I need to "garden" - but how do I keep from applying?

[sr383]

Love REI. The flagship store in Seattle is amazing. 

[Anonymous]

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@mgs2010 wrote:

I've posted before - I have wayyy too many credit cards. I've started closing some here and there but then it seems like I get the urge to apply for more. I just got approved for an amex blue cash everyday card on Saturday and since then I applied for another Amex everyday card and got approved for that too. I also started selling things on ebay and had an ad pop up for the paypal credit - submitted that and was approved for 3250. Then a few weeks ago, I applied for cabelas because I like the 9.99% on cabelas purchases and was approved for that too for 5k. HOW CAN I STOP MYSELF? It's a serious addicition and I NEED to stop. I legit have like 34 inquiries. Should I freeze my bureaus to keep myself from applying? Any advice from you long term gardeners out there? I really need to stop. I have way more credit than I will ever use but for some reason, seeing that "Congratulations, you're approved!" is just so thrilling to me. I can't explain it. I'm sure a lot of you out there have the same problem - at least I hope so...lol. Any tips you can give me would be great because I think this is really hurting my credit, though I haven't really had any issues getting approved for stuff - especially as of late - but that's no excuse. My EQ is 733 and I'm sure it would be a lot higher if I didn't have this application addicition. I need rehab or something, I swear...

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First off, congratulations on recognizing that there's a behavior you want to change.  Not many people can evalute themselves and acknowledge traits to change.  Believe it or not, you've taken the first and critical step to instituting control.  It's also important for you to know that you're not alone.  That thrill you describe is the release of endorphins and adrenaline when the stress of being evaluated climaxes in an approval for credit.  There's a sociological phenomena called social stratification whereby humans like to rank themselves against others in social groupings.  Credit cards have long been viewed as a status symbol indicating social rank.  Whether or not you agree with this practice it exists and is normal human behavior.  

We need to replace the thrill of accomplishment from credit card approvals with accomplishment elsewhere.  I don't know enough about you to make recommendations but you could try books, courses (udacity, codeacademy, local community college), social involvement (volunteering), hobbies, science experiments, investing, etc.  The goal is to provide you with more equitable sources of accomplishment.

You could also write a plan.  Decide what's most important to you credit wise such as no additional apps, increasing your credit limits, decreasing utilization, etc.  Write down your goals and what actions you're going to commit to in order to reach those goals.  Then decide upon milestones that require some effort but are otherwise achievable.  Research shows that once a plan is formed and written down you're magnitudes more likely to follow that plan.  It will also give you something to manage and self made accomplishments.

Realize you can control this behavior and set yourself upon the end result.  Good luck.

[wmweeza]

I felt myself starting to get addicted (even though it was just a couple of apps). You know what helped me? Seeing my scores rise, I am now TOTALLY addicted to growing my Fico score and AAOA. It's so much fun to get an alert that your score has changed, log in, and see 4 more points added!

I keep myself from apping because my main goal is another house in 2 years, what is your ultimate goal? Maybe keeping that in mind will help. Perhaps tape a picture to your desk that represents what you really want.

This isn't a "Level up" on a video game, if you need immediate gratification on an achievement though perhaps a video game is what you need! lol

[Anonymous]

Chase's 5/24 kinda helped me out with this problem. Having CSP as a goal pretty much stopped my apps. I also reassessed where my spend was going, which helped me realize that things are pretty much covered already so the impulse to app is just that, an impulse. The itch to app comes along but the funny thing is that (for me anyways) the desire for a given card leaves as quick as it came. So if I can reign in the impulsive-ness, I'll eventually be glad. Trying to be content with my current cards. I'm excited about the Costco Citi Visa (have the Amex already), so hopefully that'll keep any app desire at bay for a bit 

[Kevin86475391]

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@Anonymous wrote:

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@mgs2010 wrote:

I've posted before - I have wayyy too many credit cards. I've started closing some here and there but then it seems like I get the urge to apply for more. I just got approved for an amex blue cash everyday card on Saturday and since then I applied for another Amex everyday card and got approved for that too. I also started selling things on ebay and had an ad pop up for the paypal credit - submitted that and was approved for 3250. Then a few weeks ago, I applied for cabelas because I like the 9.99% on cabelas purchases and was approved for that too for 5k. HOW CAN I STOP MYSELF? It's a serious addicition and I NEED to stop. I legit have like 34 inquiries. Should I freeze my bureaus to keep myself from applying? Any advice from you long term gardeners out there? I really need to stop. I have way more credit than I will ever use but for some reason, seeing that "Congratulations, you're approved!" is just so thrilling to me. I can't explain it. I'm sure a lot of you out there have the same problem - at least I hope so...lol. Any tips you can give me would be great because I think this is really hurting my credit, though I haven't really had any issues getting approved for stuff - especially as of late - but that's no excuse. My EQ is 733 and I'm sure it would be a lot higher if I didn't have this application addicition. I need rehab or something, I swear...

