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I ruined my husband's credit and he doesn't know it

Established Contributor

Re: I ruined my husband's credit and he doesn't know it

Be truthful about everything. The truth shall set you free 

Message 11 of 27
Established Contributor

Re: I ruined my husband's credit and he doesn't know it

Yes! Over time his credit will improve. Are you employed? Do you have a source of income that you can get these paid down? $11,000 is not insurmountable, you said you have defaulted, how so. Did you stop making payments? Are some cards or Accts in Collection?
Message 12 of 27
Established Member

Re: I ruined my husband's credit and he doesn't know it

how could he not know you have done this,i check my cards many times a day. if my wife would had done this to me, knowing how much pride i take in keeping my credit score good, there would be a divorce coming, but to each there own .

Message 13 of 27
Community Leader
Super Contributor

Re: I ruined my husband's credit and he doesn't know it


mlm75 wrote:

how could he not know you have done this,i check my cards many times a day. if my wife would had done this to me, knowing how much pride i take in keeping my credit score good, there would be a divorce coming, but to each there own .


There are many people that don't pay attention to their credit so that could be the case here.  But I hear you and if my other half did that to me secretly, they'd rue they even tried. Everyone is different...

Message 14 of 27
Frequent Contributor

Re: I ruined my husband's credit and he doesn't know it


ABCD2199 wrote:
You can't fix it, you can only come clean and accept whatever the penalties are. He has to fix it himself.

Since they were fraudulently opened he can fix them by informing the police and having the accounts shut down, but there may be penalties for you there.


This can be filed with law enforcement as an unknown perp... since it wasn't made known at the time. But, there is a risk to filing and then finding out it was your spouse.

 

Ultimately though, I think if you're married, you cannot technically accuse your spouse of fraud... because they are purportedly legally allowed to represent you.

 

This is why you freeze your credit reports... or why you don't get married.

Message 15 of 27
Super Contributor

Re: I ruined my husband's credit and he doesn't know it

I'm not a lawyer but being married doesn't give you power of attorney for another person.  Same goes for parents and kids.

06/13/2018: FICO 821 EQ 814 TU 808 EX
Message 16 of 27
Frequent Contributor

Re: I ruined my husband's credit and he doesn't know it

The beauty of being married is that you don't even need power of attorney to legally & financially speak for your spouse.

This is why it's so difficult to unwind such a union.

People find out all the time in divorce court that there is very little recourse once their spouse has raided the accounts.

Whether it should be legal is a different discussion entirely.
Message 17 of 27
Established Contributor

Re: I ruined my husband's credit and he doesn't know it


Yes-Its-Me wrote:

mlm75 wrote:

how could he not know you have done this,i check my cards many times a day. if my wife would had done this to me, knowing how much pride i take in keeping my credit score good, there would be a divorce coming, but to each there own .


There are many people that don't pay attention to their credit so that could be the case here.  But I hear you and if my other half did that to me secretly, they'd rue they even tried. Everyone is different...


 This is likely the case...   We all have to remember, we are hyper-active when it comes to credit.  The average person MIGHT review their statements at the end of the month, and that's it.  Many couples (married and otherwise) have one person "in charge" of the finances, and the other has minimal involvement.  My wife's parents are like that... Her mother pays all the bills and her father doesn't pay much attention as long as his credit card works to buy lunch and tools once in a while.

 

 Not having had that situation happen to me where my credit was ruined by a spouse, I'm not sure how I would react.  I suspect it would greatly depend how I found out about it, what the money was spent on and her attitude towards the situtation once I knew.  I can envision a scenario where it wouldn't lead to a divorce, but it would certainly be the end of letting her have access to any of my personal accounts.  I most likely any joint accounts without careful monitoring.

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Current FICO 8 Scores: EQ: 728 | TU: 736 | EX: 726


Message 18 of 27
Established Contributor

Re: I ruined my husband's credit and he doesn't know it

Offer him some food first have a sit down and explain simple.

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Message 19 of 27
Valued Contributor

Re: I ruined my husband's credit and he doesn't know it


mlm75 wrote:

how could he not know you have done this,i check my cards many times a day. if my wife would had done this to me, knowing how much pride i take in keeping my credit score good, there would be a divorce coming, but to each there own .


This happened to me, but a little different. While I was in college and oblivious with credit my dad opened up and $100K in debt in my name. I was away so I never say any statements. I graduated and came home to lawsuit letters from BOA and a few other creditors. I had to file BR because of it in 2012. I've come a long way and it's one thing I'll probably never forget or forgive. 

 

Now to the OP, if I was married to you I wouldn't be able to deal with that. I couldn't imagine my wife doing this to me. That would be the end. He's going to be battling this for 7 years and the first few are going to be the worst. It's completely unfair to him and you've put him in a very tough financial position. Just being real. 

 

I hope he's more forgiving than I would be. You need to come clean because it's going to be even worse if he tries getting a loan or CC and gets denied only to find out what you did. You certainly at worst need to pay off all the debts and beg for forgiveness everyday. 

 

With that said. We make mistakes and I truly hope you get through it. Good luck! 

Message 20 of 27