Established Contributor
Posts: 855
Registered: ‎06-29-2010
Re: My wife is making my financial life miserable

IOBA wrote:

CC - here's another perspective...  (from my DH)


She hasn't completed high school.  You are nearly finished earning your PhD.


The kids are in school now, growing up, and will someday leave.  


Then what does she have??  A husband who is much better educated than she is.  Kids who have left home.  She will be alone, without you and without the kids.   Her own insecurities are playing out over the one thing she has control over -- money and how she spends it.


Building off this, is there a chance DW is overspending for attention from you?


You mentioned school, plus a full time and two part-time jobs (though I guess school could have been one of those "jobs"). I'm guessing that you come home tired, and your three kids vie for your attention. There's a chance DW is acting subconsiously out of the desire to get your undivided attention.


Maybe in the back of her mind, she knows that if she buys something (or a lot of things) that she is not supposed to that she will get the extra attention she wants from you -- even if it is negative in nature.