It happens. I feel that way at times. About a year ago I left my job of 16 years because of the mental and emotional abuse. I couldn't take it anymore. One day I just took a job with a little over 33% pay cut and left. It's been very difficult but thankfully I have friends I was able to lean on. Went from only a car payment and 60k sitting across a few accounts to broke and ran up credit cards as I had to adjust my cost of living. At times I wondered if I made a mistake as it appeared that I merely traded one set of problems for another.
A year later and my pay is back to what it was during the pandemic. Next year I should be making what I was when I left my old job. I'm no longer in the hole as of this month, but now I'm paying down the debt and have to rebuild my savings. All while life keeps kicking me when I'm down. There have definitely been times where I wanted to just give up, but I spent 5 years rebuilding and don't want that going down the drain.
At this point, I'm just trying to control what I can and focus on one thing at a time. I suggest you do the same. Its helped my mental health greatly.
My job matches 4% so I lowered it to 4% from 10 til I pay off my cards
@Fester82 - thanks for this posting. Based on the responses, it's clear that you're in the same boat as many of us. Some are on the other side, but they're here to offer support.
I hope you get additional practical tips to help you.
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@Fester82 wrote:My job matches 4% so I lowered it to 4% from 10 til I pay off my cards
Honestly, I stopped contributing for now. While tax free and free money from employer, it does me absolutely nothing for the next 20 years and it's an additional 160 a month I can use to pay down bills. My current priority is survival and that requires me to pay things down quick.
I hear you, as i am in the same boat. The total Cards did their job. But They will be the 1st 2 cards I pay off, and even if it hurts my score, it wont be perm. As I will also cut the cards that have a minimum payment that acts like total. Where the card could be paid off and the payment would still be $41.00. All those types of cards will be on the chopping block.
@Brian_Earl_Spilner wrote:
@Fester82 wrote:My job matches 4% so I lowered it to 4% from 10 til I pay off my cards
Honestly, I stopped contributing for now. While tax free and free money from employer, it does me absolutely nothing for the next 20 years and it's an additional 160 a month I can use to pay down bills. My current priority is survival and that requires me to pay things down quick.
I had to drop down to 3% at one time, and that was a tough pill to swallow. But getting right with creditors takes priority. The good thing about my match was that we're matched at 4% for our 3% allotment. We only get an additional 1/2% for 4 and 5%, so I was only leaving 1% on the table. But you've got to do what you've got to do.
@LakeLife wrote:
so I was only leaving 1% on the table. But you've got to do what you've got to do.
Yeah the whole "leaving money on the table" thing is something I absolutely refuse to do.
I changed jobs 18 months ago... the new job is 5 mile from home with better pay than I had on my previous job that was 25 miles from home.
A while back the old job called me up and said "hey, would you like to make some money on the side?" I'm like "sure.. you can match what I'm making on the new job." They agreed... and I'm working on the side at my old job. Some weeks are 10-12 hours... some are 40 hrs... on top of the 40 I'm doing on my new job.
It's doable because I do CNC machining where I set it up and babysit the machine for hours and hours. I was given the OK to sleep... so I do when I'm working nights after working all day.
It's $6-8k a month on the side... and no way do I leave that on the table because if I don't take it someone else will in this economy. 
