Overwhelmed

[Fester82]

I am 41, and new to trying to get a hold of my finances.   Between trying to pay off cc's, my 401k.  Building a emergency fund, sometimes I feel life I'm in over my head and overwhelmed with all the directions my money has to go in.  There really isn't a question,  just ranting to people that would understand.  Thanks

[ghgirll40]

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@Fester82 wrote:

I am 41, and new to trying to get a hold of my finances.   Between trying to pay off cc's, my 401k.  Building a emergency fund, sometimes I feel life I'm in over my head and overwhelmed with all the directions my money has to go in.  There really isn't a question,  just ranting to people that would understand.  Thanks

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I recommend focusing on one thing at a time. I'm 42 and that's been my approach. Pay off cc's first, build an emergency fund 2nd, build 401k 3rd. The reason I approached it this way is because when I focused all my money on one thing at a time it was easier to make progress.

[SweetCreditObsession]

Don't beat yourself up. Start small and increase your savings and payments over time. You're ahead of many people because you're executing a plan.

Keep reading, learning, and you'll find yourself improving in time.

Best wishes!😀

[Yasselife]

@Fester82  I'm 39 and take this as a game for adults, meaning I find joy in checking my accounts on Mint app, seeing my emergency fund and credit file improvements, having goals like building good relationships with banks and CU... I understand it can be stressful sometimes though, try to have fun and you'll be even better at it.

Do you do everything electronically?

[JoeRockhead]

When I was 41 my financial life was a complete wreck, with an ugly divorce sprinkled on top for a little more added stress. The simple fact that you're focused and concerned about having a hold on everything speaks volumes. Sometimes you just have to stop, and breathe. Stay focused on what's important, and what isn't, it gets better, and easier as time goes on.  

[Fester82]

Thank you all for the support and advice. I appreciate it.

[LakeLife]

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@JoeRockhead wrote:

When I was 41 my financial life was a complete wreck, with an ugly divorce sprinkled on top for a little more added stress. The simple fact that you're focused and concerned about having a hold on everything speaks volumes. Sometimes you just have to stop, and breathe. Stay focused on what's important, and what isn't, it gets better, and easier as time goes on.  

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I was 47 and the same thing happened to me.  My ex and I were terrible with finances even though we made $200k between the two of us in 2008.  The housing market crashed after we purchased a 2nd home in Texas, so she could take her dream job there while I was stuck trying to figure out what to do with our house in Indiana.  18 months later, I finally sold the Indiana house (had to bring $9k to closing after owning it for 12 years) and joined her in Texas.  In the meantime, I had to take a $23k cut in pay to find a job in Texas.  A year after I joined her in TX, she asked for a divorce.  BTW, I left a federal job in Indiana and all the benefits that went with that including 17 years with the feds and my pension, leave, ect.  

After the divorce, I had to scramble to build a life for myself while paying $1,500 a month in child support.  I lived in my RV for three years in order to make ends meet.  I got a job with the Feds in California with a $13k pay raise in 2012, but still not up to my 2010 salary.  18 months after that I got a Fed job in the DC area that finally brought my salary up to where it had been.  Along the way I learned to live in minimal lifestyle and met a woman that lived the same.  We got marred in 2014 and have had an amazing run of it.  Two homes and a bunch of stuff later, and my credit has never been this good.  The opportunities as a Fed in the DC area have been amazing, and I'm making more than I ever dreamed I could.  

The point is, keep you head up, look for every opportunity there is out there, and find a partner like minded.  Chip away at it and good things will happen.  

Best of luck to the OP.

[Yasselife]

@LakeLife  I can relate to your story, thank you for sharing. Your current situation is my goal to attain in 10 yrs from now. Divorce and child support has put me in the hole but I'm surviving alright.

[JoeRockhead]

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@LakeLife wrote:

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@JoeRockhead wrote:

When I was 41 my financial life was a complete wreck, with an ugly divorce sprinkled on top for a little more added stress. The simple fact that you're focused and concerned about having a hold on everything speaks volumes. Sometimes you just have to stop, and breathe. Stay focused on what's important, and what isn't, it gets better, and easier as time goes on.  

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I was 47 and the same thing happened to me.  My ex and I were terrible with finances even though we made $200k between the two of us in 2008.  The housing market crashed after we purchased a 2nd home in Texas, so she could take her dream job there while I was stuck trying to figure out what to do with our house in Indiana.  18 months later, I finally sold the Indiana house (had to bring $9k to closing after owning it for 12 years) and joined her in Texas.  In the meantime, I had to take a $23k cut in pay to find a job in Texas.  A year after I joined her in TX, she asked for a divorce.  BTW, I left a federal job in Indiana and all the benefits that went with that including 17 years with the feds and my pension, leave, ect.  

After the divorce, I had to scramble to build a life for myself while paying $1,500 a month in child support.  I lived in my RV for three years in order to make ends meet.  I got a job with the Feds in California with a $13k pay raise in 2012, but still not up to my 2010 salary.  18 months after that I got a Fed job in the DC area that finally brought my salary up to where it had been.  Along the way I learned to live in minimal lifestyle and met a woman that lived the same.  We got marred in 2014 and have had an amazing run of it.  Two homes and a bunch of stuff later, and my credit has never been this good.  The opportunities as a Fed in the DC area have been amazing, and I'm making more than I ever dreamed I could.  

The point is, keep you head up, look for every opportunity there is out there, and find a partner like minded.  Chip away at it and good things will happen.  

Best of luck to the OP.

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Sounds awfully familiar @LakeLife , lol. Although I was left being a single parent, it seems we've traveled very similar paths. Always great to hear another success story as it serves as great inspiration, and proving that focus and persistance pays off. 

[AndySoCal]

@Fester82  I agree with what has already been said.  On the 401K depending on all your other financial circumstances I would make a suggestion. If your employer is making a matching contribution I would suggest you contribution ensures you receive the maxium amount matched. I call the amount matched free money.   If not now at some point in in the future.