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Joint debt

New Member

Joint debt

Hello all.  Im currently split from my wife, not divorced yet.  We sure no mutual bills accept on a home we purchased 2 years ago and the solar panels which we took a loan on.  Now we're seperate, haven't started the divorce process yet, yet still have these joint bills.  Home loan is a total of about 190,000 and the solar panels are 2 different loans in the amount of about 10,000 each.   She told me she's gonna file for bankruptcy in december which to my knowledge now puts the burden on me 100%.  Outside of this debt I have about 8,000 in personal debt, cards are maxed out minus my discover which im riding the line with. Im a small business owner with the company basically not even being operation right now,  currently working inconsistant off the books, which roughly gives me about 400 weekly. I know the mortgage gets paid on time monthly, but the solar panels are just not being paid.  Im trying to build back up my credit. Current monthly expenses are about $900.  What would be the first steps? i recently got my credit report which is how i got my totals on debt. All help is greatly appreciated.   

Message 1 of 7
6 REPLIES
Regular Contributor

Re: Joint debt

I had a very similar experience to yours with my last relationship and my biggest mistake was not consulting an attorney early enough.

 

My Ex-wife and I separated and then we eventually divorced. She then filed for BK, leaving the house to be foreclosed on that I had been making personal payments to her to make the mortgage and the CC bills that we both agreed upon. What started out as a mutual agreement eventually morphed into the divorce decree and that ended up a mess since she had a legal right to the home but quit making payments on it leaving me holding the bag in the end. I finally sat down with an attorney and he explained that what I had done in trying to be fair (in leaving her) was a very poor decision for my financial future.

 

He then recommended I consult with a BK attorney who helped come up with a plan of action that allowed me to not file bankruptcy. It was then a messy, tenuous 7+ year period of waiting that is now 6 months away from being completely over (I have one last CC that she had co-applied with in my name and defaulted on)

 

Lessons I learned are:

 

1. Being a nice guy is not always the best course of action

2. As much as I hate attorneys and the complicated poo-mire that our legal system is, saving a dime in the beginning cost me a quarter in the end. 

3. People will not always do as they promise even after 12 years of being with them. Trust but verify.

 

I'd consider the money you spend now on a good attorney as an investment for your future.

 

I'm sorry that you're in the position you're in but tread carefully at this point.

Message 2 of 7
Regular Contributor

Re: Joint debt

Your situation sounds similar to mine. I'm in the house though, so I have no choice but to pay the mortgage. I also just agreed to pay the joint bills just to hurry the divorce along. I made these choices because 1.) I want it to be done and over with and 2.) I can afford it (minor joint debt). I had to buckle down though and not throw away money on "wants".
It appears that finances may be an issue for you, so you may want to start inquiring with a few attorneys.
You WILL get through it though!!! Keep the faith!
Starting Score:6/8/16: EX 585, TU 551, EQ 574
Current Score: 11/19/17: EX 680, TU 674, EQ 693
Goal Score: 700


Available CL:$80,450
Message 3 of 7
New Member

Re: Joint debt

sorry to hear bro.  im in a different situation where my ex wife and kids are still in the house.  she doesnt plan on leaving anytime soon so i have no worries of losing the house, and its currently helping my score. we currently dont have any mutual agreement on the panels as neither of us are in the position to really make payments on them right now. i do believe i need to consult with a bk attorney because i definitly think i can bounce back easily.  especially with tax time round the corner. 

Message 4 of 7
New Member

Re: Joint debt

kudos to you on retaining the house ls. im definitly confident I can bounce back.  im in a situaiton where my bills are low right now. just need to generate income.  i believe by summer time I should be debt free minus these solar panels and mortgage

Message 5 of 7
Super Contributor

Re: Joint debt

IMHO  I would recommend monitoring your credit now or even freeze it to prevent ID theft.

12/08/2017 FICO: EQ 843 TU 849 EX 844
Message 6 of 7
Regular Contributor

Re: Joint debt

 


Moneyklutz wrote:

I had a very similar experience to yours with my last relationship and my biggest mistake was not consulting an attorney early enough.

 

My Ex-wife and I separated and then we eventually divorced. She then filed for BK, leaving the house to be foreclosed on that I had been making personal payments to her to make the mortgage and the CC bills that we both agreed upon. What started out as a mutual agreement eventually morphed into the divorce decree and that ended up a mess since she had a legal right to the home but quit making payments on it leaving me holding the bag in the end. I finally sat down with an attorney and he explained that what I had done in trying to be fair (in leaving her) was a very poor decision for my financial future.

 

He then recommended I consult with a BK attorney who helped come up with a plan of action that allowed me to not file bankruptcy. It was then a messy, tenuous 7+ year period of waiting that is now 6 months away from being completely over (I have one last CC that she had co-applied with in my name and defaulted on)

 

Lessons I learned are:

 

1. Being a nice guy is not always the best course of action

2. As much as I hate attorneys and the complicated poo-mire that our legal system is, saving a dime in the beginning cost me a quarter in the end. 

3. People will not always do as they promise even after 12 years of being with them. Trust but verify.

 

I'd consider the money you spend now on a good attorney as an investment for your future.

 

I'm sorry that you're in the position you're in but tread carefully at this point.


 

This is all so true. It's unfortunate, but once one realizes that they have to split, they have to financially treat the other party as their adversary... because that's what they have in fact legally become.

 

A lot of times whomever is first to get to the money, or get an attorney... will be the party that gets the better end of the deal.

 

Other times, one party plays the other for a fool, by pretending that they are still essentially working together.

 

The reason people split up is precisely because they cannot agree on how to go forward together. Therefore, the solution is to take what's yours, and let them figure out how to get theirs.

Message 7 of 7