topic Re: Cocktail -vs- formal for holiday party in SmorgasBoard

Cocktail -vs- formal for holiday party

Anonymous — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 17:15:48 GMT

The dress code says "Cocktail or Formal Attire" for women, "Suit or Black Tie" for men... eek! How cocktail is cocktail, and how formal is formal in NoVa?

When I think formal, I think evening gown, possibly a healthy dose of sequins on the thing. I think cocktail, and I see cocktail-length, but any variety of formality from coulda worn it to the office with a business jacket, to something by Dior... Very easy to end up being ridiculously over- or under-dressed, and I don't want to do that for DH's sake. His first big event as an exec at his new company (been there only 3 months).

Advice, please!

Re: Cocktail -vs- formal for holiday party

haulingthescoreup — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 17:19:05 GMT

Cocktail style and length, with plenty of glam.

If it turns out to be dress down, the others will be jealous of you making the effort, and if it turns out to look like a reception for royalty, you'll have enough stuff going on to fit in.

Besides, no one ever gets to wear that kind of outfit! I'm jealous. My Christmas party attire consists of those weird Christmas sweaters. By golly, I'd love to turn up in something slinky and black!

Have fun!

Re: Cocktail -vs- formal for holiday party

llecs — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 18:12:11 GMT

ivyalmighty wrote:
The dress code says "Cocktail or Formal Attire" for women, "Suit or Black Tie" for men... eek! How cocktail is cocktail, and how formal is formal in NoVa?

They say what they mean here. DW loves it! My wallet hates it. If they say "formal" or "black tie", you'll usually find about 1/3 in tuxedos at any given event. Ladies usually are wearing full-length gowns or separates (not up on the lingo).

Re: Cocktail -vs- formal for holiday party

Anonymous — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 18:30:54 GMT

Boo llecs! I prefer cocktail! I'm too young for full-length unless it's the MC Birthday Ball!

((Plus I got a fabulous cocktail dress a few weeks ago & need a reason to break it out!))

Oh well guess I have to do some shopping!

ETA: Llecs, you should tell your wife to check out XXXXXXX tons of evening dresses for under $100... granted, they do have a wide selection of gowns best suited for a "date for hire" but uhhh.. they also have some really nice slinky ones!!

EDITED AGAIN because I forgot that site also has a very interesting costume section... pm me if you want the site lol

Message Edited by ivyalmighty on 11-17-2008 10:20 AM

Message Edited by ivyalmighty on 11-17-2008 10:30 AM

Re: Cocktail -vs- formal for holiday party

Anonymous — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 18:39:41 GMT

i so miss dressing up.

i would go all out full length, sequinsy, backless jobby that would require a trip to the tanning salon for a shot of mystic.

for price and comfort i'd go cocktail length. i found the most darling tea length poofy skirt dress at dillards for NYE 2 years ago. comfy and cute. kinda a take off from a 50s dress. i got lots of compliments on it and it was very easy to dance in, sit in and general prancing around acknowledging my princessness in

Re: Cocktail -vs- formal for holiday party

Anonymous — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 18:50:07 GMT

After age 10, it's always, always better to overdress rather than underdress. I hated that on my first day of kindergarten, this is public school folks, my mom dressed me up in a polo shirt and khaki pants. Très embarassing.

Re: Cocktail -vs- formal for holiday party

Anonymous — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 18:51:54 GMT

My first day of kindergarten, I wore a navy blue sailor dress with three GIANT crayola crayons embroidered on it.

Re: Cocktail -vs- formal for holiday party

Anonymous — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 20:15:19 GMT

Hahahahaha. Thanks for making me feel better about myself.

Re: Cocktail -vs- formal for holiday party

MidnightVoice — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 20:18:12 GMT

I once went to the Hilton in London in a black tux and got mistaken for a waiter. GF thought it was hilarious

Re: Cocktail -vs- formal for holiday party

demi — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 22:40:35 GMT

I would go for the glitz !

If you have Ross' on the east coast, try them for formal wear. I go to 2-3 formal events a year, and I don't think I have ever spent more than 20 dollars for a dress or sequiny thing there. Of course, add in shoes, etc, it adds up, but I am a firm believer in spending more for shoes I wear every day then some drop dead beautiful pair I will wear once.

Re: Cocktail -vs- formal for holiday party

Anonymous — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 00:45:22 GMT

@Anonymous wrote:
The dress code says "Cocktail or Formal Attire" for women, "Suit or Black Tie" for men... eek! How cocktail is cocktail, and how formal is formal in NoVa?

When I think formal, I think evening gown, possibly a healthy dose of sequins on the thing. I think cocktail, and I see cocktail-length, but any variety of formality from coulda worn it to the office with a business jacket, to something by Dior... Very easy to end up being ridiculously over- or under-dressed, and I don't want to do that for DH's sake. His first big event as an exec at his new company (been there only 3 months).

Advice, please!

WHERE in NoVa are we talking? Georgetown? Alexandria? Who else will be there? Politicos? Friends? DH's colleagues?

In my experience, the definition of "cocktail attire" is usually defined by the where's and the whos. If the fete is being thrown by a good friend who votes Left, you can let your style show as much as you like. If we're talking DH's work (government contracting, right?), then focus on classy and let your personal style peek through with accessories.

