topic Re: Need advice regarding credit cards with death of the card holder UPDATE in General Credit Topics

Need advice regarding credit cards with death of the card holder

Jnbmom — Thu, 29 Nov 2018 20:37:22 GMT

My mother passed away this past saturday, although she has not been well for quite sometime, it has been a very hard loss.

She has around 6 cards currently with balances, she has zero assets and does not have any estate or any money left.

I need to know how to handle this correctly? Do I just call the credit card companies and notify them of her passing? I know I need to close her accounts of course, do I them tell them there was no estate, do they just close them and then do I send a copy of her DC? She had a very small life insurance policy which is barely covering her funeral expenses, so there really is nothing left to pay off this debt.

Thank you

Re: Need advice regarding credit cards with death of the card holder

Pikaboo-icu — Thu, 29 Nov 2018 20:57:57 GMT

I'm so very sorry for your loss.

Other than a child or spouse, losing your mum is the hardest. I'm sincerely sorry.

In dealing with this a few years ago, when my father-in-law passed, most will accept the DC and write it off.

If you encounter any difficult lenders, there's a process of publishing in the newspaper that can be utilized.

I would do a google search for any details/questions as that was quite helpful when I've dealt with similar issues.

It's quite sad you have to deal with this during your grieving process.

Many thoughts, prayers, love and big HUG!

So sorry.

https://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/i-am-mothers-only-surviving-heir-do-i-pay-debts.html

Re: Need advice regarding credit cards with death of the card holder

Pikaboo-icu — Thu, 29 Nov 2018 21:00:27 GMT

This is another decent resource..

https://www.debtcollectionanswers.com/deceased-persons-debt.html

So sorry this falls on you to deal with.. <3

Re: Need advice regarding credit cards with death of the card holder

Jnbmom — Thu, 29 Nov 2018 21:02:26 GMT

Thank you so much for the kind words, yes I have taken care of my mom for the past 6 years and I feel very lost as she was such a big part of my life everyday.

Re: Need advice regarding credit cards with death of the card holder

Pikaboo-icu — Thu, 29 Nov 2018 21:07:19 GMT

@Jnbmom wrote:
Thank you so much for the kind words, yes I have taken care of my mom for the past 6 years and I feel very lost as she was such a big part of my life everyday.

Wow you're my soul sister..

My mom moved in with me 6 years ago, in Oct.

I've been her caregiver and dealt with all of her finances etc... I'm staring down the barrel of this eventually so I have a good idea of what you're going through.

Hang in there- and please find somebody to lean on.. You need to allow yourself to lean on somebody else when the going gets tough.

Re: Need advice regarding credit cards with death of the card holder

Jnbmom — Thu, 29 Nov 2018 21:10:54 GMT

@Pikaboo-icu wrote:
@Jnbmom wrote:
Thank you so much for the kind words, yes I have taken care of my mom for the past 6 years and I feel very lost as she was such a big part of my life everyday.
Wow you're my soul sister..
My mom moved in with me 6 years ago, in Oct.
I've been her caregiver and dealt with all of her finances etc... I'm staring down the barrel of this eventually so I have a good idea of what you're going through.
Hang in there- and please find somebody to lean on.. You need to allow yourself to lean on somebody else when the going gets tough.

Awwww thank you so much, yes we lost my father suddenly about 6 years ago and we moved mom in with us. You never realize how much of a routine you do until you don't do it anymore

Re: Need advice regarding credit cards with death of the card holder

RonM21 — Thu, 29 Nov 2018 22:02:57 GMT

Jnbmom, so sorry to hear of your loss. I can't imagine how difficult this is to deal with. Like the others, I hope this process is as easy as possible for you!

Re: Need advice regarding credit cards with death of the card holder

Jnbmom — Thu, 29 Nov 2018 22:18:42 GMT

@RonM21 wrote:
Jnbmom, so sorry to hear of your loss. I can't imagine how difficult this is to deal with. Like the others, I hope this process is as easy as possible for you!

Thank you. Yes I am going to start calling tomorrow as today has been alot already on the phone.

