Senior Contributor
Wolf3
Posts: 3,197
Registered: ‎01-24-2010
Re: Turning brother in for CC fraud

LS2982 wrote:
It may not have been in his post but ultimately that is what will happen if he doesn't report it as fraud. It is what it is.



If the CC payments are made, nothing happens.

Established Contributor
compassion101
Posts: 642
Registered: ‎06-06-2012
Re: Turning brother in for CC fraud

I think there are alot of options here in between the extremes of a) letting him get away with it with no consequences (which would be bad in probably all circumstances) and b) turning him into the police (which would be bad in many circumstances).

 

We really don't have much info to go on here to form a solid opinion. Age, type of relationship, parents in the picture, income potential, history of incidents, how he acquired info, etc.

 

I certainly wouldn't turn in a relative or friend even without confronting them first, asking when/why/how they did it, asking what their plan is to make good on it, etc.

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JPersat
Posts: 299
Registered: ‎05-28-2012
Re: Turning brother in for CC fraud
First off, if you are unable or unwilling to pay for these bills or have your brother pay them back(get something in writing!!!), call the credit card companies and possibly the police, if you want to pursue legal action.

Second...make damn sure your weasel brother or anyone else can't get your info ever again.

Third, do what you believe is best for you and your family.

Good luck.

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Sweets8E
Posts: 262
Registered: ‎03-07-2009
Re: Turning brother in for CC fraud

My brother did the same thing to me a couple of years ago. He got two credit cards in my name and ran them up. I discovered this one day after pulling my credit reports. I immediately disputed them and reported that they were fraudulently obtained. I struggled with the decision to report him and ultimately, I did not. The credit card companies closed the accounts and removed them from my credit reports. This also triggered a fraud alert to be placed on all three by the bureaus without me needing to ask them to do so.

 

Unfortunately, my brother's poor judgment did not stop there. Shortly after all of that, he stole my car and went missing with it for weeks until the police caught up with him. At that point, he was arrested. But, my mother bailed him out and two months after that, he beat her up, stole her purse, and her car and went missing again. If I remember right, he was arrested for that too. She allowed him to come home after that. But a few months later, it was discovered that he had broken in and entered someone else's house. This is what ultimately landed him in jail for just under two years. He is now out and on probation for the next 12 years. I'll add that he was then diagnosed as bipolar/schizophrenic.

 

I said all that to say this...I know what it's like to struggle with the decision to turn in a relative for wrong doing. But even in situations where the decision is made to do nothing at all on your part, if your relative gets desperate enough, their wrong doing won't stop with you or your family members, they will do it to someone else too and the outcome would still be adverse and result in jail time. What you do is totally up to you, but your brother's fait is in his own hands. You won't be able to rescue him all the time or monitor what he does to others day in and day out.


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kobe2012
Posts: 697
Registered: ‎03-16-2012
Re: Turning brother in for CC fraud

RyVision wrote:

Frankly, over 6 grand (unless we were both flat broke) I wouldn't put my brother in jail along with it's horrible treatment and the effect it would have on him the rest of his life.  I'd face him like a man and tell him the accounts have been closed and ask how he's going to pay me back before I ever considered doing that to him.  Blood is still thicker than money.   I for one can replace money, I can NOT however replace a brother.

 

I think a lot of you are talking through your hats on this one!

 

I would put a freeze on my credit however first thing though regardless.

 

I'll tell you one thing for a fact, no matter what you think of your brother now, he will only come out of the prison system a much worse person and very resentful of you for life, you will no longer have that brother.  Think about that before you listen to these "OH I GOT COJONES" blowhards.  These people MAY watch a little too much "Doctor" Phil at times............


+1


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Contributor
EmpressLuv
Posts: 84
Registered: ‎08-29-2012
Re: Turning brother in for CC fraud

That happened to me some years ago with a family member..when i called the credit card company to notify them, they asked me for my cousin's information and coincidentally she was there while I was on the phone with the company, I just handed the phone to her, they gave her the options like we can press charges or we can put the account in your name and u pay it.  She agreed to let them put the account in her name, she didnt get the actual card though, just the bills to pay them...they reported it as a new account on her credit report and took it off my credit report and as far as I know, she paid them off. 

 

So hopefully it works out this smoothly for you, good luck!

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RyVision
Posts: 1,346
Registered: ‎04-15-2011
Re: Turning brother in for CC fraud

There is one thing this thread is proving about itself and us posting to it.   We all view this issue from different assumptions and perspectives.   I think those of us that have been here for some time can agree (lurking before joining included) that we tend to agree about 80% of the time LOL.  That is when it comes to things we share all the facts and info on. 

 

Now as for this.  We  have a perspective from a poster (Sweets8E) who's brother went beyond belief in law and family bond breaking, due to a serious mental illness (sadly that wasn't known before any of the issues happened, none of those things may have occurred if that had been the case).  Sweets, you and your family have my deepest sympathy for what you all went through and I hope your brothers illness is being treated effectively now and maybe he's more the person he should have been.

 

Then we have EmpressLuv's situation that went amazingly smooth, that was no doubt some time ago and very unlikely to be allowed by current rules.  That situation was about as good of an outcome as one could hope for (though the cousin's credit would have had to been seen as able to take on the debt or I doubt it would have been allowed even then).

