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When the person you're dating is a credit nightmare?

Established Contributor

Re: When the person you're dating is a credit nightmare?

Now that everyones given you their perspective, consider this...

 

I was almost, not as bad but almost the same way as your BF not too long ago myself. My fiance always lectured me over and over about how important credit was and blah blah blah, it went in one ear n out the other. But, just as your BF would do I would take her out all the time, buy things I didn't need and so on you get the picture.

 

To make a long story short, 2 years ago I decided to clean up my act and get serious. Sometimes it takes more than just 1 person's rants to really open your eyes. You need to go thru a real life story to see how important credit truly is. With that being said my fiance never put our relationship out on the burner, stuck it out and now she has a finacially stable fiance, credits far better than what it was and will continue to grow and one expensive rock on her finger.

 

Not saying your story will end up the same way, but question yourself do you love this guy? Sometimes life is a gamble, somtimes you win sometimes you lose. But the worst loss is not a credit abuser, the worst loss is losing someone special who in time could truly change. Just something to consider...

Message 21 of 68
Super Contributor

Re: When the person you're dating is a credit nightmare?

Love is blind. Remember you can only change "you." So... if you stay in the relationship plan on accepting him for who he is. Is change impossible? NO! But he has to want it as you can't do it for him.
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Message 22 of 68
Member

Re: When the person you're dating is a credit nightmare?

I didn't get a chance to read all the responses yet, but I wanted to say that I was once dating the same type of guy.  I married him.  Now he's my ex husband and I'm still rebuilding my credit from the financial nightmare.   It's a bigger sign of irresponsibility if he's not learning from his mistakes or trying to fix things.  I'll spare you all of the details, but let's just say it's NOT petty to think about this.

Message 23 of 68
Super Contributor

Re: When the person you're dating is a credit nightmare?

Well the moment you let money in credit come between you and the person you care about. its over. ooh well. should not matter. but some people have others priorities.


Message 24 of 68
New Visitor

Re: When the person you're dating is a credit nightmare?

Run as fast as you can in the other direction.

Message 25 of 68
Frequent Contributor

Re: When the person you're dating is a credit nightmare?

Run away before it's too late.  He's a waste of time.  The dirt doesn't get glovey, but the glove gets dirty.

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Message 26 of 68
Established Member

Re: When the person you're dating is a credit nightmare?

This guy sounds like a total loser. OP get out now while you can!! God forbid this guy gets you pregnant. I can't see him ponying up much to help support the kiddos. 

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Message 27 of 68
New Visitor

Re: When the person you're dating is a credit nightmare?

It has been over a year, but I hope things are going well.  More importantly I hope the situation you were in has improved significantly (either by dumping him OR making him change).  

 

I concur with everyone else on this board.  He is just irresponsible to the EXTREME and that affects all aspects of life.  

 

We were all young once and have made mistakes (we still do), but his credit nightmare will soon become your reality if you don't make some changes in that relationship.

Message 28 of 68
Established Contributor

Re: When the person you're dating is a credit nightmare?


Stralem wrote:

The problem isn't his credit.

 

The problem is that he's an irresponsible jackass.

 

...No offense.

 

If you marry him, all of his financial problems will become your financial problems, no differently than if you married a drug addict, an alcoholic, a chronic gambler, or an arsonist. And like you said, given his track record, good luck with buying a home or... much of anything, really. There's a reason finances are often cited as the reason for breakups and divorces.

 

You need to dump this guy unless he shapes up.


This x1000000000.

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Message 29 of 68
Established Contributor

Re: When the person you're dating is a credit nightmare?

Ok. So I have a little different perspective because I am dating someone who I am trying to help learn to take care of his own finances. Create a mint.com account for him, input all of his accounts, bills, investments, property. So he can really see it. So far my boyfriend has been extremely receptive, and genuinely relieved or happy or whatever, because I could see his finances were causing him real anxiety.

 

just try to help him help himself

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Message 30 of 68