Re: Need advice regarding credit cards with death of the card holder

RobertEG — Thu, 29 Nov 2018 23:07:22 GMT

Hopefully, she had a will.

The issues you are addressing are responsibilities of the executor/administrator appointed in the will.

I would not discuss what is or is not considered to be part of her estate with anyone unless you are acting as the executor/adminstrator

Re: Need advice regarding credit cards with death of the card holder

Jnbmom — Fri, 30 Nov 2018 01:20:00 GMT

She had no will and I am her only child .

Re: Need advice regarding credit cards with death of the card holder

UncleB — Fri, 30 Nov 2018 04:21:44 GMT

@Jnbmom wrote:
She had no will and I am her only child .

@Jnbmom I'm so sorry for your loss.

Two years ago when my grandfather passed I went through what you're about to go through, and while it's a bit of paperwork it's nothing you can't handle.

The first thing I would do is nothing at all... give yourself some time to deal with your loss, and to digest all the paperwork - there's likely to be quite a bit. At this point there is no urgency for you, although some creditors might act as if there is.

Obviously every case is different and you should seek out local legal advice if there is anything you're uncertain about (things can be different from state-to-state) but in my grandfather's case there was no will, no estate, and nothing to probate. Further simplifying things he and my grandmother did not live in a community property state, so his personal debts were not her responsibility.

I had several extra official copies of my grandfather's death certificate on hand, but all of the banks/credit cards accepted a photocopy - the local Wells Fargo branch was even nice enough to give us back the original when we went to have him removed from the bank account.

The local WF branch was also able to help with canceling his credit card (this might be an option if your mom had accounts with local banks), and a few weeks later we got a letter from them inquiring about an estate, etc. I had a form letter typed up with his name, address, SS#, date of birth, and date of death that explained that there was no will and no estate and probate would not be done - very short, as in three or four lines. I stapled a copy of the death certificate to this letter and sent it back in the return envelope provided by the bank. Easy-peasy.

The only thing I had some difficulty with was some of the ambulance and medical bills; a few were quite persistent (after insurance paid there were still some balances due). Even after I sent my form letter and a copy of the death certificate they kept sending notices, often marked 'final notice' with a threat to report to the credit bureaus (I can assure you he didn't/doesn't care at this point).

Finally I amended my letter with the instruction "Do not contact us again regarding this debt" and I sent a copy (again, with a photocopy of the death certificate) it to every address on the billing notice... the payment address, the return address, and the billing inquiry address (which I had already sent one to). It cost a few stamps, but the notices stopped.

Had there been an estate things would have been quite different (obviously the bills would have been paid) but that was not the case, and that was not my fault - nor the fault of my aging grandmother.

All that being said, remember that these bills are not yours, and you'll not be accomplishing anything (or proving anything to anybody) by paying them yourself. Some unscrupulous collectors will sometimes try to trick or guilt family into paying a debt that is not theirs, and sadly sometimes family members fall for it.

Again, if you have any questions other than the basic how-to's of dealing with creditors you should get legal advice from a local attorney.

Hopefully this will help a bit, and again I'm so sorry for your loss.

Re: Need advice regarding credit cards with death of the card holder

Jnbmom — Fri, 30 Nov 2018 04:33:36 GMT

Thanks you @UncleB for the info. I truly appreciate it. Yes no will, no estate and not a community propery state.

When I am a little less stressed I will then Take care of this. May I ask if you called them first or did you just send letters to the creditors? I made about 10 copies of the DC as I know I will need to send them copies.

Re: Need advice regarding credit cards with death of the card holder

UncleB — Fri, 30 Nov 2018 04:58:12 GMT

@Jnbmom wrote:
@Anonymous you @UncleB for the info. I truly appreciate it. Yes no will, no estate and not a community propery state.

When I am a little less stressed I will then Take care of this. May I ask if you called them first or did you just send letters to the creditors? I made about 10 copies of the DC as I know I will need to send them copies.

