The lawyer didn't even show up in court, he sent a replacement without ever telling us. We cannot afford a new attorney or we'd get someone. Honda has reported my husband as negative and closed account. The account has been paid the entire time. We do have to give it back in a week but when I spoke to them they said that technically we are in default of our terms due to bankruptcy. We never did any type of written agreement with them after the bankruptcy that either said we were taking the loan back over & would keep paying it. Their records only state we have violated the agreement and they refuse to remove it. I'm afraid of both. I was already sued but the papers were never served. The process server gave a description of someone that the only similarity is female. I received a letter in the mail saying that I was in default even though I was unaware of the pending court date. I gave that to my lawyer immediately & he said that he'd take care of it. The HVFCU (Hudson Valley Federal Credit Union) has the same accounts listed multiple times all in various amounts due to collection fees etc. They have a current judgment against me. They listed it as charged off, is a judgment, has been sold to someone else who has it in collections, sold it someone else who charged it off, and did the same with my husband's with the exception of the judgment. I know this is overwhelming but I'm drowning. My husband's score is 590, it shows 2 collection accounts, 1 charge off, & 2 revolving, equaling over $50,000. This is killing us. My dad who was going to help us get a car is now giving us one that my little brother doesn't want anymore. I know I shouldn't get anything extravagant but the economy is horrible, my husband makes about $60,000 a year now, if he cannot get to work in the snow he will be fired. They do not even plow our roads until 4am which is two hours later then he leaves. My dad is furious that I complained about getting a small car with 75,000 miles on it since he's buying my brother who is 31 & still living at home another brand new car because this one isn't good enough for him. I know there are probably only about ten days or a little more that the weather will be extremely severe, but don't know if wanting an SUV is being frivolous. I am trying to detach myself emotionally from the purchase. My dad offered to lease, not buy an SUV in his name but we'd make all payments including the down payment. Since he feels that I don't need an SUV & he has no use for the vehicle he feels it's good enough for my family. I'm considering trading in the car he gives me towards an SUV as soon as the title's in my name. The blue book even with the miles is around $13,000 to $15,000 but if my husband can't get to work it makes no difference. I'm having a tough time trying to differentiate need and want in this situation. I also can't get my husband to understand how serious the fact we only can live a couple of months off of our savings and have no more credit really is. I thought the bankruptcy would have opened his eyes but it hasn't. He feels entitled because he works hard. If we had stayed in the price range for the house I felt appropriate we wouldn't be struggling to make ends meet to begin with. I knew I could get at least $100,000 for my condo if I was patient. I had an accepted offer that fell through. I thought if I put $100,000 down on a house that was $200,000 or $225,000 at the very ceiling & paid all the closing costs out of pocket up front we'd be safe. Our home was $287,500. When I lost the accepted offer I panicked as I already put an accepted offer on my house so I lowered the price to get a fast sale. It forced me to close with nothing down. By the time I got the money from the condo it was owed everywhere. We've used our get out of jail free card with the bankruptcy. We need to be very careful about our obligations. I don't know if I should pay car payments for ten days a year. At the same time, if he misses work we'll have nothing. I don't want liens against my house from the judgment, the judgment's already on public record so I don't know why they didn't get a lien already. I also don't know if I should trade in the car to get an SUV. I'm in a panic & afraid to really do anything. I really need to make my husband understand how serious this is. He says he doesn't care if we lose the house, it would be easier to live in an apartment anyway. This house is all that's left of me working so hard for so many years, we now owe only $215,000, the tax accessor has it up to $333,000. I want to put more in savings & then pay down the mortgage when my principle payments are tiny & the interest is high. This is when I can make a difference in the number of years. I've printed up graphs & charts of all kinds to show my husband but he doesn't get it. I don't know how to make him understand. My head hurts so bad I haven't been able to eat in two days. I can't think clearly with all this pressure between life, my health, my dad, & my husband. I know it's bad to make decisions when you are in emotional overload. Had I not been 7 months pregnant I probably wouldn't have bought this house so quickly until the condo was really sold, not just an accepted offer. I apologize for having so much going on right now. I can't seem to separate anything right now & really need to have someone who is not personally involved to tell me what a reasonable person would do. It was easy when it was just me. I worked & paid the principle on my mortgage. My husband commented on how cheap I was when I said I couldn't afford to paint it sooner. If I had an extra $15 I put in on my principle. I did that with every extra penny I had. My goal was freedom from mortgage payments. The only one I had to worry about was me. Now I have a four year old, this year we did blow $500 going to the beach It was her first time at the beach, in a motel, or anywhere really. My husband & I have never been away unless you include the weekend he flew out to CA to hang out for a weekend while I was taking some classes out there. That was while we were still dating. I feel the family time at the beach was very important to us as a family. The line just gets blurry on other things. I really appreciate any guidance you can offer. Thank You, Kim
