Constant gripes with individual lenders

[iced]

---

@Remedios wrote:

On a serious note, it's not about "congrats" 

What I'm talking about would be the equivalent of me jumping in every time NFCU is mentioned only to say how much they suck because I cannot become a member simply because I'm not eligible. Must be lender's fault I do not meet the criteria. 

Or jump every time BoA is mentioned because they denied me 15 years ago. That must mean they suck, and everyone should be warned that they suck.  It must be their fault I had 30 day lates at that time. It cannot be me! 

Right? 

---

My theory: It's Little Man Cancel Culture.

"Hi, I'm a little insignificant person in the world, but I feel much more important than I am so I don't take kindly to rejection. Since I can't swear at them the way I do prospective dates who reject me, I'm going to jump on a forum and bad mouth them repeatedly in hopes that I can stir up enough similar sentiment from fellow little insignificant people like me that we can have a meaningful impact on the bank who rejected us. Then they'll be really regretful that they rejected us, cry, and come crawling back to us hat-in-hand begging for us to like them again. That'll teach them we're really big significant people!"

[longtimelurker]

---

@simplynoir wrote:

---

@iced wrote:

---

@longtimelurker wrote:

---

---

(Actually, the thing I never got is why people like/want "Congrats" from people that they don't really know when they manage to get a card or a CLI.  But then I never did get community spirit)

---

So much this. It's like people crave affirmation from digital strangers, and, like you, I find the concept foreign and occasionally irritating.

---

There are a lot more things I find "occasionally irritating" than something harmless like that

---

And that's probably true for @ iced as well, but doesn't mean that this isn't irritating!

[iced]

---

@simplynoir wrote:

---

@iced wrote:

---

@longtimelurker wrote:

---

---

(Actually, the thing I never got is why people like/want "Congrats" from people that they don't really know when they manage to get a card or a CLI.  But then I never did get community spirit)

---

So much this. It's like people crave affirmation from digital strangers, and, like you, I find the concept foreign and occasionally irritating.

---

There are a lot more things I find "occasionally irritating" than something harmless like that

---

When it sidetracks a thread because people just have to say congrats or thanks, it can get irritating.

It's why I personally avoid the Credit Card Approvals section entirely. If I find I need self-affirmation, I'll go put on some Al Franken videos and sit in front of the mirror.

[seattletravels]

---

@Remedios wrote:

This kinda gets on my nerves, so I'm just going to throw it out here...

Why is it that some cannot get over denial and percieved "grief" they were given by the lender to the point of airing their displeasure in every thread..

I just looked in approvals, and in one particular thread, there were multiple consecutive posts were others were complaining about their experiences,  without even bothering with "congrats" or whatever. 

I understand being salty when denied, but I dont understand the constant need to relive it, and doodoo on parades of those who do not share the experience 

---

Amex says 👋 lololol

[wasCB14]

---

@iced wrote:

---

@simplynoir wrote:

---

@iced wrote:

---

@longtimelurker wrote:

---

---

(Actually, the thing I never got is why people like/want "Congrats" from people that they don't really know when they manage to get a card or a CLI.  But then I never did get community spirit)

---

So much this. It's like people crave affirmation from digital strangers, and, like you, I find the concept foreign and occasionally irritating.

---

There are a lot more things I find "occasionally irritating" than something harmless like that

---

When it sidetracks a thread because people just have to say congrats or thanks, it can get irritating.

It's why I personally avoid the Credit Card Approvals section entirely. If I find I need self-affirmation, I'll go put on some Al Franken videos and sit in front of the mirror.

---

I've not read these offending posts, but how can an approval sidetrack an approvals thread? It's relevant information, and others seem to believe there is no initial substance to sidetrack?

The "congrats" side is a bit odd, I agree. It's one-size-fits-all (with a few "nice SL" modifiers) with little regard for the appropriateness of the cards. If I posted approvals for store cards I don't shop at that give little value, I doubt there would be any appropriate replies (along the times of, "How drunk were you at the time?").

I usually share as an update if I've asked questions about the card or application process.

[Anonymous]

---

@seattletravels wrote:

---

@Remedios wrote:

This kinda gets on my nerves, so I'm just going to throw it out here...

Why is it that some cannot get over denial and percieved "grief" they were given by the lender to the point of airing their displeasure in every thread..

I just looked in approvals, and in one particular thread, there were multiple consecutive posts were others were complaining about their experiences,  without even bothering with "congrats" or whatever. 

I understand being salty when denied, but I dont understand the constant need to relive it, and doodoo on parades of those who do not share the experience 

---

Amex says 👋 lololol

---

Yep. Even though it was all sarcasm, it was only visible to those who actually knew it was sarcasm. 

All of us have lenders we don't like. BECU just happened to have recently pissed off more of us. 

I would like to point out the same thing happens with any lender who ticks people off. Like every single Capital One thread has at least two people saying to find another option because of the triple pull. Credit One threads always have someone who slams them for being subprime. Chase threads always have someone slamming them for 5/24. It's not personal on the part of the FI but that doesn't change the fact that it's human nature to ward off people from making the same mistake they did. It's a habit and not an easy one to break. 

I agree that macinjosh's thread got totally derailed but my initial comment did in fact congratulate him and I assumed he was already aware of the BECU verification since I was very active in the garden thread last year and very vocal when it happened to me. I didn't actually mean to have the thread derail. 

"Congrats on the approval! Hopefully you don't get tied up in the financial crimes unit now. 👍" 

That wasn't sarcasm and it was not meant to devolve like it did. I figured he already knew what I was talking about and it went south when he asked what financial crimes was. I even left the thread with unanswered questions like the one about people being told to go into a branch to try to avoid it devolving again. 

[K-in-Boston]

Whether one believes in community spirit or not, supporting each other whether it's by way of simply offering encouragement, relaying one's personal experience, providing data points, or even even answering the same questions time and again, is one of the primary reasons for these forums.

There are lots of people here who provide valuable data points on their approvals (and denials), and not everyone is looking for "congrats!" posts.  But that doesn't mean those approvals shouldn't be celebrated.  Many people here have worked very hard to build or rebuild.

[Brian_Earl_Spilner]

Expressing your displeasure with a lender is fine. It doesn't need to go on for multiple pages in multiple threads. And while I rarely go in the approvals section, it's meant to celebrate the approvals and increases as well as share datapoints. Starting up in one of them goes against what the subforum is for.

[Remedios]

How did this turn into discussion about "congrats" is beyond me. 

The only reason I used it as an example is because it seems off to totally 💩 on a parade. I could have used other examples,  but that one is fresh in my mind.

It's about bringing same issue, with same lender, in every thread, ad nauseam.  I do not care who frequents whichever subforum and what they do there. 

[Kforce]

---

@Remedios wrote:

How did this turn into discussion about "congrats" is beyond me. 

The only reason I used it as an example is because it seems off to totally 💩 on a parade. I could have used other examples,  but that one is fresh in my mind.

It's about bringing same issue, with same lender, in every thread, ad nauseam.  I do not care who frequents whichever subforum and what they do there. 

---

Congrats