@inara220 wrote:Yikes... that is messed up.
I don't understand why people do these things. Why... when someone else is paying for your room and board, would you go out and get a new vehicle? I would have taken the bus before doing that!
What is crazy about the whole situation is she had a perfectly functioning car. 2010 Civic; low miles (under 50K), no mechanical issues of any kind. She was within 1 1/2 years of paying it off.
If she had a beater or a car that was having all kinds of issues, I maybe could have seen the rationale in getting another car. But even then, I wouldn't have advised getting a brand new car, especially since her other obligations were not being met. The whole thing still doesn't make sense to me. But she said she "fell in love" with the truck, so she had to have it.
One other humourous aside...after we broke up and she realized we would not reconcile, she sent me a long winded e-mail basically suggesting I should PAY HER some money because I sprang all of this on her (we'd been discussing this issue since March 2014), and she had not planned or put any money for rent or a deposit (I guess living 1 1/2+ years rent/utility free do not count). She told me she was incurring a lot of expenses that she did not have before (in part because of the new truck!), and I basically "owed" her for putting her out without notice (I gave her 60 days).
That e-mail went straight into the trash bin, where it belonged.
@inara220 wrote:Obviously she is still a child and expects other people to take care of her.
Might I suggest that the next person you date be an independent woman in her own right that doesn't need rescuing? Much easier to have a mutually beneficial partnership when both parties CAN stand on their own but CHOOSE to be together because they love and respect eachother.
Heh, I think that's a goal for most people on this forum.
Personally this and other situations are getting me to think on how I can recognize this issue earlier in the process. If people have ideas on that I'd love to hear them... finances are just too important in this day and age.
@DW: good job trashing that absurd request; hopefully she learns from this eventually but somehow I doubt it... suspect everything is someone else's fault in her life.
I agree! We need a MyFico Dating section! We can be matched on scores or credit goals, and then branch out to include religion/politics etc. Since most dating sites don't really discuss finances I'd bet it would result in more successful relationships! Though count me out, I'm happily married and my credit score is 50 points higher then my hubby's
@Pway wrote:i'm sorry but I say run, run, run while you ahead. Your girl friend is not financial responsible what so ever. These are the early stages and all the signs are spelled out for you on a silver platter. You putting your credit health on the line for her, I don't think so. I get you have been together for 2 1/2 years but I say you need to break this off. It may hurt but it's for the best. I'm a little upset when I began to read your post.
Way ahead of ya, Pway! 
I first posted in March 2014...time and circumstances eventually made me come to my senses. We did call it quits last November (see above posts).
THANK GOD I did not follow my inital instinct and co-sign a debt consolidation loan!
@hapagrrl wrote:Hey, Dw -- OMG!! "you let me live for free and paid for everythingfor me, so now you gotta keep paying me .." to what? Breathe? Good LORD. Some people have GALL. Hate to tell ya, but it sounds like you were dating a cr*ck smoker, lol!
Well, my indignation aside, congrats on going with your gut and doing what's right for you -- and saving yourself from years of misery.
@Revelate - I think I don't know how we could recognize these kinds of folks.. Except to say that Fico should seriously consider branching out and creating a dating version of the forums/a dating site. Think about it - most of us have our scores in our siggies, so - no secret there. And we are honest about our situation, and if it's not great (ahem), then we here ask for advice on achieving our goals, getting good scores or maintaining good scores or you know, going on app sprees, lol. Anyway, everything is pretty much up front: where we are now, the lessons we've learned from past mistakes, what our goals are, etc. The downside is, I'm guessing it won't take long for it to go downhill real quick (some people just HAVE to make things icky) -- the moderators would definitely have their jobs cut out for them -- but.. seems like if it could be "kept clean," it'd be a good option to explore..?
I LOVE the dating site idea! People would have tag lines like "Hey baby...I've got a 780 score...holla at your boy!".
As far as keeping it "clean", good luck with that on an internet dating site! It's hard enough for the mods to keep things civil on here I can only imagine what type of pictures will start popping up on the Siggys!!!!
@DW -- alrighty-then: thanks for the icky mental images of potential crazy-a** siggies.. ewwwww!!! LOL! Oh, well - one can always dream. 