScholar wrote:

@dodfire wrote:

@CreditScholar wrote:

@dodfire wrote:

I have to disagree...This is insane. What has the world come to? Years ago it was all the hype about basing relationships on "LOOKS" and now we are pulling credit reports?? Talk about a materialistic relationship!! WOW I would NEVER EVER want to have to support a woman like that!! 

I mean do we not take into account WHY this guy has bad credit??? Or is it now that if someone has poor credit you are less of a person? Life is full of its ups and downs and can affect ANYONE - let me tell you folks, when you start judging others based on such superficial things...be prepared to meet....KARMA!!! 


Completely disagree with this, and it's not about materialism. This isn't dating in your teens. If you're a woman who is say 25-30, having to deal with his crappy credit for the next 5-10 years makes things like starting a family (and having a place large enough to start one in) can be a deal-breaker. There's nothing shallow in wanting to be a mother who is able to provide certain things for her child.

 

She can't control what her husband does after they get married, but she can definitely have a good look beforehand and decide whether she wants to be a part of that. That's what intelligent people do. The stupid pretend it doesn't exist and therefore doesn't matter.


WAY out of context!!!!!

I am not implying that it does not matter at all. I agree that both partners must be on the same page and be compatible when it comes to finance and that both have to take issues like this serious, or you are right it is a ticking time bomb.

 

My point is this, how about discussing it with your "DATE" or potential partner?

Do not pass judgment until you know the facts.

 

In the OP it was given in the context of, as soon as she heard this news that all she could think of was getting home to take off her heels. And you are telling me that is not materialistic?

 

Lets use the same basic principle and but another spin on it. What if it was divorce? So, using the same line of thinking..... If you go on a date with someone and find out that they have been "divorced" then one could assume that they are terrible at relationships and should not be given a chance?

 

All of this just seems a little like the whole "Holier than Thou" mindset to me.

 


People have to make judgements with serious consequences with the best information available to them at the time. In this particular case, a poor credit history will take years to repair. If there was a quick fix, 90% of the people on these forums wouldn't be here.

 

Some people simply won't be willing to wait out those several years. It's a matter of timing, and in some cases being unwilling to accept someone else's baggage. He could have been at fault or maybe he wasn't, but if that's too long of a wait then his reasons and the subsequent discussion become irrelevant. It takes two people to make a deal, and in this case she's choosing to walk away. She's perfectly within her rights to do so.

 

 


While these posts may come across as callous, I wholeheartedly agree with CreditScholar.

   
FICO Scores 800+
Message 24 of 110
dodfire
Valued Contributor

Re: Credit Score and Dating....

Smiley Happy

SCORE:

Creditscholar - 1

dodfire - 0

 

No hard feelings here, Im just a little old fashion and think that relationship or no relationship we need to look deeper before passing judgment. Thats one of the problems with the world today.

But, very valid points that Creditscholar makes because another problem with todays world is those that do not manage their finances. 

*8/10/13
Message 25 of 110
eviLution
Established Contributor

Re: Credit Score and Dating....

That's because the government taught us that being in debt so we can provide for our families(buying allies) is okay. Smiley Happy


DCU Platinum: 4000 - Discover IT: 11000 - Walmart: 5000 - AMEX BCP: 18000 - Chase Freedom VS: 5000
in the garden since 1/24/14 - #GARDENSTRONG
Message 26 of 110
dodfire
Valued Contributor

Re: Credit Score and Dating....

Funny you picked up on that because I debated putting (ex: Our Gov't) at the end of my last post....haha

*8/10/13
Message 27 of 110
Leadberry
Established Contributor

Re: Credit Score and Dating....

I'm not saying we should pass judgment on someone as a whole based solely on a fleeting mention of the health of their finances; I believe people are far too complex to be categorized in such a manner.  I am saying, however, that when a person displays a chronic failure to take responsibility for their financial health, there are most likely other underlying problems that accompany such behavior.  As such, it is a perfectly valid reason to avoid entering a committed relationship with said person.  Obviously people change.  The question at hand is whether or not you would be willing to help bear that person's financial burdens, as well as any other baggage they possess.  The answer to this question will be different for every person and every situation.

   
FICO Scores 800+
Message 28 of 110
Smug
Established Contributor

Re: Credit Score and Dating....

I am old and will take what I can get, my credit could carry both of us if needed.
Experian® 808/Equifax® ?/TransUnion® 810
Baddies Experian® clean/Equifax® 1/TransUnion® Clean
Last CLI 6-13-2013
Total Credit $121,190.00
Goal 780!
Message 29 of 110
eviLution
Established Contributor

Re: Credit Score and Dating....


@Smug wrote:
I am old and will take what I can get, my credit could carry both of us if needed.

You ever play online pool at Jippii?


DCU Platinum: 4000 - Discover IT: 11000 - Walmart: 5000 - AMEX BCP: 18000 - Chase Freedom VS: 5000
in the garden since 1/24/14 - #GARDENSTRONG
Message 30 of 110
Advertiser Disclosure: The offers that appear on this site are from third party advertisers from whom FICO receives compensation.