My good friend from work.. he's a smart guy... in some aspects. I've been working with this guy closely for over a year now and we frequent do stuff outside of work as well as other co-workers. He got into a relationship last july/august (9-10 months ago) and he's a full time 21 year old worker and shes a 21 year old college senior graudating with $100k in debt going into a retail job with no relevance to her degree what so ever(waste of a degree???). My friend is very clingy when it comes to his gf, he pays for EVERYTHING when it comes to the two of them. He has his own trailer and he's talking about moving her in and he's going to help her with her student loans. My girlfriend and I split everything just about evenly even though shes a junior in college and i'm a full time worker. I tell him that he shouldn't be taking on all her financial responsibilies because that's a heavy strain on him now absorbing the financial burden of two people. When I ask him about it, he constantly assures that's him being a "good boyfriend" and that's what boyfriends are supposed to do. I am predicting a not so happy ending result of that relationship. My friend is a very "proud" person, as well as a know it all/my way is the best way kind of person. I do acknowledge the fact that it's his life not mine and it doesn't affect me, and I do respect that, I guess I am concerned as I friend. Considering I am 20 years old and have never been in a relatinship to the point where finances are a shared part of the relationship, I am looking for everyone's opinion on what they think of my friend's mindset and his financial decisions towards his relationship.
Education is expensive, so are life lessons.
Thanks, I'm typically one for getting too involved in other people's business. I totally agree with you, gotta let people live their own lives how they wish to.
I was your friend several years ago. No matter what any one told me; best friends, coworkers, family - I did not listen. Always did my best to put my gf through private college and pay for everything while getting myself in debt. Relationship ended and while she offered to pay for some of the debt accumulated (au), she argued the other several thousands were my choice. My sister (an attorney) told me she was right and to do my best to get myself out of my own hole. I’m happily married to my DW now and she was very supportive but also brutally honest with me and helped me improve my money management.
Point is, your friend will have to learn the way they choose - which, if it involves emotions, will be the hard way.
Point is, your friend will have to learn the way they choose - which, if it involves emotions, will be the hard way.
My current girlfriend seems to have a solid understanding of finances and the importance of them, she makes wise decisions, but I think if she started racking debt like crazy or tried to have me buy everything, it would definitely be a deal breaker. If I ever get a DW, she has to be on the same page as me financially.
@800who wrote:My current girlfriend seems to have a solid understanding of finances and the importance of them, she makes wise decisions, but I think if she started racking debt like crazy or tried to have me buy everything, it would definitely be a deal breaker. If I ever get a DW, she has to be on the same page as me financially.
Every couple does it their own way. Make certain that you have this conversation with whomever that lucky DW might be, and as long as the two of you communicate with eachother, you'll be fine. 