Road Rage...

[Anonymous]

Saturday night my daughter & I went over to my mothers to watch a movie with her. We paused & rewound the movie a few times and I thank god now that we did. After the movie was over we immediately got up kissed my mother told her goodnight and left. We got less that a 1/2 a mile from my mothers house and found a man laying in the middle of the road on top of broken car lights & glass. The truck he was driving was about 40 yards away with another man that was with the man laying in the road. No other cars were there. My daughter has always had a sheltered  life so to speak, so when we came upon this she immediately freaked out, could not breathe and asked me to leave. Of course I couldn't do that so I called 911 and then called my mother to come get my daughter. My mother was more worried that it could have been a prank so she paniced and rushed over. After a few other people stopped and the authorities finally got to the scene and were able to get some information from the man that was a passenger in this truck, we found out this was an act of road rage and the man had been shot. There was another car that had cut this truck off, the truck then went around this car and hit his brakes causing the car to rearend the truck. The driver of the car got out and shot this man 6 times! I didn't know the man had been shot when I first got there, I assumed he was just injured in the accident. People that had got there before the authorities did, found gun shell casings in the road. I could tell the man was deceased when we first got there so I stayed back about 15 - 20ft and tried to calm my daughter until my mother got there. When the police got there I asked if I could go get my daughter and that I couldn't provide any information. He said anyone that was around the man couldn't leave without giving their information and a statement. I told him that I stayed back 15 - 20 ft because that was not an image I wanted to see when I went to sleep, that I only stayed because we found him and to block the road so that no one would run them over since the speed limit is 55mph but people tend to do 65 & 70 on this road. He asked if I could stay until more authorities arrived to block that end of the highway and he would have them let me through, and he did.The police did an excellent job in catching the shooter, he was picked up and charged with murder Sunday.Even though I kept a distance away from this man I have had trouble sleeping and wake up with the worst dreams I've ever had in my life.

I felt so compelled to share this story after reading HTSU's thread "Everyday People" and one of replies by LouMinotti.

"LouMinotti's" replies....... As a liberal I deplore violence. I won't say I'm a pacifist because that would be a big fat lie; if some intruder enters my home, I'm grabbing the big knife or the golf club to protect my family. But if someone shoots me the bird in traffic, I will mouth "I'm sorry" to diffuse the anger in that person. I will assume fault if it can lead to peace. Compassion works, compassion heals both the giver and the receiver.

I get aggitated with people's ignorance on the roadways as anyone else does. However I usually tend to ignore those people and not even look at them because you never know who is carrying a gun or has anger issues. I do believe with the rising gun crimes that anyone who appiles for a gun permit should have to also take an anger  management course of some sort. I'm sure a lot of gun owners out there would disagree with me.... but if it could save a life.... isn't it worth a try?

As a victim of spousal abuse (yes, I got out of that marriage) and a gun being involved I have never been fond of guns in my home. My now financee likes guns and it took 6 years to allow him to get one which stays locked up. If it weren't for it being a collectable I doubt I would allow it now. 

I don't know how this story would effect any who reads it but I do know the impact it has had on me, my daughter and my family....  My heart goes out to Hauling and all the people of TN!

Message Edited by Bran9192 on 07-31-2008 09:16 AM

[Anonymous]

I am so sorry you and your daughter had to witness that.

All I can say from experience, is, it will only get easier with time. If you have insurance that cover's counseling, it may be good for you both to go. Especially for your daughter.

Sometimes talking to someone to get it out there and who can offer advice and understanding (not that there could be much reasoning for this type of crime)  may help you both be able to rest better.

It is truly a shame these events happen.

[LouMinotti]

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@Anonymous wrote:

Sunday.I don't know how this story would effect any who reads it but I do know the impact it has had on me, my daughter and my family.... My heart goes out to Hauling and all the people of TN!

Message Edited by Bran9192 on 07-31-2008 09:16 AM

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Oh wow, that's just awful. As I said in the original folder that spurred this discussion, I had happened upon the body of Sara Ramos, a victim of the DC/MD sniper, before the police even arrived...If I had pulled into that shopping center 5 or 10 minutes earlier I could easily have been the target of the the snipers. That thought shook me to my core back then and for five weeks after as it took that long to catch them. I truly understand where you're coming from. I'm not going to say much WRT guns and who can or can't have them because I debate these things elsewhere and have been for over a decade. I'm sort of jaded and can't seem get overly passionate about the topic anymore as this is a constitutional issue and I can and have found myself on both sides of the fence.
Having said that, I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers that you take some kind of positive perspective out of your experience. It's all one can do, other than write your congressman and senators a strongly worded letter. ;-)
And oh, my name is Danielle (louminotti is a play on illuminati--I'm a conspiracy theorist and was tring to be clever I didn't plan on hanging around this much and it feels weird, folks calling me Lou)

[athensguy]

It's too bad. These things would be much easier to avoid if people were forced to prove their driving proficiency before being allowed to drive on public roads.

