What would you do if someone banged on your door for help?

[Lel]

My wife and I were discussing a hypothetical situation: If she is at home with our two young kids and someone started frantically pounding on the door begging for help, what is the right thing to do?

Obviously, we want to help anyone in need, but there have been occasional instances in which home invaders have gotten access to homes using this ruse. My wife would be especially vulnerable with two kids to protect.

[Scamp]

Do NOT open that door!

Depending on what kind of help they're asking for, tell them THROUGH the closed, locked door that you're calling 911, and do so.

If it's less-dire help they're claiming they need, offer to call someone FOR them to help.

[jaybird201]

I'd only let them in if they met at least one of the following qualifications:

1.) I recognized them (Neighbor, friend, family member, etc.)

2.) They didn't appear to be a threat (Their age, their gender, how they were dressed, etc.)

   *In my opinion, I (A 20 year-old white guy that can usually be found wearing a Colbert Nation t-shirt or a volunteer t-shirt with sandals/sneakers) will have a better chance of being let inside someone's house in such an instance than someone else (Some 30 year-old guy with tattoos, an earring, sagged black jeans, maybe a wife beater or an over-sized t-shirt with a hat on). How you dress definitely gives off an impression whether you like it or not.

3.) If there was clearly an emergency (They were bleeding, a house down the street was on fire, a car was crashed outside, there was some guy laying in the street unconscious, etc.)

Basic rule of thumb though -- unless there are extenuating circumstances, I wouldn't let them in unless I could take them in a 1-on-1. So I'd say your wife shouldn't let anyone in unless there are extenuating circumstances (See above examples).

[FretlessMayhem]

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@jaybird201 wrote:

I'd only let them in if they met at least one of the following qualifications:

1.) I recognized them (Neighbor, friend, family member, etc.)

2.) They didn't appear to be a threat (Their age, their gender, how they were dressed, etc.)

   *In my opinion, I (A 20 year-old white guy that can usually be found wearing a Colbert Nation t-shirt or a volunteer t-shirt with sandals/sneakers) will have a better chance of being let inside someone's house in such an instance than someone else (Some 30 year-old guy with tattoos, an earring, sagged black jeans, maybe a wife beater or an over-sized t-shirt with a hat on). How you dress definitely gives off an impression whether you like it or not.

3.) If there was clearly an emergency (They were bleeding, a house down the street was on fire, a car was crashed outside, there was some guy laying in the street unconscious, etc.)

Basic rule of thumb though -- unless there are extenuating circumstances, I wouldn't let them in unless I could take them in a 1-on-1. So I'd say your wife shouldn't let anyone in unless there are extenuating circumstances (See above examples).

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The one on one thing is kinda tricky since they could have a knife or other weapon in their waistband.

[FretlessMayhem]

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@Lel wrote:
My wife and I were discussing a hypothetical situation: If she is at home with our two young kids and someone started frantically pounding on the door begging for help, what is the right thing to do?

Obviously, we want to help anyone in need, but there have been occasional instances in which home invaders have gotten access to homes using this ruse. My wife would be especially vulnerable with two kids to protect.

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The home invasion part via knock on the door can, and does happen. I agree with the second poster that you can shout through the door that you will call 911.

[Anonymous]

Calling 911 from inside my home here!!! Some of the most famous serial killers were nice harmless looking people.

[Anonymous]

Appearances can be deceiving. I wouldn't let someone in my front door just because he looks like Ward (or June) Cleaver. Remember Ted Bundy - he was always very nice-looking, and used the ruse of an arm in a cast to get women to let down their guard.

I'd offer to call 911 through the locked door, but wouldn't let anyone in. I have the added deterrent of two pit bulls to back me up.

[Anonymous]

Spot on, Desifink!

Serial killers (of which Ted Bundy was), come in two types**: "Organized" and "Disorganized."

(** Actually, there's also the "Disorganized-Organized" classification, too -- but they're more rare, IIRC)

The "Organized" type look just like the kinda guy you'd LOVE your daughter to marry (or marry yourself). Clean-cut, intelligent, personable. That's how they "fit in," evade detection and why they're so hard to catch.

The "Disorganized" type, such as Richard Ramirez (AKA, the Night Stalker), Richard Chase (AKA, the Vampire Killer) don't tend to care about their appearance and will look like the stereotypical "crazed psychopathic killer."

Unfortunately, the most "typical" is the Organized type. So that clean-cut, personable, guy wearing a nice clothes, etc, is more likely the serial killer type you'd encounter.

And FTR, Bundy was an eager, tireless, rape-crisis hotline volunteer. He spent oodles of hours volunteering in all sorts of community programs and projects. How else better to escape suspicion??? o_O

[Anonymous]

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@Lel wrote:
My wife and I were discussing a hypothetical situation: If she is at home with our two young kids and someone started frantically pounding on the door begging for help, what is the right thing to do?

Obviously, we want to help anyone in need, but there have been occasional instances in which home invaders have gotten access to homes using this ruse. My wife would be especially vulnerable with two kids to protect.

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I think the suggestion of yelling that you've called 911 through the door is a good suggestion.

Now, if I had SEEN someone being attacked who then knocked on my door, I'd probably let them in.

I remember all too well the story of Kitty Genovese from back in '64. She was brutally attacked in FULL view of several neighbors who did NOTHING. Didn't even call 911 until AFTER she was murdered. The poor woman screamed her head off, and when several neighbors' lights went "on" in reaction, it drove the attacker away (briefly). When he saw that no one was forthcoming in helping her, and that no one had called the police, he returned about 10 minutes later and murdered her.

That story disgusted me to my toes. So if I knew that someone was in danger of that sort (a preponderance of the evidence towards their needing help, let's say), you betcha I'd let them in. I'd not be able to live with myself if I didn't.

[katecrime]

tell them, through the door, my husband is calling 911 from the gun room.  cops should be here in a sec