Since his only credit card with a balance was at the same bank where he had a deposit account we were able to knock it out in person (the branch CSR called the bankcard center on our behalf), but I would have called the number on the back of the card had that not been the case. Banks are used to dealing with this, so it won't be a problem for them either way.

The letter we got from the Wells Fargo bankcard center to 'follow up' was fairly basic, really just making sure there was no estate to make a claim with; the initial contact we made in-person stopped the interest and shut down the card but they didn't ask about estate matters that day. With the letter they sent I checked all the proper boxes and attached my form letter and a photocopy of the DC for good measure (although the local branch had already faxed it over the day we were there). I never heard another peep from them.

Honestly the medical and ambulance were the only ones that were actually persistant, the ambulance in particular. The letters finally worked, though.

You are no doubt stressed... right now just take care of yourself; this stuff can wait.

Re: Need advice regarding credit cards with death of the card holder

Jnbmom — Fri, 30 Nov 2018 13:06:33 GMT

Thank you @UncleB

I appreciate your advice and your kind words.

Re: Need advice regarding credit cards with death of the card holder

outofcredit — Fri, 30 Nov 2018 14:56:11 GMT

@UncleB wrote:
@Jnbmom wrote:
She had no will and I am her only child .
@Jnbmom I'm so sorry for your loss.

Two years ago when my grandfather passed I went through what you're about to go through, and while it's a bit of paperwork it's nothing you can't handle.

The first thing I would do is nothing at all... give yourself some time to deal with your loss, and to digest all the paperwork - there's likely to be quite a bit. At this point there is no urgency for you, although some creditors might act as if there is.

Obviously every case is different and you should seek out local legal advice if there is anything you're uncertain about (things can be different from state-to-state) but in my grandfather's case there was no will, no estate, and nothing to probate. Further simplifying things he and my grandmother did not live in a community property state, so his personal debts were not her responsibility.

I had several extra official copies of my grandfather's death certificate on hand, but all of the banks/credit cards accepted a photocopy - the local Wells Fargo branch was even nice enough to give us back the original when we went to have him removed from the bank account.

The local WF branch was also able to help with canceling his credit card (this might be an option if your mom had accounts with local banks), and a few weeks later we got a letter from them inquiring about an estate, etc. I had a form letter typed up with his name, address, SS#, date of birth, and date of death that explained that there was no will and no estate and probate would not be done - very short, as in three or four lines. I stapled a copy of the death certificate to this letter and sent it back in the return envelope provided by the bank. Easy-peasy.

The only thing I had some difficulty with was some of the ambulance and medical bills; a few were quite persistent (after insurance paid there were still some balances due). Even after I sent my form letter and a copy of the death certificate they kept sending notices, often marked 'final notice' with a threat to report to the credit bureaus (I can assure you he didn't/doesn't care at this point).

Finally I amended my letter with the instruction "Do not contact us again regarding this debt" and I sent a copy (again, with a photocopy of the death certificate) it to every address on the billing notice... the payment address, the return address, and the billing inquiry address (which I had already sent one to). It cost a few stamps, but the notices stopped.

Had there been an estate things would have been quite different (obviously the bills would have been paid) but that was not the case, and that was not my fault - nor the fault of my aging grandmother.

All that being said, remember that these bills are not yours, and you'll not be accomplishing anything (or proving anything to anybody) by paying them yourself. Some unscrupulous collectors will sometimes try to trick or guilt family into paying a debt that is not theirs, and sadly sometimes family members fall for it.

Again, if you have any questions other than the basic how-to's of dealing with creditors you should get legal advice from a local attorney.

Hopefully this will help a bit, and again I'm so sorry for your loss.

So very sorry for your loss. I had the same situation when my mother passed with no will, no probate and only enough insurance to cover her burial. I still miss her every day and the routines that had become part of our daily lives. Please take your time, take care of yourself and the advice UncleB and other have offered was precisely the route I successfully used to deal with creditors. My thoughts are with you.

