the above poster has a good point. If you do not have any of the down payment or the closing costs saved up, you are probably not in a position yet to buy. That is not to say you could not find a loan, but that you may be living above your means or wasting a bunch of money. IF you are unable to put enough money away for these items (at least half of the down payment and closing costs), what are you going to do when your furnace blows up, etc. The fact that your wife is not on the loan seems to point towards some credit issues (although of course there could be other reasons, but the norm for this is either no income or bad credit).
Getting a loan from a relative is not allowed, and if it is later determined that you got a "gift" from a relative and then had to pay it back, you could be charged for mortgage fraud.
Bridge loans are very spotty. Not everyone allows them or does them and they still can not count towards the minimum down payment. Also, they will want to see past tax records and stuff to make sure that you are not going to owe money this year prior todoing that even if you find a place the does them. They may also run tighter restrictions on the loans that they allow to use this with.
As far as seller paying closing costs, this is trending downward to some degree due to the tightening rules around appraisals. A seller never "includes" paying for closing costs, If you want closing costs paid, the seller exepcts to get market value for their house PLUS the closing costs as the selling price. Unfortunately, if the house will not appraise for that much then it is a mute point. Of course there are exceptions to this in cases when a seller needs to sell quick/etc but a year ago almost every deal I heard about was with seller paying full closing costs. Now it semms to be less and to be more restrictive. This is somewhat due to the new appraisal rules and somewhat due to the market not being in quite as much of a freefall now as it was I think.
