(Edited to add more info:
My post isn't a Question of whether I should refinance right now or not. I have my reasons, I've done this a few times before and understand the pros and cons. While I appreciate the responses, I feel like all of the rate questions are taking my post away from my question. Thank you for understanding this.
I should have been more clear with the details. I have a VA loan and would like to refinance through an IRRL streamline. I filed BK7 that was discharged (january will be 3 years) and did not reconfirm the existing mortgage so it no longer reports, so I have no mortgage on my reports either. I won't be using a conventional and I do not want to touch my equity. My original mortgage was with Veteran's United and I really liked them but after a few years they transfered the mortgage to another servicer. The VA only requires a 2 year waiting period but lenders who have longer waits can go by theirs (like NavFed is 4 years). VU and a few others use the VA's 2 year wait period.)
I'm applying for a refinance on my home but I'm only 3 years (Jan 7) past discharge. I had applied online and paid a $20 credit report charge and then it said a Loan officer would be in touch with me. Then she told me that their requirement is 4 years past discharge 
She said that they have the power to make exceptions but wanted me to know that the BK time would be the thing that could break the deal. I told her that I had paid for the credit pull and might as well try and she is now putting it all together to submit for me.
Has anyone here been approved by NFCU for a refinance (not originally with NFCU) with only 3 years past discharge? I think I've been a good customer of theres for several years and have had an auto loan with them and another one approved but I went with another lender on that vehicle, also their Signature Visa that just had a CLI to $5K. Not sure what my mortgage scores are, but my revolving credit utilization is less than 15%.
Fico 8's:
Equifax: 685
TU: (will update this, it's about the same as the others)
Ex: 673
That's pretty reference for a conventional loan. I didn't bother reading into what justified as extenuating circumantaces but this is a thing.
May I ask why you are trying to refinance in this current rate environment? Doesn't make a lot of sense to me for any mortgage underwritten before the massive spike in rates.
Unfortunately NCFU and everyone else has great leeway on their credit card products compared to mortgage underwriting which is pretty much dictated by the GSEs or FHA as third parities. NFCU isn't going to portfolio most of their mortgages and so they don't have the option of doing something different, good customer or not TBH.
I'm even sure they'd like to help but if you don't meet the extenuating conditions very few will play ball. I'd be looking at a HELOC personally if I needed to leverage the equity.
I don't know current VA loan rates but are they really less than what you are paying now? Google suggests 6.2% or so VA and rates have not been that high for a while.
A bad servicer is not a good reason to refinance if it's going to cost you non-trivial cash. Nor is trying to get a mortgage on your credit reports... my mortgage is really the only thing holding me back from the pointless 850.
