Established Contributor
aussiesareforever
Posts: 741
Registered: ‎10-04-2010
Re: Boyfriend wants to sign up for utility - gets hit with security fees

 

An internet provider in my personal estimation, is a pretty low risk. I mean, if he defaults for like 2 months, it be cancelled and you would have at the most, what a 300 dollar bill that isn't even reported unless it goes to collections.. and GW gesture can mean the world to someone who is struggling, take it from someone who has slept in his car for weeks at a time. I NEEDED someone like her, at the time she came around. Could I have done it without? I am unsure to be honest, but being with her added to the motivation, and not letting her down added to the motivation to get everything straightened up.

 

I think sometimes having an intricate knowledge of how FICO works can be an albatross.. I'll find myself making decisions for a three digit third party private score, than making the right life decisions, even if it means jeopordizing my current financial makeup or my FICO score. I think quite a few too many people obsess over their credit, me included now.

 

-scott



I disagree with this based on personal experience. If her BF "forgets" to let her know he hasn't paid the bill, she will have no idea for potentially months or years- when the bill finally makes its way to collections. That $300 bill will multiply significantly when late fees and finance charges are added on and can become significantly more depending on when it finally makes it to a collection company. She will also then have multiple lates and a collection record to try to GW.

In these times, it has become increasingly difficult to co-sign an account for someone we "love" and/or "trust". Personally I would see if the BF can find a cheaper alternative or have him charge the $450 on the OP's credit card and pay it back over time. The OP will have better control of that than an utility bill!!!

BK in 2008, after making very stupid financial decisions.

Barclay's Apple Financing Card ($6400) --- Capital One Quicksilver ($10,000)---GEMB CareCredit ($5700) --- AUFCU ($10000)--- Walmart ($5000)

FICO Scores: TU 735 EQ 709 EX 740 (Feb 2013, all pulled by lender)

Established Contributor
compassion101
Posts: 623
Registered: ‎06-06-2012
Re: Boyfriend wants to sign up for utility - gets hit with security fees

Haven't read past the first 10 posts, but many companies will wave/lower deposits if he signs up for automatic payments, which he can do with a credit card or debit card/bank account. Did he ask about that?

 

Also even if they don't wave the fee, if you really feel compeled to co-sign then at the very least sign up for the automatic payments and have him send the payments to you every month so at least you control it. 

Frequent Contributor
kimmiller112
Posts: 468
Registered: ‎04-09-2012
Re: Boyfriend wants to sign up for utility - gets hit with security fees

You say that both of you had financial problems in the past.  You managed to work to fix those problems and seem to be doing well from that stand point.  I understand that you have him as an AU on one card that he has in his possession with a $500 limit.  What is it with the "we" stuff - like "we" need to check his CRs?  You are both in your 30's.  Isn't it time for him to take financial responsibility on his own?  If you can work on fixing your credit, then he should be able to (on his own), without having to be added as AU or without him needing someone to get his utilities for him.  Unless he gets his act straight very quickly, I'd be very careful letting him move in with you (after he has had a chance to live on his own, as you say).  He really needs to start establishing credit on his own.

Barclays USAir World MC $8300 - DCU $7500 - USAA World MC $7000 - PayPal Extras MC (GE) $5500 - Chase Saphire Preferred $5000 - Discover It $5000 - Barclays Sallie May $2700 - Chase Freedom $1000 - Capital One $8500 (business) - store cards ranging from $500-$9500
Regular Contributor
honeybunnygal
Posts: 162
Registered: ‎03-30-2008
Re: Boyfriend wants to sign up for utility - gets hit with security fees

compassion101 wrote:

Haven't read past the first 10 posts, but many companies will wave/lower deposits if he signs up for automatic payments, which he can do with a credit card or debit card/bank account. Did he ask about that?

 


He hasn't looked into automatic payments, as far as I am aware. He is going to further investigate cheaper/slim-lined alternatives as far as providers and packages. The only issue is that there aren't a lot of providers/options for his area.

 

Hard work & patience can go a long way!
8/2009 (myFICO): TU - 599, EQ - 656
7/23/2010 (LO pull): TU - 738, EQ - 801, EX - 785
4/12/2012 (myFICO): TU -778, EQ - 791
Regular Contributor
honeybunnygal
Posts: 162
Registered: ‎03-30-2008
Re: Boyfriend wants to sign up for utility - gets hit with security fees

kimmiller112 wrote:

You say that both of you had financial problems in the past.  You managed to work to fix those problems and seem to be doing well from that stand point.  I understand that you have him as an AU on one card that he has in his possession with a $500 limit.  What is it with the "we" stuff - like "we" need to check his CRs?  You are both in your 30's.  Isn't it time for him to take financial responsibility on his own?  If you can work on fixing your credit, then he should be able to (on his own), without having to be added as AU or without him needing someone to get his utilities for him.  Unless he gets his act straight very quickly, I'd be very careful letting him move in with you (after he has had a chance to live on his own, as you say).  He really needs to start establishing credit on his own.


