So my fico 9 is in line with my expieran fico 8, but is almsot 35 points lower for Equifax - why this big difference
If I understand your question correctly, your EX and EQ FICO 8 and your EX FICO 9 scores are nearly the same but your EQ FICO 9 score is 35 points lower than the others.
Have you pulled copies of your Experian and Equifax reports and confirmed that the information on each is both accurate and complete? If not, you can go to https://www.annualcreditreport.com and get free copies of your reports, while at it you might as well also pull and check your Transunion report.
These 2 scoring models have different weightings for some scoring criteria so a reasonable 1st step is to check for discrepancies between your reports.
Agree that you should check your reports, and as pointed out above there are differences between FICO 9 and 8 scoring models, this thread has some detail that you should look at.
Has FICO released any data on how many lenders are using FICO 9 yet? I assume that it's growing, but it doesn't seem like it's used that often yet.