[MidnightVoice]

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athensguy wrote:
It's too bad. These things would be much easier to avoid if people were forced to prove their driving proficiency before being allowed to drive on public roads.

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Or maybe if they were forced to prove their common sense before being allowed to shoot guns on public roads 

[haulingthescoreup]

Bran, I'm so sorry for you and your daughter for having to go through this, but good for you for gritting your teeth and doing your part!

You should be aware that the factor that seems to create PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder) is not so much the original experience, but stuffing it inside and "soldiering on." This is one reason why it has a higher incidence in Vietnam veterans, as the country was so unsupportive of them when they returned, along with the military suck-it-up culture. It's also terribly common in sexual abuse victims, who didn't want to report the abuse, and therefore have no way of getting all the trauma and violent emotional reaction out of their systems.

It's very important to talk it out, as many times as is necessary, to keep traumatic memories from setting up permanent residence in your minds. Children especially have little perspective to help them deal with it, so I hope that both of you will take advantage of any kind of counseling available, and that you will also be able to use your Mom skills to make sure that she can process this and move on. Good luck to both of you, and thanks again for caring enough to do the right thing!

[Anonymous]

Thanks for all the kind words and support. I just want to point out that I don't want to come across as trying to start a gun debate... I personally don't like them in my home since I have children. So to all the gun owners out there I was just stating there needs to be more education and safety requirements when applying for permits. The reason I was compelled to share this experience with everyone was to back up HTSU's post.... be kind to everyone, smile or say something friendly to others because you never know what's going on in their lives and if they are in turmoil. I'm sure most of you have seen the movie Patch Adams.... and how he demonstrated how people reacted to a smile & kind words.

As for my daughter who is 16 yrs of age, she seems to be handling it well... she hasn't had any trouble sleeping. I do also want to point out that I kept my car a very safe distance so she wasn't able to see any details or blood. She knew there was a man laying in the road but didn't know the extent of the situation other than a car accident until the following morning when she seen it on the local news.I didn't tell her that it was a shooting that night because I didn't want her to worry about going to sleep with a gun man on the loose so close to home. I also let her talk to her friends on the phone later than I normally allow that night. We discussed the entire event after the newscast and she says to me... Mom everything happens for a reason and we will all die when the lord sees fit to take us and that she sees how dangerous road rage is and that people need to avoid or ignore an aggressive driver on the road when they are near. 

 I do have to say I agree with the common sense on the roads & usage of guns is a must for everyone's safety!

[LouMinotti]

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@Anonymous wrote:

I do have to say I agree with the common sense on the roads & usage of guns is a must for everyone's safety!

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I appreciate where you're coming from, I have a 16 year old daughter too and she is extremely sensitive. I also want to just mention that the reason people shoot me the bird in traffic is because I drive the speed limit. It's part of my strategy to improve gas mileage on my gas guzzling SUV which I just paid off and am stuck with until I feel I can afford to finance something more economical. Going the speed limit -- that is, doing 65mph on 65mph highway -- saves ten percent in fuel, it also pisses EVERYONE off, regrettably.

[haulingthescoreup]

Good for you, Lou, as long as you're not in the left lane!

Man, left-lane bandits drive me nuts. Some seem oblivious to the growing line of traffic behind them; others I could swear have decided to do citizen rolling roadblocks to enforce the speed limit. The next thing you know, people are passing them on the right, and everyone's headed toward a mell of a hess.

I'll politely stay behind them for several miles, not crowding them, but with my left-turn blinker on, telling them, "Excuse me! Trying to get by here!!!" Sometimes, after 4 or 5 other people roar by them on the right, they snap out of it and move over, but other times they stay grimly hunkered down.

Hope they never try to drive in Germany!

[Scamp]

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haulingthescoreup wrote:
Good for you, Lou, as long as you're not in the left lane!

Man, left-lane bandits drive me nuts. Some seem oblivious to the growing line of traffic behind them; others I could swear have decided to do citizen rolling roadblocks to enforce the speed limit. The next thing you know, people are passing them on the right, and everyone's headed toward a mell of a hess.

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At least as bad as the idiots going too slow to be in the left lane and clogging it are the speed-demon idiots who come screaming up behind you in that left lane and tear around you on the right without even giving you a chance to move over. 

I nearly hit one imbecile who did that, recently - I saw him coming and was about to shift lanes to let him by and realized that, instead of holding up at all to let me move out of his way, he had just maintained speed and was weaving around me on the right.

Another pet peeve, as a bicycle-riding commuter, are the dunderheads with four wheels and a motor who overtake me to the left of my little bike lane, only to turn right DIRECTLY in front of me, across my path of travel - and I mean directly; suddenly there's the broad side of a car a foot or bare inches in front of me and I'm just about laying my bike down trying to keep from hitting it   I've nearly t-boned more brainless car drivers that way...

Some days, I'm absolutely certain my bike, unbeknownst to me, came equipped with a Cloak of Invisibility.