Honestly? Even if his credit reports were stellar, I would STILL feel the need to see his reports as part of moving on in our relationship. I think that, in this day and age, it is only fair to have a clear view of what you're getting into when going forward in a relationship.

 

As far as the AU step, I did the very same thing when rebuilding. I was added to my mom's AU card when I first started rebuilding. I then started DV'ing, GW'ing, and taking other steps (including going to court) to clean up items that were already on my report. I also applied for & got a couple starter cards (which I still have, for now at least) to establish credit on my own.

 

I don't really view what I did back then differently from how I'm trying to help him now.

Hard work & patience can go a long way!
8/2009 (myFICO): TU - 599, EQ - 656
7/23/2010 (LO pull): TU - 738, EQ - 801, EX - 785
4/12/2012 (myFICO): TU -778, EQ - 791
Frequent Contributor
kimmiller112
Posts: 468
Registered: ‎04-09-2012
Re: Boyfriend wants to sign up for utility - gets hit with security fees

honeybunnygal wrote:

kimmiller112 wrote:

You say that both of you had financial problems in the past.  You managed to work to fix those problems and seem to be doing well from that stand point.  I understand that you have him as an AU on one card that he has in his possession with a $500 limit.  What is it with the "we" stuff - like "we" need to check his CRs?  You are both in your 30's.  Isn't it time for him to take financial responsibility on his own?  If you can work on fixing your credit, then he should be able to (on his own), without having to be added as AU or without him needing someone to get his utilities for him.  Unless he gets his act straight very quickly, I'd be very careful letting him move in with you (after he has had a chance to live on his own, as you say).  He really needs to start establishing credit on his own.


Honestly? Even if his credit reports were stellar, I would STILL feel the need to see his reports as part of moving on in our relationship. I think that, in this day and age, it is only fair to have a clear view of what you're getting into when going forward in a relationship.

 

As far as the AU step, I did the very same thing when rebuilding. I was added to my mom's AU card when I first started rebuilding. I then started DV'ing, GW'ing, and taking other steps (including going to court) to clean up items that were already on my report. I also applied for & got a couple starter cards (which I still have, for now at least) to establish credit on my own.

 

I don't really view what I did back then differently from how I'm trying to help him now.

 

 


To look at his report is a lot different than saying "we" need to check his report.  Maybe it was the way you worded everything, but the way I was taking it was that you were going to do it for him and that he isn't really even trying to help himself.  It really does sound like he needs to take more initiative in fixing/taking care of his credit and finances, especially if he wasn't very happy with you not helping with the utility security deposit.  Yes, I agree that in a relationship both people need to see where each of them is standing with regards to credit and spending habits. 

 

A parent adding a child on as an AU is one thing but to do it with a boyfriend is another.  Boyfriends come and go but parents stick around (in most cases anyways).  He is living on his own so that he has the experience of living on his own (let's forget the fact that he is over 30), yet he can't afford the down payment for a utility, so he wants you to get service in your name instead.  He needs to pull his own reports and start taking the steps necessary to get into a better situation where he doesn't have to count on co-signers or deposits for utilities, especially if this is someone you will be eventually living with and/or marrying.

Barclays USAir World MC $8300 - DCU $7500 - USAA World MC $7000 - PayPal Extras MC (GE) $5500 - Chase Saphire Preferred $5000 - Discover It $5000 - Barclays Sallie May $2700 - Chase Freedom $1000 - Capital One $8500 (business) - store cards ranging from $500-$9500
Regular Contributor
honeybunnygal
Posts: 162
Registered: ‎03-30-2008
Re: Boyfriend wants to sign up for utility - gets hit with security fees

kimmiller112 wrote:

honeybunnygal wrote:

kimmiller112 wrote:

You say that both of you had financial problems in the past.  You managed to work to fix those problems and seem to be doing well from that stand point.  I understand that you have him as an AU on one card that he has in his possession with a $500 limit.  What is it with the "we" stuff - like "we" need to check his CRs?  You are both in your 30's.  Isn't it time for him to take financial responsibility on his own?  If you can work on fixing your credit, then he should be able to (on his own), without having to be added as AU or without him needing someone to get his utilities for him.  Unless he gets his act straight very quickly, I'd be very careful letting him move in with you (after he has had a chance to live on his own, as you say).  He really needs to start establishing credit on his own.


Honestly? Even if his credit reports were stellar, I would STILL feel the need to see his reports as part of moving on in our relationship. I think that, in this day and age, it is only fair to have a clear view of what you're getting into when going forward in a relationship.

 

As far as the AU step, I did the very same thing when rebuilding. I was added to my mom's AU card when I first started rebuilding. I then started DV'ing, GW'ing, and taking other steps (including going to court) to clean up items that were already on my report. I also applied for & got a couple starter cards (which I still have, for now at least) to establish credit on my own.

