I'm not enjoying this ride..

[fuzzybean]

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@tooleman694 wrote:

If you are grossing 11k a month, then even with 45 percent backend ratio you should still have lots of left over cash.

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We have other bills to pay and don't want to stop putting money into savings and retirement accounts.  We have children.  We're not getting any younger (I'm almost 43 and hubby just turned 49).  And, as great of a job and benefits as hubby has, there is no guarantee it will be there forever.  I refuse to be house poor.

[tooleman694]

You must have a crap load of bills.

I just want to point out, high income earners dont tend to be house poor even with a maxed out backend ratio.

Our backend is over 45 percent. We are not house poor, and iv got 3 kids and bills.

[fuzzybean]

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@tooleman694 wrote:

You must have a crap load of bills.

I just want to point out, high income earners dont tend to be house poor even with a maxed out backend ratio.

Our backend is over 45 percent. We are not house poor, and iv got 3 kids and bills.

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No, I don't have a crap load of bills and I'm not maxed out on CC or anything else.  Just your every days utilities and two car payments (and no we don't drive luxury cars) like most families.  The only extras we have are school ($399 a month) and we have to use Hinckly Springs for drinking water ($105).  In case you haven't noticed, gas costs a fortune.  I would like to continue to save the amount we are saving each month and in order to do that I need a smaller mortgage.  I would like to be able to help my girls with their wedding some day without taking out a loan.  They may need some help with school.  Again, I don't want to take out a loan for it. 

I have my personal reasons for wanting a good cash flow and really, that's all that matters.

[Blackhawks_girl30]

I have to agree with others saying that they would have run far away.  Not once has my realtor or loan officer looked at me any different because I said I wanted to stay WAY below the amount they pre-approved me for.  I was pre-approved for $200k and I was looking at homes for around $80k.  No one ever suggested that I take money from my 401k or to stop putting money into my 401k, that is just crazy!  Now if you don't have the extra cash then I could see them "suggesting" using that money vs having no where to live.  Good luck in your house hunt and I wish you all the best =)

[crunching_numbers]

Fuzzy bean- you know what you have to do. Get rid of this mortgage person while you can. Your instincts are right about them. Move on to a reputable person. It is your decision how much house to get, not theirs. 

[p-]

We're at 16 percent monthly compared to net take home, after 401k, medical insurance, etc. and it was the best decision we ever made.  When my Wife's company was bought out by Pfizer and she was laid off, there was never a moment where we were worried about making our payment.  In fact, she took a brief hiatus to spend time with our newborn, stress free.  She's back in the workforce now, and we can afford to do the things we want.

We've talked about going bigger, and decided that we would just pay that extra amount toward other debt, then toward savings, and go larger when we had enough saved to still keep the DTI low.

I'm pretty blunt, but if it were me I'd just have a frank conversation with the loan officer.  I'd tell him, "This is what we're comfortable with.  If you can't accept that then I'll have to let you go."

[fuzzybean]

Good grief, at least read the posts. The man is done!

[fuzzybean]

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@crunching_numbers wrote:

Fuzzy bean- you know what you have to do. Get rid of this mortgage person while you can. Your instincts are right about them. Move on to a reputable person. It is your decision how much house to get, not theirs. 

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Absolutely, he's been "fired".

[fuzzybean]

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@p- wrote:

We're at 16 percent monthly compared to net take home, after 401k, medical insurance, etc. and it was the best decision we ever made.  When my Wife's company was bought out by Pfizer and she was laid off, there was never a moment where we were worried about making our payment.  In fact, she took a brief hiatus to spend time with our newborn, stress free.  She's back in the workforce now, and we can afford to do the things we want.

We've talked about going bigger, and decided that we would just pay that extra amount toward other debt, then toward savings, and go larger when we had enough saved to still keep the DTI low.

I'm pretty blunt, but if it were me I'd just have a frank conversation with the loan officer.  I'd tell him, "This is what we're comfortable with.  If you can't accept that then I'll have to let you go."

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The loan officer is done!  Good for you and your wife!