---

First off, congratulations on recognizing that there's a behavior you want to change.  Not many people can evalute themselves and acknowledge traits to change.  Believe it or not, you've taken the first and critical step to instituting control.  It's also important for you to know that you're not alone.  That thrill you describe is the release of endorphins and adrenaline when the stress of being evaluated climaxes in an approval for credit.  There's a sociological phenomena called social stratification whereby humans like to rank themselves against others in social groupings.  Credit cards have long been viewed as a status symbol indicating social rank.  Whether or not you agree with this practice it exists and is normal human behavior.  

We need to replace the thrill of accomplishment from credit card approvals with accomplishment elsewhere.  I don't know enough about you to make recommendations but you could try books, courses (udacity, codeacademy, local community college), social involvement (volunteering), hobbies, science experiments, investing, etc.  The goal is to provide you with more equitable sources of accomplishment.

You could also write a plan.  Decide what's most important to you credit wise such as no additional apps, increasing your credit limits, decreasing utilization, etc.  Write down your goals and what actions you're going to commit to in order to reach those goals.  Then decide upon milestones that require some effort but are otherwise achievable.  Research shows that once a plan is formed and written down you're magnitudes more likely to follow that plan.  It will also give you something to manage and self made accomplishments.

Realize you can control this behavior and set yourself upon the end result.  Good luck.

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+1, Great advice!

My personal rule of thumb is to not app for a new card more than once per 1-2 years, and I actually don't find it particularly challenging.

I agree that it sounds like the issue is that you're seeking external validation from the credit card companies, which definitely I can see how that could happen if you've had a rocky credit past or are building for the first time. My advice would be to give yourself the validation. When you're looking at an application/mailer/ad or simply thinking about a card you don't have literally stop and say to yourself something like, "I know you want me and I could get approved for your card, but I don't need you and I already have lots of other great cards."

LOL, and the next time you get an approval (not that I'm encouraging you to go apply for something just to try this out) you could also take a screen shot of it and pull it up whenever you want to see, "Congratulations, you're approved!"

Good luck!

[Anonymous]

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@Kevin86475391 wrote:

I agree that it sounds like the issue is that you're seeking external validation from the credit card companies, which definitely I can see how that could happen if you've had a rocky credit past or are building for the first time. My advice would be to give yourself the validation. When you're looking at an application/mailer/ad or simply thinking about a card you don't have literally stop and say to yourself something like, "I know you want me and I could get approved for your card, but I don't need you and I already have lots of other great cards."

LOL, and the next time you get an approval (not that I'm encouraging you to go apply for something just to try this out) you could also take a screen shot of it and pull it up whenever you want to see, "Congratulations, you're approved!"

Good luck!

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"I know you want me and I could get approved for your card, but I don't need you and I already have lots of other great cards."

Kevin, I'm pretty sure you've broken up with me in the past. All I hear is "I know you want me & I could make you really happy, but I think we should end it because I've got a lot of other ladies lined up"

[jeffery581]

Re: 

felt myself starting to get addicted (even though it was just a couple of apps). You know what helped me? Seeing my scores rise, I am now TOTALLY addicted to growing my Fico score and AAOA. It's so much fun to get an alert that your score has changed, log in, and see 4 more points added!

I keep myself from apping because my main goal is another house in 2 years, what is your ultimate goal? Maybe keeping that in mind will help. Perhaps tape a picture to your desk that represents what you really want.

This isn't a "Level up" on a video game, if you need immediate gratification on an achievement though perhaps a video game is what you need! lol

That really helped. I plan on trying to get a mortgage for a second home soon.  Thank you.

[Meanmchine]

FWIW I think this thread would have been more effective if you placed it in the Gardening threads.  I too have the urge to binge but I set a near time goal for myself.  It is easier to say let me stay in the garden for a few months then it is to plan longr then that.  Try working up a CLI rotation schedule.  Worse comes to worse, take a three month alaskan cruise which has no wifi 
GL2U

[kdm31091]

Smaller chunks of time are definitely more doable for goals IMO. That applies not just to credit but to anything else in life. It's pretty hard to commit to something for 2 years because 2 years is a long time and a lot can happen/change.

If you want, start with two week no app stretches. When that becomes easy, go to a month at a time, then 3 months, etc.

[jeffery581]

CCAA.

LOL