Advice

jbsilva21 · ‎12-13-2018

So yesterday a good friend of mine got fired. I have known her for about a year and I believe her to be a hardworking and honest person. So yesterday she called me crying and upset because she had just been fired. She told me that the doctor she works for did not get change for the office. When a cash customer needed change the doctor was doing a procedure and she did not want to interrupt him. She took the money from his wallet for a total of $8 for the change. She told me that the doctor had misplaced cash before. Anyway she said he had her on camera taking the $8 and she had forgotten to mention it. Now I know her and I myself have been a law enforcement officer so my way of thinking is different. I want to believe her and I really feel that she is telling the truth. But my question to all of this is, how does she go about explaining this to a prospective employer? She is worried obviously about finances and I have offered to pay for 2 months rent direct to her landlord but I really feel bad for her and I don't have any advice for her on the job situation. She has been working really hard to pay off debt and not live paycheck to paycheck. She has finanlly gotten 3 weeks of her pay saved up. Anyway thanks for reading and I hope that someone out there can tell me some advice to give her.

Anonymous · ‎12-13-2018

How long do you know her? Just 1 year? How confident you are about her character?

What she did, is either dumb, or criminal. Amount of cash is not a problem. Neither explanation will portray her in a good light.

If you are entirely sure about her being good, offer to write letters for her application to other positions.

If you are not sure, you may want to stay away.

jbsilva21 · ‎12-13-2018

Well as I said. I was an law enforement officer and 1 of the panel interview questions was, You are the owner of a business. You have an employee that you have known and employed for many years. The employee lives a modest life and in a moment of weakness took a small amount of money from your business. You caught the employee and the employee apologized. This is the first infraction of any kind. Do you fire the employee or reprimand and let the employee continue working? My answer was fire them. When asked I said this was only the first time they were caught. This is why I am having a hard time with it. I want to believe her but old habits die hard. I will help her with the rent and nothing else. I told her the same. Its not about the money at all. Its trust and violation of trust is hard to repair. She is a good person and this I know. I am a pretty good judge of character but my experience has told me that you never really know someone. I have seen and heard things that you just cannot believe. I am gonna talk with her again and see if I figure out if she is a good liar or if what she says is true.

Anonymous · ‎12-13-2018

Honestly, you are probably better at reading people than anybody here. So I would say use your judgment and stay within certain perimeter.

We all have been through these, it's hard to tell if somebody is worth helping or not, all you can rely on, is your own experience with him/her and hope for the best outcome.

marty56 · ‎12-15-2018

Years ago I was in a situation at a allergy doctors office were I paid cash from time to time and the person I had seen for 2 years sometimes pocketed the cash. She was very friendly to me and I never in a million years ever thought she would be doing that. It wasn't a lot of money which for some reason made it worse to me. I got played and it could happen to you too in situations like this. If you were my family member I would say stay away.

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Anonymous · ‎12-15-2018

@jbsilva21 wrote:
WI am a pretty good judge of character but my experience has told me that you never really know someone. I have seen and heard things that you just cannot believe. I am gonna talk with her again and see if I figure out if she is a good liar or if what she says is true.

Trust your gut. In my work (a welfare caseworker), I have heard more b/s stories and outright lying then I could ever imagine. I can't even begin to think of some of the stories you hear. I try to look for the best in people, but in all the jobs I've ever worked I would never even THINK of taking $$ from the owners wallet without express permission. I think she made a mistake, a big one and she needs to learn from it. In her case I'd say her best answer to a prospective employer would be to tell them exactly what she told you (odds are most employers would follow up w/ her old boss anyway and hear what HE has to say).

jbsilva21 · ‎12-15-2018

Thanks everyone. I sat down and “interrogated” her a bit and she is keeping to her version. I told her to just be honest and somebody will give her a shot. She already has an interview so we will see how it goes.

Jb

Anonymous · ‎12-17-2018

@jbsilva21 wrote:
But my question to all of this is, how does she go about explaining this to a prospective employer?

She doesn't. No reason to bring this up IMO and by law her previous employer is not allowed to say anything negative if he is contacted for a reference.

Kree · ‎12-17-2018

@Anonymous wrote:
@jbsilva21 wrote:
But my question to all of this is, how does she go about explaining this to a prospective employer?
She doesn't. No reason to bring this up IMO and by law her previous employer is not allowed to say anything negative if he is contacted for a reference.

I was going to say the same thing last week, but went to google to find a law to reference. (I wanted to make sure it was federal and not state based.) and I found very little information. I think a few states have laws concerning this, but I think the "Employers can only verify X information and not say anything negative" is not factual, outside those few states.

I only spent about 15 minutes looking, so I could still be wrong. Do you happen to have any reference for your statement, or was it a nugget of knowledge in the back of your head like it was for me?