 

I don't really view what I did back then differently from how I'm trying to help him now.

 

 


To look at his report is a lot different than saying "we" need to check his report.  Maybe it was the way you worded everything, but the way I was taking it was that you were going to do it for him and that he isn't really even trying to help himself.  It really does sound like he needs to take more initiative in fixing/taking care of his credit and finances, especially if he wasn't very happy with you not helping with the utility security deposit.  Yes, I agree that in a relationship both people need to see where each of them is standing with regards to credit and spending habits. 

 

A parent adding a child on as an AU is one thing but to do it with a boyfriend is another.  Boyfriends come and go but parents stick around (in most cases anyways).  He is living on his own so that he has the experience of living on his own (let's forget the fact that he is over 30), yet he can't afford the down payment for a utility, so he wants you to get service in your name instead.  He needs to pull his own reports and start taking the steps necessary to get into a better situation where he doesn't have to count on co-signers or deposits for utilities, especially if this is someone you will be eventually living with and/or marrying.


Nononononono...this is HIS responsibility to deal with. I will HELP with the process and provide my input & experience...but I already "served my time," as it were. :smileytongue:

 

He's beginning to FULLY understand the impact of having good vs. bad credit. He has goals in mind and is ready to work towards them.

Hard work & patience can go a long way!
8/2009 (myFICO): TU - 599, EQ - 656
7/23/2010 (LO pull): TU - 738, EQ - 801, EX - 785
4/12/2012 (myFICO): TU -778, EQ - 791
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FrugalRican
Posts: 2,876
Registered: ‎02-02-2012
Re: Boyfriend wants to sign up for utility - gets hit with security fees

Sometimes all it takes to course correct is a swift kick in the posterior.

Had she not taken her stance, he probably wouldn't have seen the bigger picture. Her best bet was to NOT enable him with the utilities.

 

But, we can't always take a lack of knowledge and mistake it for malice.

Like many others, he probably really didn't have a clue about credit, how it worked, how far it extends and the total effects of it. Now, he knows. And knowing is half the battle. The other half is paying on time.

Follow my financial journey: http://www.frugalrican.com


EQ FICO (01/16/2012): 656 - EQ FICO (02/16/2012): 743 - EQ (02/24/2012): 760 - EX (04/28/2012): 739 - GOAL 2013: 800+

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Regular Contributor
honeybunnygal
Posts: 162
Registered: ‎03-30-2008
Re: Boyfriend wants to sign up for utility - gets hit with security fees

FrugalRican wrote:

Sometimes all it takes to course correct is a swift kick in the posterior.

Had she not taken her stance, he probably wouldn't have seen the bigger picture. Her best bet was to NOT enable him with the utilities.

 

But, we can't always take a lack of knowledge and mistake it for malice.

Like many others, he probably really didn't have a clue about credit, how it worked, how far it extends and the total effects of it. Now, he knows. And knowing is half the battle. The other half is paying on time.


I totally agree. Since this has come up, we've been having healthy, constructive dialogue regarding finances. It is the first time he's really seen how much of a stickler I am regarding PIF'ing/avoiding interest whenever possible. I explained how I am paying extra on my auto loans to get each one paid off a year early & minimize interest paid. How I am paying less for a newer car simply because of credit improvement (financing at 8.45% vs. 4.46%). How my newer car payment is less than his older one.

 

I am actually glad this all came up. It was much needed. :smileyhappy:

Hard work & patience can go a long way!
8/2009 (myFICO): TU - 599, EQ - 656
7/23/2010 (LO pull): TU - 738, EQ - 801, EX - 785
4/12/2012 (myFICO): TU -778, EQ - 791
Established Contributor
westo12
Posts: 579
Registered: ‎07-20-2008
Re: Boyfriend wants to sign up for utility - gets hit with security fees
[ Edited ]

drkaje wrote:

oracles wrote:

Stand by your man, but stand by your credit first.

 

Dont be no fool, he will survive


You can always find another man. It takes 7 years for a late payment to fall off, LOL!


HA!! Truer words have never been spoken lol.  I wouldn't personally ever allow anyone besides a child to be an AU on one of my cards/accounts/util/etc.  Every point I have, and lost, and gained again, I EARNED - with blood, sweat, tears, AND day after day after...lol.  Oh and with the help of Myfico.com.   I have a long way to go, but I like how OP suggested her BF come here.  That was a nice way of saying Mod Cut lol.

 

I look at a man with bad credit thinking, I already have a child, I do not plan on raising a man "financially".  


 

Please keep your words g-rated - MarineVietVet, myFICO moderator

2014 Starting-618, current TU612 (TU 10/6) / Ending Goal score: 720 / 27 Positive TLs / 1 Negative: Unpaid $312 med CA placed 2010 / reported Install Bal/Lim: 25027/36512 | reported Revolving Bal/Lim: 12011/23382=51%util

**IN the garden until I get some auto CLI's on major accts**