How do you change your name with the bureaus? Or do you?

[haulingthescoreup]

OK, this is also for women who've gotten married and anyone who has a new name for whatever reason.

I'm in the process of getting my name changed on my cards (entertaining enough), and I thought I'd go ahead and do the same with the CRA's. I have spent the last 25 minutes on Equifax's voice mail, while online at the same time, finally talking to a human. The human said that I have to dispute my married name. Well, first of all, it's not wrong, it's just my old name. I don't want all my history under my name for the last 29 years to get screwed up. Secondly, they want a copy of my DL, my SS card, and a utility bill. OK, the DL is in the new name, but I'm still waiting on the SS card, and the utility bills are in DXH's name. I said, What about my new DL and a copy of the final decree, ordering the name change? She said, sure, those will work. Well, maybe.

I know perfectly well that I didn't do all this when I first got married and changed my name, and somehow the info showed up. What do people do nowadays? Should I just wait for my existing accounts to start reporting with my new name, and let it appear in that way?

[recoverychick]

Hi, Hauling.  I thought I wanted to do the same thing when I got divorced, but it was just too much of a pain.  Since everything reports by SSN, the history will just start showing up on your report with every name or form you ever received credit in (like using a middle initial or a maiden name with your married name).

If you can, try not to worry about it and focus on moving forward with  great new life.  Even when the divorce is your choice, it's a struggle, but it's definitely better than staying in a truly bad marriage.  Good luck and for the tough times, get yourself a download of Gloria Gaynor's "I Will Survive" also known as the unofficial divorced woman's anthem.  It will also (if you're old enough) make you remember how much fun disco was!

All good things and God Bless!

[haulingthescoreup]

lol, thanks, we can all use some Gloria every now and then! And thanks for the good wishes as well.

I think you're right about just letting the new name appear on its own. The idea of disputing a name I had for 29 years rattled me.

[woopah]

As a single woman who has never changed her name, I have no idea about the name change with your CRA, but my mother found out the hard way that it's not easy to change your name back after a divorce.  Her divorce decree allowed her to change her name back to her maiden name, but she chose to wait a few years, as she was trying to lessen the blow to my brother and I, her adult children. 

When she eventually began the name change, she found difficulties with her DL, her SS card, and everything else you can imagine.  She had to close all of her bank accounts, including her mother's because the bank would not allow her to change her name, even though she then had a new DL a new SS card, and the divroce decry.  She had to go to a new bank, since that bank would not let her open any accounts in her new name.  Every time she went somewhere to change her name, including the SS office and on her DL she stated it was like an inquisition with people saying she wasn't allowed to change her name, her proof was too old, etc...

I still find that funny, as anyone can go to a courthouse and legally change their name, but that if you get divorced it becomes nearly impossible with people talking about what you are and aren't allowed to do.  

Makes me think those women that keep their maiden names might have the right idea.

[haulingthescoreup]

I really do think that women who run into this difficulty ought to utter the phrase "sex discrimination" to those who are throwing up these obstacles, and see if the pencil-pushers maybe settle down.

Because guess what? --if you get a new name because you got married, the world coos at you, and congratulates you, and tells you exactly what to do and how to do it. It shouldn't be any different if the name change results from a divorce. Guys don't go through this, unless they suddenly want to rename themselves Sir Gawain Proudfeather or some such. FWIW, I haven't had the slightest bit of static from my CCC's or my bank. The driver's license office was a royal PITA, we don't even want to talk about Social Security, and dear Lord, there's always Human Resources...

[recoverychick]

What's really crazy is that in a divorce, you have to petition the court for the use of your previous name after the divorce.  A few seconds after the judge granted my divorce, my attorney entered a request for use of my maiden name.  It was immediately granted and I got an order allowing me to use it.  I didn't go back to using it because it was just too much of pain to get things changed.  It just wasn't worth the effort. 

What's wrong with this picture?

[haulingthescoreup]

My name change is part of the divorce decree, and official agencies (drivers license bureau, HR, Social Security) want a copy of the decree. Well, I'll give them the first page, which orders the change, and the last page, with the judge's signature. They're not getting the whole thing, because it's none of their business. Even what's on the two pages that I let them see contains info that's none of their business.

It sounds as though your name change wound up on a separate piece of paper. If so, that's great. You don't have to share other details of your final decree.

lol, got my new USAA cards today, but the card printing company muffed my middle initial (USAA has it right), and for some reason, they sent two copies of the MC. (Just one of the AmEx.) Umm, why did you print and send me two copies?

Waiting for the next set to come in the mail.

[recoverychick]

You're right.  It was a separate order.  Attorney did it that way.  I didn't even know I had to petition.