Cocktail -vs- formal for holiday party

[Anonymous]

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@Anonymous wrote:

The dress code says "Cocktail or Formal Attire" for women, "Suit or Black Tie" for men... eek! How cocktail is cocktail, and how formal is formal in NoVa?

When I think formal, I think evening gown, possibly a healthy dose of sequins on the thing. I think cocktail, and I see cocktail-length, but any variety of formality from coulda worn it to the office with a business jacket, to something by Dior... Very easy to end up being ridiculously over- or under-dressed, and I don't want to do that for DH's sake. His first big event as an exec at his new company (been there only 3 months).

Advice, please!

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WHERE in NoVa are we talking? Georgetown? Alexandria? Who else will be there? Politicos? Friends? DH's colleagues?

In my experience, the definition of "cocktail attire" is usually defined by the where's and the whos. If the fete is being thrown by a good friend who votes Left, you can let your style show as much as you like. If we're talking DH's work (government contracting, right?), then focus on classy and let your personal style peek through with accessories.

I TOTALLY see you being able to pull an Audrey Hepburn and be able to modify even the stuffiest style with flair and verve! Get funky enough with the accessories that you come off as "individual" or "confidently stylish" but still tight patootie enough to convince the bluenoses that you're one of "them!"

Just get a nice black number -- one that skims your body (since you DESERVE to look and FEEL sexy -- and **feeling** sexy will definitely be the best accessory you can have!) and have fun with the accessories! Accessories ALWAYS make the look!

FTR, I am fairly qualified to make those statements -- 2 years of Fashion Merchandising, 3 years modeling and 10 years "working" as a couture sewist!

[Anonymous]

Male opinion: Simple black dresses (backless, I think you call them) ALWAYS look classy. If there are 500 women in a room my eye always goes to the black dress. Of course, there are usually 498 black dresses, so I guess you ladies know what I like.

[llecs]

I talked to DW and she said to go with a cocktail dress. Her fashionista advice always trumps mine. In fact, when I told her what I told you, she ask me "what were you thinking?".

[Anonymous]

LOL llecs! 

When I asked DH, his response to all of this was "Well why don't you just wear the dress that you wore to the USMC ball two years ago?!" HA!!! (first, it's very light silver/gold and has barely-there straps that give it a very summery feel... definitely not winter-formal OR winter-cocktail friendly! second, I have had body "alterations" since then, so my new top half would shred that dress and then stand over it laughing maniacally).

Trying to decide between these:

1. http://www.chelseasofnewyork.com/Sequin_Top_Ruched_Halter_Gown_p/4220-p.htm (the slit will be altered to be more conservative)

2. http://www.chelseasofnewyork.com/Black_Cocktail_Gown_p/2495l-rb.htm

3. http://www.promgirl.com/shop/dresses/viewitem-PD381419 that I already own.. minus the rhinestones & plus a little cap sleeve detail -- but the ruching is the same.

[fishbjc]

Since you asked....Those first two are tacky and cheap looking.  The third one is cute, but needs a little jacket.

Since he's in an executive position, you want to appear classy and elegant. 

[fishbjc]

Please, avoid alcohol and look *under-stated*, a wife that makes an error can be the kiss of death for her husbands career.  I've seen this happen so many times.

[BeautifulBlueBoy]

I can't get over those first two......

[haulingthescoreup]

I agree with fish, and I'm not that wild about the third.

Don't go shopping in the Mother of the Bride department, but you need to be thinking subtle and elegant, not these.

[Anonymous]

Sorry, Ivy, but I'd have to agree with Fish and Hauling.

I would honestly advise you to head to the nearest newsstand and pick up a copy of Vogue. The current issue should have a few articles on party dresses (since, it tis the season, you know). Pick out the one you like bestest and head on out to your local department store ish in hand. You'll see oodles of knock-offs at reasonable prices.

Personally, I like Dillards for party-gear. They're reasonably priced, stylish and fairly current as to what's on the runways -- well, not RECENTLY on the runways, but you don't want runway (since the styles you'll find there are too .... extreme for us faint-hearted normal fashionistas.

The trick is to find something CLOSE to the current haute couture finds and take it down a couple of notches. Think Vera Wang (Lord knows there's oodles of knock-offs of her gowns). She's PERFECT for understated glam. And trust me, if your DH's colleagues wives are like OURS here, they'll swoon at a Vera knock-off and gossip about it the next day, wondering if it was REALLY a Vera Wang!!

[MsKiwi]

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@Anonymous wrote:

LOL llecs! 

When I asked DH, his response to all of this was "Well why don't you just wear the dress that you wore to the USMC ball two years ago?!" HA!!! (first, it's very light silver/gold and has barely-there straps that give it a very summery feel... definitely not winter-formal OR winter-cocktail friendly! second, I have had body "alterations" since then, so my new top half would shred that dress and then stand over it laughing maniacally).

Trying to decide between these:

1. http://www.chelseasofnewyork.com/Sequin_Top_Ruched_Halter_Gown_p/4220-p.htm (the slit will be altered to be more conservative)

2. http://www.chelseasofnewyork.com/Black_Cocktail_Gown_p/2495l-rb.htm

3. http://www.promgirl.com/shop/dresses/viewitem-PD381419 that I already own.. minus the rhinestones & plus a little cap sleeve detail -- but the ruching is the same.

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Since this is your first formal party with the new company I wouldn't wear any of the above dresses. Remember you are making first impressions (both of you)!  Keep it simple. A simple black dress; not too short, simple jewelry. Keep it understated and you can't go wrong. Above all tone it down, think Jackie O, Audrey Hepburn.