 

In my case, yes I have had something similar happen, but never identity theft, it was a much smaller scale and many life experiences (I'm older, wiser and have more experience!  Yes, that is a twist on a movie line and a bit of humor to add to this dismal thread).   Years ago a young family member took one of my cars while I wasn't home, went joyriding I guess.  I came home, noticed some things, found him and had a little chat.  It went something like this:  "I'm glad you were able to find a comfortable driving position with the seat while driving my car, oh, if you made and spare keys, you can give them to me now. He replied "what?!"  I answered with a smile: First, the seat and steering wheel are so far from my usual arrangement that I'd have to have major surgery to drive the car the way you left them positioned. You also forgot to sweep away the tracks of those shoes you usually wear that you left around the drivers side of the car (I never wore shoes like that). If you had any keys copied you need to give them to me now, and you also owe me half a tank of gas. Be glad you didn't damage it and hopefully didn't break any laws.  He hung his head and said he was sorry and that he did take the car but didn't abuse it. He couldn't believe I could find out, I told him he forgot who he was dealing with and should have known I'd know.  I told him he could pay off the gas by doing work around the place or by cash and if the car ever took a drive again wihout me knowing, I'd report it as stolen and the law would take it from there. He understood.

 

Later on, I allowed him to stay at my house and I'd have to travel for work sometimes for a couple weeks at  a time.  I came home once to find all the change gone from an antique cooking type crock (about big enough to cook a large chicken in I'd guess).  I would usually just throw my change in there as a place to put it, it was full of coins (probably several hundred dollars worth).  I went to throw change in it and the lid came apart, it was broken in half, the change was also gone and replaced with beer caps........  I was very PO'd.  Not so much about the money, but that the lid was broken (I have never seen one to replace it). I told him he had the rest of the week to find somewhere else to stay as I was changing the locks and it'd be a long time before he won back my trust.  He told me he'd pay me back, I told him it wasn't the money, it was that he broke the lid and my trust, and somewhat insulted me by replacing change with beer caps..... He has since made some minor mistakes in life, he knows what advice I'll give if he asks and we're still very close as fences have pretty much mended but I never forget (his friends have told me he'd rather deal with the law than betray me again as he sees me as his rock after his turbulent childhood).  He's not the only younger relative to find out I can be a brick wall in some ways.  Oddly enough, they all respect me, no cops involved and they've all "grown up" since.

 

This is why I say I'd if it were my brother, I'd face him like a man and ask him just how he's going to repay the 6 grand and win back my trust and remain my brother.  That's MY perspective.  There are countless things none of us know of that situation so it's hard to give anything other than our own (varied) knee jerk response (this is why it's not easy being a Judge, just ask one, if such responses were text book, a computer could do it, think of it as never getting a manual review).

 

The OP needs to take a lot into consideration before he decides the action he feels comfortable with (now and forever).  Look at all we've said here and how he sees it in real life, only he can figure out the best course of action as far as his family, money and future of both are concerned.  But remember, this is a federal offense, which means federal prison, and the feds don't play nice and they don't tend to take family relationships into consideration.

 

I can only hope we all have been helpful to the OP to make the decision that's right for him and the entire situation.

Senior Contributor
drkaje
Posts: 3,491
Registered: ‎07-25-2008
Re: Turning brother in for CC fraud

He's not gonna learn the lesson being babied. I'm totally fine with someone saying "I'd rather have my brother out of jail than the money" but it's really kind of silly to think we can help someone see the error of their ways without being specifically trained to do so.

 

I feel for OP but if he doesn't have $6K laying around it's time to file a police report.


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bobebob
Posts: 260
Registered: ‎08-14-2011
Re: Turning brother in for CC fraud

I can't speak to the OP's situration, but if one of my brothers made the conscious decision to fraudulently open accounts in my name I would fight the fraud as hard as I could until it was completely removed from my record and let the CCC's and legal system sort him out.

 

It wasn't a simple mistake, it was a decision he made to defraud a family member. IMO he doesn't deserve any different consideration than a stranger doing the same thing.

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Valued Contributor
Dustink
Posts: 3,097
Registered: ‎10-02-2012
Re: Turning brother in for CC fraud
[ Edited ]

RyVision wrote:

Frankly, over 6 grand (unless we were both flat broke) I wouldn't put my brother in jail along with it's horrible treatment and the effect it would have on him the rest of his life.  I'd face him like a man and tell him the accounts have been closed and ask how he's going to pay me back before I ever considered doing that to him.  Blood is still thicker than money.   I for one can replace money, I can NOT however replace a brother.

 

I think a lot of you are talking through your hats on this one!

 

I would put a freeze on my credit however first thing though regardless.

 

I'll tell you one thing for a fact, no matter what you think of your brother now, he will only come out of the prison system a much worse person and very resentful of you for life, you will no longer have that brother.  Think about that before you listen to these "OH I GOT COJONES" blowhards.  These people MAY watch a little too much "Doctor" Phil at times............


+1, well sorta

 

Have him pay the debts. Have him sell everything he owns to start paying you back.

 

If he isn't willing to pay, then I would start thinking about reporting him.

 

 

I personally would let my brother max every one of my credit cards if he was in a situation that required such action. Doing so without permission is another story completely, but if you parents or brother are willing to make you whole again. I would let it go.

 

Also, very well put RyVision.

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