Re: Need advice regarding credit cards with death of the card holder

Jnbmom — Fri, 30 Nov 2018 15:00:21 GMT

Thank you @outofcredit

I appreciate you sharing your experience. Yes the days are a little rough as she lived with me for 5 years and had starting taking care of her a little over 6 years ago. I know she is in s much better place and at peace.

Re: Need advice regarding credit cards with death of the card holder UPDATE

Jnbmom — Thu, 06 Dec 2018 05:07:48 GMT

Ok this is kinda strange, just got an email ( in her email)from Discover letting me know they are aware of my mom's death and want someone contact them regarding her estate/assets and who is paying the bill.

Now she has nothing so I know they will be getting nothing of course and will call and tell them politely.

But my question is how did they find out???? Do they do some kinda monthly datebase searches for deceased names?? It is kind of strange to me??

Any clue??

Thanks

Re: Need advice regarding credit cards with death of the card holder UPDATE

UncleB — Thu, 06 Dec 2018 05:24:55 GMT

@Jnbmom wrote:
Ok this is kinda strange, just got an email ( in her email)from Discover letting me know they are aware of my mom's death and want someone contact them regarding her estate/assets and who is paying the bill.

Now she has nothing so I know they will be getting nothing of course and will call and tell them politely.

But my question is how did they find out???? Do they do some kinda monthly datebase searches for deceased names?? It is kind of strange to me??

Any clue??
Thanks

Yep, there's something called the Death Master File, or DMF, that's kept by Social Security. When someone passes, the funeral home will usually do the paperwork to report the SS# to the SSA, which causes the file to be updated. Eventually the info feeds down to the credit bureaus and banks.

Since Discover is already 'officially' aware of your mom's passing it should be a very brief phone call. They might still send you a form to sign-off on stating there's no estate, but that should be the extent of it.

Re: Need advice regarding credit cards with death of the card holder UPDATE

Jnbmom — Thu, 06 Dec 2018 05:28:29 GMT

@UncleB wrote:
@Jnbmom wrote:
Ok this is kinda strange, just got an email ( in her email)from Discover letting me know they are aware of my mom's death and want someone contact them regarding her estate/assets and who is paying the bill.

Now she has nothing so I know they will be getting nothing of course and will call and tell them politely.

But my question is how did they find out???? Do they do some kinda monthly datebase searches for deceased names?? It is kind of strange to me??

Any clue??
Thanks

Yep, there's something called the Death Master File, or DMF, that's kept by Social Security. When someone passes, the funeral home will usually do the paperwork to report the SS# to the SSA, which causes the file to be updated. Eventually the info feeds down to the credit bureaus and banks.

Since Discover is already 'officially' aware of your mom's passing it should be a very brief phone call. They might still send you a form to sign-off on stating there's no estate, but that should be the extent of it.

Thanks so much, kinda freaked me out a little that they know so fast, I am still processing it

But thanks it makes sense and yes now it will be a shorter and hopefully easier conversation.

Re: Need advice regarding credit cards with death of the card holder UPDATE

UncleB — Thu, 06 Dec 2018 05:32:12 GMT

@Jnbmom wrote:
@UncleB wrote:
@Jnbmom wrote:
Ok this is kinda strange, just got an email ( in her email)from Discover letting me know they are aware of my mom's death and want someone contact them regarding her estate/assets and who is paying the bill.

Now she has nothing so I know they will be getting nothing of course and will call and tell them politely.

But my question is how did they find out???? Do they do some kinda monthly datebase searches for deceased names?? It is kind of strange to me??

Any clue??
Thanks

Yep, there's something called the Death Master File, or DMF, that's kept by Social Security. When someone passes, the funeral home will usually do the paperwork to report the SS# to the SSA, which causes the file to be updated. Eventually the info feeds down to the credit bureaus and banks.

Since Discover is already 'officially' aware of your mom's passing it should be a very brief phone call. They might still send you a form to sign-off on stating there's no estate, but that should be the extent of it.
Thanks so much, kinda freaked me out a little that they know so fast, I am still processing it

But thanks it makes sense and yes now it will be a shorter and hopefully easier conversation.

You're very welcome... hang in there; you got this!