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Oh my goodness ~ what do you say ...

bunnyrabbit
Valued Contributor

Re: Oh my goodness ~ what do you say ...


@trumpet-205 wrote:

When I first started on building my credit history, my parents refused to give me a jump start in any possible way. This includes adding me as an AU or lending me money for secured credit card. I basically start with thin files to short credit history now (10 months). My dad did eventually agreed to add me to one of his AU, but that's only after I have obtained my first CC.

 

While your intention are good, you did not discussed with your daughter prior hand. Honestly, I feel I learned more about credit history on my own rather than having my parents giving me a jump start.


trumpet ... when I grew-up, there was no credit card ... ONLY the bank ATM card other than cash.  Even after I graduate from high school and got a job, I've never had any of CC until after I got married in 1990.  And it (NFCU VISA with 1k CL) was the only one I had until 2005.  So, I basically learned about CCs myself too ~ especially from this forums!   Smiley Wink

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It's very tough with small income ~ The Rewards are big little helper to me.
Message 21 of 39
bunnyrabbit
Valued Contributor

Re: Oh my goodness ~ what do you say ...

Thanks everyone for your honest opinion.  I learned something new again.   Smiley Very Happy

 

Yes, my daughter is very responsible.  That's why I signed up for her checking acct as joint owner with NFCU when she were reached 14 and she got Sharecheck VISA Card.  A few times I spotted transactions she made the purchase over the online, which must be at least 18 yrs of age to do so.  Therefore, I spooked with sellers and my daughter about those transactions.  The sealer said there is no way to check the real/actual age.  And I told my daughter that she did not follow the rules and I will close the acct if she do it again!   Guess ... she has never used her Sharecheck VISA on online/telephone order after that.

 

Additional info:

I've added my 14 yrs old son as AU and I kept the cards also.   When he was visiting me last month, I handed a card to send him out for grocery shopping for me instead give him some cash.  He liked it and asked me to let him take the ccs back with him.  Of cause I told him "No" .... he is not responsible as his sister yet.   He did not want to let his Treefrog design Discover card go ...   So, since he is 14 ... I did the same thing as I did for my daughter, which is opened checking acct for him so he can have Sharecheck Visa card and learn something new.  I will see how he handles his money ~.

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It's very tough with small income ~ The Rewards are big little helper to me.
Message 22 of 39
Tazman81
Established Contributor

Re: Oh my goodness ~ what do you say ...

Though I know that OP had great intentions, I think this provides a good lesson for couples to actually communicate about finances/credit and make an informed decision together.

 

OP, maybe have DD read some of these posts or make an account on myFICO to browse some of the great advice on this board.


Current Score: Eq: 823 Tu: 830
Goal Score: Eq: 850 Tu: 850

Wallet: PenFed Power Cash 50k | AMEX Blue Cash (AU) 49.5k | Cap One QSMC 26.5k | AMEX Platinum NPSL | USAA Signature Visa 25k
Message 23 of 39
bunnyrabbit
Valued Contributor

Re: Oh my goodness ~ what do you say ...


@Tazman81 wrote:

Though I know that OP had great intentions, I think this provides a good lesson for couples to actually communicate about finances/credit and make an informed decision together.

 

OP, maybe have DD read some of these posts or make an account on myFICO to browse some of the great advice on this board.



Yeah right ....  I'm divorced from the person 180 degrees different than my thinking regarding the financial management.  

 

Yes, I've already suggest her to do so.  It's all up to her ~ 

 

She pulled EQ score from Score Watch (used 10 days Free Trial) ... Very Nice score of 802.   Now she thinks I ruined her credit score and history, and even more worth, she thinks it will be screw if I remove her from my ccs as AU.   I told her that it just go back to the beginning after I remove her as AU from my ccs.  But still she is kind of stressed.   I will give her time to think about ...

 

I've had conversation with her and she told that sometimes I help her too much and this is one of too much help she said.   Now, I am waiting her response to tell me what she want me to do about her AU acct.

 

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It's very tough with small income ~ The Rewards are big little helper to me.
Message 24 of 39
MarineVietVet
Moderator Emeritus

Re: Oh my goodness ~ what do you say ...

Well bunnyrabbit it looks like it's you and me against the world   Smiley Happy  because I have no problem with what you did. I've added both of my sons as AU's on all my cards when they were minors and have never told them and don't intend to tell them.

 

And no I did not give out their SS #'s.

 

Just my 2 cents.

 

 

 

From a BK years ago to:
EX - 3/11 pulled by lender- 835, EQ - 2/11-816, TU - 2/11-782

"Some people spend an entire lifetime wondering if they've made a difference. The Marines don't have that problem".

 

 

Message 25 of 39
Tazman81
Established Contributor

Re: Oh my goodness ~ what do you say ...


@bunnyrabbit wrote:

@Tazman81 wrote:

Though I know that OP had great intentions, I think this provides a good lesson for couples to actually communicate about finances/credit and make an informed decision together.

