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Contributor
Isaiah2990
Posts: 86
Registered: ‎04-28-2012
0

Re: Wedding debt..

I agree with you 100%..it should be the father of the bride's responsibility..not mines.

Starting Score: FAKO EQ 497 EX 516 TU 517 (4.28.12)
Current Score: FICO EQ 587 (9.29.13) TU (GECRB) 596 (2.19.13) EX (USAA) 482 (3.12.13)
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Senior Contributor
drkaje
Posts: 3,492
Registered: ‎07-25-2008
0

Re: Wedding debt..

You're the one getting married!! :smileyhappy:


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cassembler
Posts: 470
Registered: ‎02-07-2011
0

Re: Wedding debt..

Well, without really knowing any details, I'd say the best thing you can do is talk about it with your GF. After all, this is a great chance to see how well the two of you communicate about these sorts of things.


drkaje wrote:

You're the one getting married!! :smileyhappy:


At the end of the day, +1

"Credit is purely a cash flow tool. Thinking of credit as extra money you didn't have before makes it an EXPENSIVE cash flow tool."
Contributor
Isaiah2990
Posts: 86
Registered: ‎04-28-2012
0

Re: Wedding debt..

Me and her had the talk earlier..I explained that when we go into marriage that we will have other expenses to pay for (student loans, rent/mortgage, and utilities) and I told her I do not want to go into marriage paying off a loan..She says that since she is the first child and grand child her parents and parents are going to be more than willing to help pay for the wedding..she still said my contributions are still needed..she said she would want us to say money instead of take out loans.


Starting Score: FAKO EQ 497 EX 516 TU 517 (4.28.12)
Current Score: FICO EQ 587 (9.29.13) TU (GECRB) 596 (2.19.13) EX (USAA) 482 (3.12.13)
Goal Score: 700 all across the board!
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FrugalRican
Posts: 2,876
Registered: ‎02-02-2012
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Re: Wedding debt..

The stories I could tell.

 

My best friend just got married and he was convinced that he was doing everything the right way. He limited the budget for the wedding and gave up one concession... the wedding dress. They live in Puerto Rico (where there are PLENTY of beautiful dresses being sold) and she decided she wanted to come to New York to buy a wedding dress (just so she could brag she had a NY wedding dress). The dress cost him over 2K, plus the plane trip, plus additional expenses... The "dress" ended up costing him almost everything he had saved on the actual wedding/reception.

 

I already told my girlfriend that we are going small, conservative, family-type wedding.

 

I know that the day is all about "her", but in the end, you also have to be financially responsible. The worst thing anyone could do is overextend themselves and start out a life together in debt just because you wanted her to be happy for one day. And like others have stated, spending on a wedding while counting on the "windfall" of wedding money is a dangerous way to think. You could spend 15K easily and only get back 5.

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EQ FICO (01/16/2012): 656 - EQ FICO (02/16/2012): 743 - EQ (02/24/2012): 760 - EX (04/28/2012): 739 - GOAL 2013: 800+

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Senior Contributor
drkaje
Posts: 3,492
Registered: ‎07-25-2008
0

Re: Wedding debt..

@ FR,

 

Your buddy got played. :smileyhappy:


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Contributor
Isaiah2990
Posts: 86
Registered: ‎04-28-2012
0

Re: Wedding debt..


FrugalRican wrote:

The stories I could tell.

 

My best friend just got married and he was convinced that he was doing everything the right way. He limited the budget for the wedding and gave up one concession... the wedding dress. They live in Puerto Rico (where there are PLENTY of beautiful dresses being sold) and she decided she wanted to come to New York to buy a wedding dress (just so she could brag she had a NY wedding dress). The dress cost him over 2K, plus the plane trip, plus additional expenses... The "dress" ended up costing him almost everything he had saved on the actual wedding/reception.

 

I already told my girlfriend that we are going small, conservative, family-type wedding.

 

I know that the day is all about "her", but in the end, you also have to be financially responsible. The worst thing anyone could do is overextend themselves and start out a life together in debt just because you wanted her to be happy for one day. And like others have stated, spending on a wedding while counting on the "windfall" of wedding money is a dangerous way to think. You could spend 15K easily and only get back 5.


I'm definitely not trying to be that guy..at least me and her had "the talk" before I even plan on proposing..I have to get my finances in order first.


Starting Score: FAKO EQ 497 EX 516 TU 517 (4.28.12)
Current Score: FICO EQ 587 (9.29.13) TU (GECRB) 596 (2.19.13) EX (USAA) 482 (3.12.13)
Goal Score: 700 all across the board!
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FrugalRican
Posts: 2,876
Registered: ‎02-02-2012
0

Re: Wedding debt..


drkaje wrote:

@ FR,

 

Your buddy got played. :smileyhappy:



Yes, he did, and I told him so.

Even my DGF said: What the...

 

Because he was talking to us about he was being financially responsible, but we calculated the expenses with him and then it hit him...

The saddest thing was seeing his face once he realized what happened.

 

And then my DGF saw the wedding pictures. The dress was pretty bad. Thousands down the drain just so she could brag about a dress from NYC.

Follow my financial journey: http://www.frugalrican.com


EQ FICO (01/16/2012): 656 - EQ FICO (02/16/2012): 743 - EQ (02/24/2012): 760 - EX (04/28/2012): 739 - GOAL 2013: 800+

AMEX BCE (0/10K) --- BOA 1-2-3 (0/15.9K) --- Discover More (0/6K) --- Chase Freedom Visa (0/1.4K) -- Hyatt Visa Sign. (0/5.8K) -- Barclay's NFL Card (0/7.5K) -- Chase Sapphire Preferred (0/5K)

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FrugalRican
Posts: 2,876
Registered: ‎02-02-2012
0

Re: Wedding debt..


Isaiah2990 wrote:

I'm definitely not trying to be that guy..at least me and her had "the talk" before I even plan on proposing..I have to get my finances in order first.



Stick to the "talk", is what I'm gonna say. You sound like you are trying to do the right thing, good luck to you!

Follow my financial journey: http://www.frugalrican.com


EQ FICO (01/16/2012): 656 - EQ FICO (02/16/2012): 743 - EQ (02/24/2012): 760 - EX (04/28/2012): 739 - GOAL 2013: 800+

AMEX BCE (0/10K) --- BOA 1-2-3 (0/15.9K) --- Discover More (0/6K) --- Chase Freedom Visa (0/1.4K) -- Hyatt Visa Sign. (0/5.8K) -- Barclay's NFL Card (0/7.5K) -- Chase Sapphire Preferred (0/5K)

Frequent Contributor
Dadaluma83
Posts: 364
Registered: ‎08-23-2011
0

Re: Wedding debt..

I am currently single but hoping to find a girl that shares my frugal ways. My view on cars is never buy new, and never take out an auto loan. Get a respectable used car for 7-8k or even less if possible, and throw in a repair or two as needed and you are good to go.

 

I have the same view on a wedding. Why spend yourself to death? Me personally I would be happy with just spending a few hundred dollars as necessary, get married in the church with a handful of family and friends, then have a family cookout afterward to celebrate the big day. No expensive receptions or events. A nice little ceremony and cookout with family and friends will make me, and hopefully her, happy. After all the people you are around is what makes the day special, not how much "bling" you have.

 

If you save as much as possible and spend as little as possible on the wedding, then you can have a nice dream honeymoon vacation. Personally my dream honeymoon is spending a week in the australian outback.

FICO Scores: TU: 768 (Jan 2012), EQ: 755 (Jan 2012 Lender pull)

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