cancel
Showing results for 
Search instead for 
Did you mean: 

Girlfriend upset I got credit cards

New Contributor

Girlfriend upset I got credit cards

I'm sure someone has delt with this before.... So the first card she got mad over.. my Cap 1.. then today I went to pay at a restaurant and they did not take Discover at first she did not really question it.. It was only when i was on the phone did I say something how it makes the quick app on the iphone turn blue and she went full on upset about that.

 

Long story short she thinks I'm going to go into debt with the cards but I'm using it to build my credit up.. So far my numbers are the highest it's ever been I was a little over 90% on my Cap 1 but I paid $200 on it to bring it under 50% both I have paid before any due date has shown up.

 

So I wonder how to handle this?

EQ:652 TU:630 EX:649 as of 6/17/16
Message 1 of 10
9 REPLIES
Regular Contributor

Re: Girlfriend upset I got credit cards


MikeB4 wrote:

I'm sure someone has delt with this before.... So the first card she got mad over.. my Cap 1.. then today I went to pay at a restaurant and they did not take Discover at first she did not really question it.. It was only when i was on the phone did I say something how it makes the quick app on the iphone turn blue and she went full on upset about that.

 

Long story short she thinks I'm going to go into debt with the cards but I'm using it to build my credit up.. So far my numbers are the highest it's ever been I was a little over 90% on my Cap 1 but I paid $200 on it to bring it under 50% both I have paid before any due date has shown up.

 

So I wonder how to handle this?


Simply communicate with her and explain to her how everything works. I think she's only upset because she doesn't have a good understanding of the purpose of cards.

 

Also, if you're trying to build your credit and make good habits, only put charges on your card if you have the funds to pay it off.

As long as you pay before the due date, you won't pay any interest, assuming you didn't carry a balance from the previous statement cycle.

 

The amount that is on your statement balance is what gets reported to the credit bureaus.

So if you want it to report as 1% utilization, pay an amount before the statement cuts such that it will be 1% of your credit limit.

 

 


EX08: 731 | EQBankcard08: 752 | TU08: 803 | Total Utilization: 1% | Total Credit Limit: $26,900
Message 2 of 10
New Contributor

Re: Girlfriend upset I got credit cards

I noticed for ex.. sometimes I pay so early that i will pay off the current balance but the next day the pending charges show up again for the current balance.
EQ:652 TU:630 EX:649 as of 6/17/16
Message 3 of 10
Valued Member

Re: Girlfriend upset I got credit cards

If she has great credit and paying her bills then  she should understand. If not, you can try educating her about the importance of credit. Paying every month and having low balance every month will def help your scores. Has she been burned in the past with cards?

Message 4 of 10
Frequent Contributor

Re: Girlfriend upset I got credit cards

This is becoming a growing problem with millenials. All lot of the younger ones, especially (the under 25 crowd - I'm over) have seen older people get into trouble with debt and have shunned credit cards entirely. She cares so she doesn't want to see you get into debt, because that's how large piles of debt start - a little bit at a time. If you're always paying your balances off in full, you can explain to her that carrying a balance isn't an option for you. It's easier to get through the financial world with a credit score, and maybe you can also explain to her why you want one. Like you want a good rate on a mortgage one day or you want the best possible rates on insurance, things like that. 

 

My husband doesn't use credit cards, but I recently started using them again, and neither of us have a problem with the other's decision. We both got overextended in the past. He doesn't trust himself, so no cards for him. But we already have a mortgage and while I'm sure we'll move one day, the status of our mortgage alone is enough for us to get another one without any problems. So there isn't a huge need for either of us to be super concerned about our scores anymore. But my family hit the roof when I even mentioned getting a credit card again. Repeatedly telling me it was dumb and super sad that I even wanted one. I don't see the big deal. They were never in debt, so I don't even understand why they are flipping out so much, because none of them know exactly how much debt we were in, not even close. I think they just don't trust me, but luckily I can do whatever I want, except talk to them about it. 

 

So, I think if you can make it clear to her that you understand debt is horrible and you want no part in that, maybe that will help calm her down. I told my husband that if I try to carry even a $1 balance, he has my permission to chop up my cards and force me to cancel them. Smiley Happy

♠Queen of Spades♠
Message 5 of 10
Established Contributor

Re: Girlfriend upset I got credit cards

Not to be nosy, but do you know her history well? It could be she witnessed someone she cared about (family member?) get into CC debt trouble and it affected them/her. IF that were the case, explaining your strategy and that you don't spend what you can't pay off might go a long way. Explain the benefits of good credit when applying for an apartment, job, mortgage, etc. and let her know you are cultivating a healthy relationship with credit with an eye toward the future.

 

I'd think if she understands you intend to use credit as a tool, in a healthy and responsible way, she wouldn't be so alarmed.

 

FWIW, my first though, tbh, is that she's or someone near to her has been through something traumatic with credit.

Replanted a seedling 5/9/2015.
Message 6 of 10
Valued Contributor

Re: Girlfriend upset I got credit cards

All you can do is just explain to her the situation. But even more, as often as possible, show her the positive results as well as the doors they are opening buy growing your credit profile.
Message 7 of 10
Community Leader
Senior Contributor

Re: Girlfriend upset I got credit cards


MikeB4 wrote:

I'm sure someone has delt with this before.... So the first card she got mad over.. my Cap 1.. then today I went to pay at a restaurant and they did not take Discover at first she did not really question it.. It was only when i was on the phone did I say something how it makes the quick app on the iphone turn blue and she went full on upset about that.

 

Long story short she thinks I'm going to go into debt with the cards but I'm using it to build my credit up.. So far my numbers are the highest it's ever been I was a little over 90% on my Cap 1 but I paid $200 on it to bring it under 50% both I have paid before any due date has shown up.

 

So I wonder how to handle this?


  Pay In Full

 

  You will never have anything to defend if you are actually making money using cards. 

 

 


Message 8 of 10
Valued Contributor

Re: Girlfriend upset I got credit cards

My DW got mad at me at first, she told me she felt like I was going to go into too much debt with how I like to spend. I simply told her that I would never do that and I explained to her I want to build my credit, she had 30k cards when we had this talk to when I told her it's embarrassing that I have to use her AU cards to pay at restaurants, travel, etc she told me okay and I never heard of it again.
Message 9 of 10
New Contributor

Re: Girlfriend upset I got credit cards

They always want whats best for us but sometimes don't understand that what we do is good when there are some complexaties. Not understanding credit is normal without an explanation and the fact that debt is bad makes people concerned.

TU:760 07/08/17 Synchrony--EX: 747 08/03/17 Discover--EQ:756 06/27/16 Citi--Gardening since 08/01/17
Active:
Bank of America Bankamericard (Better Balance Rewards MC, Cash Rewards VS), Blispay V, Capital One Quicksilver VS, Chase(AARP VS, Amazon Prime VS), Citi Double Cash WMC, Citizens GreenSense MC, Discover It, FedEx Employee Credit Association V, Paypal Credit, US Bank Cash+, Walmart MC
Wishlist: Chase Freedom, Citi Dividend, EBates, Marvel, Security Service Power Travel Rewards, Vantage West Connect Rewards
Message 10 of 10