Argumenting about fixing credit

[Anonymous]

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@Journeygod wrote:

myFico Jeopardy!!!

1. Religion

2. Child rearing

3. Money

Answer: Name 3 things you should discuss before getting married!!!

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I sooo agree...

[Pway]

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@Journeygod wrote:

myFico Jeopardy!!!

1. Religion

2. Child rearing

3. Money

Answer: Name 3 things you should discuss before getting married!!!

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I TOTALLY AGREE.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like she doesn't know enough about credit to truly understand/care.

Ask her if she would want to pay an extra $100 per month on a mortgage when you both buy a house together one day.

Ask her if she would want the option to be able to lease a car one day.

Ask her if paying deposits on new cable/cell phone accounts sounds fun.

Sorry hahah! I just get very frustrated when people judge me when I talk about being obsessive about credit cards and my credit score.

Most people think just because someone has multiple credit cards it means they are spending thousands of dollars every month they don't have.

When I then continue to educate them on the benefits and the fact that I pay each one in full every month it usually shuts them up then...

[Existentialist]

Let me get this part out of the way first: Gunnar419 was spot on in stating U basically dropped the ball re: your approach to a well intentioned (yet ultimately misguided) effort @ reconciling finances with DW.

That said, I'm not going to suggest counseling or finance classes or such. Doesnt seem viable @ this point anyway given that one party appears to hav little to no interest in the matter.

How bout an alternate friendly suggestion...

If U want her to see your side of things (which I dont wholly disagree with) then you're going to hav to lead by example. Continue fixing YOUR OWN credit. If u want to reassure her that credit is a good thing and mutually beneficial then she needs to see it... FROM U. In the end what benefits U by extension will also benefit her. Hopefully once she begins to see the results of your positive credit management (and benefits therein) her fears will begin to subside to a point she's more comfortable.

There is obviously a reason she feels the way she does and this behavior can be explored down the line. She may bring it up without U even encourgaing the discussion. It may be something that eventually requires counseling or such, who knows - you can cross that bridge when/if the time comes. Meanwhile just continue to make things happen as U hav been (just with your own credit). As long as she's not impeding your ability to manage individual affairs theres actually no downside here. And it may take some time (so patience is required) but thats okay.

Worst case scenario - she never comes around. At the most it may slow down progress in terms of whatever it is you're trying to build (family wise) but shouldnt prevent them occurring. And after all this is the person U chose to spend your life with so no point belaboring the issue - just go about doing (your part) on what needs to be done to help your own cause. Its not ideal by any means but after all.... we're talking marriage.

And as Im sure you've now realized, in all matters financial and otherwise that requires DWs personal inclusion it would be wise to discuss them with her beforehand (for obvious reasons).

Call this nothing more than an unfortunate (but certainly manageable) glitch. Cuz the fun is just beginning

[jbsea]

Could not agree with you more Existentialist... so much has happened since i originally made this post.  Our scores have gone up, our cc have got better, new car....  We are at the point know where she just wants to know what card to use when.  It took a little time, but I was able to show how not only are my scores going up but so is hers.  That yes we could pay cash for everything but if we do use cards this is what we are getting back.  It took a lot of talking but it was well worth it.  We are in a happy place now.

[Existentialist]

Very glad to hear. U led by example and are in a much better place for it. Like I said, glitch.

You are indeed THE MAN!

Wishing U 'both' continued success.

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@jbsea wrote:

Could not agree with you more Existentialist... so much has happened since i originally made this post.  Our scores have gone up, our cc have got better, new car....  We are at the point know where she just wants to know what card to use when.  It took a little time, but I was able to show how not only are my scores going up but so is hers.  That yes we could pay cash for everything but if we do use cards this is what we are getting back.  It took a lot of talking but it was well worth it.  We are in a happy place now.

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[Gunnar419]

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@Existentialist wrote:

Thats what Im talkin bout. U led by example and are in a much better place for it. You know what this makes U right?

THE MAN!

Wishing U 'both' continued success.

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@jbsea wrote:

Could not agree with you more Existentialist... so much has happened since i originally made this post.  Our scores have gone up, our cc have got better, new car....  We are at the point know where she just wants to know what card to use when.  It took a little time, but I was able to show how not only are my scores going up but so is hers.  That yes we could pay cash for everything but if we do use cards this is what we are getting back.  It took a lot of talking but it was well worth it.  We are in a happy place now.

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+1 You did great, jbsea!

I'm sorry it started out as a painful learning experience, but clearly you and she have both learned and grown from it. Well done!

[Anonymous]

I have had horrible credit since I got out of school. Last year after my children's father passed away my credit was next to nothing. With life insurance I paid off all the bills and contacted law Firm. My credit score went from a 528 to 700 in a year. I was able to buy a truck and a house and get 5 credit cards.

[Anonymous]

OMG, so true, you made me laugh (and cry at the same time