I TOTALLY see you being able to pull an Audrey Hepburn and be able to modify even the stuffiest style with flair and verve! Get funky enough with the accessories that you come off as "individual" or "confidently stylish" but still tight patootie enough to convince the bluenoses that you're one of "them!"

Just get a nice black number -- one that skims your body (since you DESERVE to look and FEEL sexy -- and **feeling** sexy will definitely be the best accessory you can have!) and have fun with the accessories! Accessories ALWAYS make the look!

FTR, I am fairly qualified to make those statements -- 2 years of Fashion Merchandising, 3 years modeling and 10 years "working" as a couture sewist!

Re: Cocktail -vs- formal for holiday party

Anonymous — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 02:58:27 GMT

Male opinion: Simple black dresses (backless, I think you call them) ALWAYS look classy. If there are 500 women in a room my eye always goes to the black dress. Of course, there are usually 498 black dresses, so I guess you ladies know what I like.

Re: Cocktail -vs- formal for holiday party

llecs — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 19:56:30 GMT

I talked to DW and she said to go with a cocktail dress. Her fashionista advice always trumps mine. In fact, when I told her what I told you, she ask me "what were you thinking?".

Re: Cocktail -vs- formal for holiday party

Anonymous — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 20:40:46 GMT

LOL llecs!

When I asked DH, his response to all of this was "Well why don't you just wear the dress that you wore to the USMC ball two years ago?!" HA!!! (first, it's very light silver/gold and has barely-there straps that give it a very summery feel... definitely not winter-formal OR winter-cocktail friendly! second, I have had body "alterations" since then, so my new top half would shred that dress and then stand over it laughing maniacally).

Trying to decide between these:

1. http://www.chelseasofnewyork.com/Sequin_Top_Ruched_Halter_Gown_p/4220-p.htm (the slit will be altered to be more conservative)

2. http://www.chelseasofnewyork.com/Black_Cocktail_Gown_p/2495l-rb.htm

3. http://www.promgirl.com/shop/dresses/viewitem-PD381419 that I already own.. minus the rhinestones & plus a little cap sleeve detail -- but the ruching is the same.

Re: Cocktail -vs- formal for holiday party

fishbjc — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 22:11:46 GMT

Since you asked....Those first two are tacky and cheap looking. The third one is cute, but needs a little jacket.

Since he's in an executive position, you want to appear classy and elegant.

Re: Cocktail -vs- formal for holiday party

fishbjc — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 22:14:15 GMT

Please, avoid alcohol and look *under-stated*, a wife that makes an error can be the kiss of death for her husbands career. I've seen this happen so many times.

Re: Cocktail -vs- formal for holiday party

BeautifulBlueBoy — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 22:18:43 GMT

I can't get over those first two......

Re: Cocktail -vs- formal for holiday party

haulingthescoreup — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 22:39:18 GMT

I agree with fish, and I'm not that wild about the third.

Don't go shopping in the Mother of the Bride department, but you need to be thinking subtle and elegant, not these.

Re: Cocktail -vs- formal for holiday party

Anonymous — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 23:13:32 GMT

Sorry, Ivy, but I'd have to agree with Fish and Hauling.

I would honestly advise you to head to the nearest newsstand and pick up a copy of Vogue. The current issue should have a few articles on party dresses (since, it tis the season, you know). Pick out the one you like bestest and head on out to your local department store ish in hand. You'll see oodles of knock-offs at reasonable prices.

Personally, I like Dillards for party-gear. They're reasonably priced, stylish and fairly current as to what's on the runways -- well, not RECENTLY on the runways, but you don't want runway (since the styles you'll find there are too .... extreme for us faint-hearted normal fashionistas.

The trick is to find something CLOSE to the current haute couture finds and take it down a couple of notches. Think Vera Wang (Lord knows there's oodles of knock-offs of her gowns). She's PERFECT for understated glam. And trust me, if your DH's colleagues wives are like OURS here, they'll swoon at a Vera knock-off and gossip about it the next day, wondering if it was REALLY a Vera Wang!!

Re: Cocktail -vs- formal for holiday party

MsKiwi — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 23:22:20 GMT

@Anonymous wrote:
LOL llecs!

When I asked DH, his response to all of this was "Well why don't you just wear the dress that you wore to the USMC ball two years ago?!" HA!!! (first, it's very light silver/gold and has barely-there straps that give it a very summery feel... definitely not winter-formal OR winter-cocktail friendly! second, I have had body "alterations" since then, so my new top half would shred that dress and then stand over it laughing maniacally).

Trying to decide between these:

1. http://www.chelseasofnewyork.com/Sequin_Top_Ruched_Halter_Gown_p/4220-p.htm (the slit will be altered to be more conservative)

2. http://www.chelseasofnewyork.com/Black_Cocktail_Gown_p/2495l-rb.htm

3. http://www.promgirl.com/shop/dresses/viewitem-PD381419 that I already own.. minus the rhinestones & plus a little cap sleeve detail -- but the ruching is the same.

Since this is your first formal party with the new company I wouldn't wear any of the above dresses. Remember you are making first impressions (both of you)! Keep it simple. A simple black dress; not too short, simple jewelry. Keep it understated and you can't go wrong. Above all tone it down, think Jackie O, Audrey Hepburn.