 

OP, maybe have DD read some of these posts or make an account on myFICO to browse some of the great advice on this board.



Yeah right ....  I'm divorced from the person 180 degrees different than my thinking regarding the financial management.  

 

Yes, I've already suggest her to do so.  It's all up to her ~ 

 

She pulled EQ score from Score Watch (used 10 days Free Trial) ... Very Nice score of 802.   Now she thinks I ruined her credit score and history, and even more worth, she thinks it will be screw if I remove her from my ccs as AU.   I told her that it just go back to the beginning after I remove her as AU from my ccs.  But still she is kind of stressed.   I will give her time to think about ...

 

I've had conversation with her and she told that sometimes I help her too much and this is one of too much help she said.   Now, I am waiting her response to tell me what she want me to do about her AU acct.

 



Well, with a score of  802 then DD must be doing something right.


Current Score: Eq: 823 Tu: 830
Goal Score: Eq: 850 Tu: 850

Wallet: PenFed Power Cash 50k | AMEX Blue Cash (AU) 49.5k | Cap One QSMC 26.5k | AMEX Platinum NPSL | USAA Signature Visa 25k
Message 26 of 39
Wolf3
Senior Contributor

Re: Oh my goodness ~ what do you say ...


@MarineVietVet wrote:

Well bunnyrabbit it looks like it's you and me against the world   Smiley Happy  because I have no problem with what you did. I've added both of my sons as AU's on all my cards when they were minors and have never told them and don't intend to tell them.

 

And no I did not give out their SS #'s.

 

Just my 2 cents.

 

 

 

From a BK years ago to:
EX - 3/11 pulled by lender- 835, EQ - 2/11-816, TU - 2/11-782

"Some people spend an entire lifetime wondering if they've made a difference. The Marines don't have that problem".

 

 


 IMO,  Doing this for your minor children is completely different than doing to your adult children.    Adult children should have a right to be accept or decline, even if it is a good thing you are doing.

Message 27 of 39
ChesterPDexter
Established Contributor

Re: Oh my goodness ~ what do you say ...

I am late to the discussion; sorry, my power was out (that's a partial excuse.)

 

I added my oldest child as an authorized user of my Bloomingdale's.  As a typical boy, he doesn't go near a clothing store - I don't think he ever saw the card or cared about it.  When he turned 18 I encouraged him to apply for a USAA Mastercard and amazingly, he got one all on his own - with only a $300 limit but that seems appropriate for a college student, in my opinion.  His income obviously is/was low and he uses the card only to buy textbooks twice per year and pay it off immediately (I help him pay it and/or remind him to log on and check it and pay it.)  He has made a few tiny school-related purchases and is gradually getting the hang of remembering to watch for the statement, then pay it off.  I don't think he would have been approved for that card had I not added him several years' prior to my rarely-used Bloomingdale's.  I pulled a CR for him once and I saw that he had 3 years' history on Bloomie's and I think that was an excellent start to his credit file.

 

I have done the same for my second child, who is now 15.  Recently I added him to my also rarely-used Neiman Marcus.  I hope it reports the same way Bloomingdales does.  I was lucky that being a Bloomie's AU actually created a credit file for my oldest; I'm not sure if NM will create a credit file for son #2.  That's the intent, though.  Both boys are super-conservative, financially, although the second is far more interested in money and finance.   Sorry your daughter didn't appreciate it, OP.  I'm glad your son does.  Sons seem easier than daughters in almost every way, correct?  Smiley Wink

_________________________________________________________
Too many accounts; too many debts; lots of open credit, and lots of utilized credit. Scores somewhere in the 600s - I have no earthly idea exactly what number, but not 700 like it was, briefly.
Message 28 of 39
TangMeister
Frequent Contributor

Re: Oh my goodness ~ what do you say ...

 


@MarineVietVet wrote:

Well bunnyrabbit it looks like it's you and me against the world   Smiley Happy  because I have no problem with what you did. I've added both of my sons as AU's on all my cards when they were minors and have never told them and don't intend to tell them.

 

And no I did not give out their SS #'s.

 

Just my 2 cents.

 

 

 

From a BK years ago to:
EX - 3/11 pulled by lender- 835, EQ - 2/11-816, TU - 2/11-782

"Some people spend an entire lifetime wondering if they've made a difference. The Marines don't have that problem".

 

 


A BIG +1.

Message 29 of 39
in0wh3r3ul1v3
New Contributor

Re: Oh my goodness ~ what do you say ...

i think that's the problem with kids these days. parents are bargaining with their kids. kids who can't even wipe their own ass, are calling the shots.

 

you did nothing wrong, IMHO.

 

i think you should leave her as an AU, but keep the cards. let her apply on her own for a simple, student CC. explain to her make credit work for her, and go from there.

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Message 30 of 39
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