Looking at my reports and questioning how they maths.
So, when I was young(er) and stupid(er), not that I've surpassed that by much, but I've opened accounts, closed accounts... Like most average non smart people do. Believe it or not, there was a time I did not know it's better to sock drawer and keep accounts open.
Long story short... I see some aged closed accounts creeping towards that 10 year mark. Normally I would judge things off of the closed date, so I do not have to think much about it. However, the next ones to fall off have a Status Updated date.
5/3 Bank
Opened: 2006.01 (16 years 3 months)
Closed: 2007.01
Last Reported: 2013.11 (8 years 5 months)
Syncb/Walmart
Opened: 2013.07 (8 years 8 months)
Closed: 2013.12
Status Updated: 2016.02 (6 years 2 months)
Is it safe to assume these will remain till the Status Update reaches that 10 year mark?
Or should I be more concerned because once these fall off my AAoA will drop drastically?
Syncb/Walmart
Opened: 2016.10 (5 years 6 months)
Closed: 2018.10
Status Updated: 2019.02 (3 years 2 months)
CommenityBank/Wayfair
Opened: 2016.11 (5 years 5 months)
Closed: 2019.08
Status Updated: 2019.08 (2 years 8 months)
How screwed am I?
The 5/3 is my anchor right now but once that's gone I'm going to be losing a lot of years. Is the Walmart that's behind it going to catch it and lessen the impact? Would it be possible to call 5/3 and ask them to look into my old account for (make up a reason) and somehow get them to renew my Status Updated date?
@Kahnawake007 wrote:Looking at my reports and questioning how they maths.
So, when I was young(er) and stupid(er), not that I've surpassed that by much, but I've opened accounts, closed accounts... Like most average non smart people do. Believe it or not, there was a time I did not know it's better to sock drawer and keep accounts open.
Long story short... I see some aged closed accounts creeping towards that 10 year mark. Normally I would judge things off of the closed date, so I do not have to think much about it. However, the next ones to fall off have a Status Updated date.
5/3 Bank
Opened: 2006.01 (16 years 3 months)
Closed: 2007.01
Last Reported: 2013.11 (8 years 5 months)
Syncb/Walmart
Opened: 2013.07 (8 years 8 months)
Closed: 2013.12
Status Updated: 2016.02 (6 years 2 months)
Is it safe to assume these will remain till the Status Update reaches that 10 year mark?
No, there's nothing written in stone about 10 years. Closed accounts can drop off sooner than that, or later than that.
Or should I be more concerned because once these fall off my AAoA will drop drastically?
Why be concerned? There's nothing you can do about it.
Syncb/Walmart
Opened: 2016.10 (5 years 6 months)
Closed: 2018.10
Status Updated: 2019.02 (3 years 2 months)
CommenityBank/Wayfair
Opened: 2016.11 (5 years 5 months)
Closed: 2019.08
Status Updated: 2019.08 (2 years 8 months)
How screwed am I?
No one can say. Yes you will probably lose some points. But you will regain them with the passage of time.
The 5/3 is my anchor right now but once that's gone I'm going to be losing a lot of years. Is the Walmart that's behind it going to catch it and lessen the impact?
No.
Would it be possible to call 5/3 and ask them to look into my old account for (make up a reason) and somehow get them to renew my Status Updated date?
No.
...and I still say that you're too worried. 
As mentioned above, you might lose some points, but it shouldn't be catastrophic... and they'll return with time.
FWIW, my late MIL had a 20 year old, long closed JCPenny card still showing as open and active on her credit reports... they'll drop off when they do.