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10-19-2013 11:37 PM
Well rent is one thing, but you have to factor in as well, who is paying for other parts of your life, e.g. food, toileteries, etc. I think the best thing is to openly talk about it and recognize who ever makes more will likely and should likely contribute more.
10-21-2013 03:19 PM
This is a tough one for me too! I have kids and he doesn't so i always get weird about him paying for my kids. Except for the fact that we have lived together for almost 3 years and out of that time he didn't work for a year and a half, the first year we were together he couldn't really afford to give me money because he was helping his parents so now here we are. He got his first good paycheck in over a year and went shopping for new Playstation games! URGHHHH, i was so mad!
I think I am going to take the approach of adding up our household expenses and dividing by number of people. That way I don't feel like he is paying for my kids. I shouldn't feel weird about it because I have paid his car insurance, cell phone bill and gave him free use of my vehicle when he hasn't had one. And now that he does he is still driving mine because his needs work done.
I love him but sometimes I think he never grew up past the age of 16. He (nor his entire family) have any idea what being financially responsible is. Drives me crazy!!!
10-21-2013 04:02 PM
Momma told me to start out like I could hold out ! I moved in with her paid all her bills, gave her my sports car.
Fast forward ........ I am a father of two and a grandfather as of four months ago.......
I am still paying for everything
10-29-2013 10:56 AM
I would say 50-50 if your salaries were comparable or even. But if you make a decent amount more than her and it wouldn't affect you paying a little more than that it what I would do. I would definitely sit down with her and talk it out and be honest with it, you never know, maybe she will say that she can afford it and wants to do the 50-50 split. If not then maybe you should do a 60-40% or 65-35% split since she did help you out a lot it sounds like when you were looking for a job. You two know your finances the best and that’s why sitting down and talking about it, I think, is your best option. At least to start. I remember when I was younger me and my best friend wanted to move out of our respected houses and he made more money than I did so he paid more and had me contribute what I could. We sat down and talked about it and came to an agreement on me paying X each month and him the rest. Since that was the case I helped keeping the place tidy and neat a little more just to help pick up my slack. I am sure you could work something out with your girlfriend and settle on a fair agreement.
Here's an article with some helpful tips for splitting rent duties: http://www.kiplinger.com/article/saving/T065-C006-S001-five-money-rules-for-moving-in-together.html Some of these might not be necessary if you have been together for a while or trust one another but some, like keeping your money separate, could help.
11-23-2013 01:05 AM
If you both made $1500 a month you wouldn't be getting a $1400 apartment. You are getting a more expensive apt than she can afford half of. Split it proportionately according to what you make.
11-25-2013 03:00 AM
I agree with compassion101. I have seen family members who were bf/gf at the time co sign car loans, where the guy got the car only due to the woman(my family members credit). His credit was shot, and he had not tried to change his behavior, and sure enough, the financially responsible co signer is caught at the end having to bail out that person.
I have lived with 1 gf, and it was awkward having the rent splitting discussion, as her taste and mine were about 500/mo apart. We finally did come to an agreement/settlement, but that was a precursor to me of things to come.
11-27-2013 11:49 AM
So what would be a fair split proportional to what we make? Is there a # we can agree on?
The good news is, since I posted this, we both actually got better jobs and make way more. I now officially make double she does. And to clarify, when I said she paid more than me monthly it was $50 more. I dont think it would be fair for me to pay $1000 and her $400 when we move out though..
11-29-2013 01:08 PM
I don't know that I agree with "if you make double, you should pay double". This is how I would look at it. Rent or a house payment shouldn't be more than 25% of a persons monthly net income or married couples combined monthly net income. Since she makes less than you, figure 25% of her monthly net income. If she were living alone, she wouldn't or shouldn't be paying more than that. Double that dollar amount, since you'll be adding at least that much. If that's enough to cover the $1400, I would say spilt it 50/50. If it's not, then you should be covering the rest of it. My guess is her monthly net income isn't $2800, so splitting it 50/50 isn't going to work. If that is the case, find a cheaper place to live or cover the rest of it.
In my opinion, it's more about whoever is making the lower monthly net income. If the person making more per month wants something more expensive than what the person with the lesser income can reasonably afford per month (25%), they should be making up the difference.
If I made 4K per month and my gf made 2K per month, we would be looking for something no more than 1K per month. If I wanted something that was 1500 per month, I would be paying the difference. If I was happy with spending 1K and she wanted to spend $1500, than she would need to start making more money.
12-12-2013 01:08 PM
When you're in a relationship as serious as yours, you've got to move beyond the "pay/do your fair share, split everything down the middle" mentality. When you sprain your left ankle, your right leg doesn't berate your left leg for not doing its fair share of the walking. It just picks up the slack and carries on for the good of them both because it knows that if it sprained its ankle, Left Leg would do the same for it. And clearly, your girlfriend has proven she would pick up your slack if need be.
My advice is, figure out how much money she needs to do what she needs to do, set that amount aside, and use the rest to put towards your guys' rent. It may be more or less than the income proportion some other forum members have suggested, which is a fine idea, but I think this way is the best way to go about this.