Be encouraged you won't only end up finding the losers...yeah they are out there, but there are still some good ones left. My DH and I swapped credit reports when we started seriously talking about marriage and it was his idea to do. Both of our credit was pretty bad, but he definately wanted to work on his and started doing so before we got married. I didn't have to badger or beg him to do it. He was irresponsible and ignorant about credit (like most of us initially) and when he found out how to make changes he did them.
Just want to say...trust me...there are good ones out there.
7/11/08: EQ: 635, TU: 658, EX: 607 10/10: TU 634, EQ 626, Ex 626 9/14/2012: TU 622, EQ 660 10/16/2012: TU 731, EQ 706 - finally on my way!
Hey Obsessed. My first husband (divorced his sorry ass in 2004 after 20 years) sounds a lot like the guy you just divorced. Twice he wanted to declare bankruptcy rather than pay off OUR debt. Lucky for me I didn't listen to him, so I had a good credit score to build a foundation on when I left him.
I remarried last year to a guy with a heart of gold and a less than stellar credit report. (Credit scores are NOT everything.) We met when he moved into the apartment below mine. I've never been happier and neither has he. And with time, his credit score has begun to rebound.
There ARE good guys out there, and it's definitely worth it to hold out for Mr. Right. Don't waste a single minute on a fellow once you realize he's not what he says he is. People aren't who they "say" they are. People are who their ACTIONS say they are. At least it looks like you've got the ability to listen to the actions.
Don't settle for less than what you deserve. It's MUCH better to be single than stuck with someone who pulls you down.
DH's FICOS: July '08 TU-661 / EQ-593 / EX-656 --> April '09 TU-730 / EQ-705 / EX-685
MY FICOS: July '08 TU-735 / EQ-727 / EX-767 --> April '09 TU-789 / EQ-774 / EX-767
Before I learned about all this new credit stuff I never really cared to look at my credit report until there was a need/problem. So when someone doesn't care about credit reports it could just mean that they have not yet been exposed to it yet. Credit is still a huge mystery to the rest of the country. We are a small but fast growing few with the new CRA education. I've learned now credit is a very important indicator to other personality trends.
There's caring about credit, as in pulling reports, learning your scores, cleaning stuff up, etc., and then there's honoring your debts: not writing hot checks; paying your bills when they come due, and making sacrifices to pay them if that's what it takes; not charging (borrowing) when you know perfectly well that you have no way of paying it off.
The former is just not being tuned into this stuff; the latter is a character problem. My feeling is that if someone is OK with cheating on their creditors, they might well be OK with cheating on me.
edit: cna't splel
Message Edited by haulingthescoreup on 07-14-200805:56 PM
* Credit is a wonderful servant, but a terrible master. * Who's the boss --you or your credit? FICO's: EQ 781 - TU 793 - EX 779 (from PSECU) - Done credit hunting; having fun with credit gardening. - EQ 590 on 5/14/2007