Marriage and Debt!

[Anonymous]

But where is the debt? $5,000 in CCs? The student loan is a deferred loan. As far as the $5k in cc debt, she might have to work a few more hours. The student loan is an investment in her future and she should have years to pay it off. With her degree she should be able to get a better paying job to cover living expenses and make installment payments on her student loans... She just needs to make sure that CC debt starts getting smaller. I am concerned how easy she can just say maybe she should walk away from her debt. Where is the responsibility in that...

Please if there is a VERY BAD financial situation that we don't know of please explain. Is her credit a mess with collections and chargeoffs? What is her credit score? Is there other reasons why she would consider BK? Thats a serious statement. She couldn't just want to declare BK over her $5k can she? How bad is the current financial situation?

Besides all that. If the two of you are planning on a family and she is now going to give up her career that she was in college for, then YES I feel her debt may become both of your responsibility. Because in this case if she is going to be a stay at home mom she is giving up her income and that is a decision you both need to discuss.

Still, there needs to be other reason to declare bk... very serious...

Message Edited by ilovepizza on 05-03-2008 12:21 PM

[haulingthescoreup]

I agree with pizza. I'm sure she's a wonderful person in other ways, but that's an awfully nonchalant attitude toward money that SHE borrowed, and the SHE promised to pay.

Bankruptcy is meant for disasters: medical crises, destroyed marriages, job losses and so forth. And of course, as others pointed out, SL's can't be included anyway.

I'm sorry, because I guess this sounds harsh, and I don't mean to be. But I find it scary when people don't think it's important to keep their promises. Maybe she needs to read this whole thread to understand that her views about repaying debt are very, very different from those of others.


edited because it felt like I was piling on. But this is so disturbing to me.

Message Edited by haulingthescoreup on 05-03-2008 01:49 PM

[Anonymous]

I"d just like to reagree with Pizza.

I personally don't see Student Loans as some horrible debt, they are for your good, not money you borrow to go drink beer and buy new clothes.

As for 5k in credit card debt that is easily paid down over time, probably less than a year if all things go the right way.

[dr0265]

I sure hope the poor woman does not read this thread....

Mike said, "If the ugliness of a BK on her is the answer to that then she was willing to go with it."  Note that it was not something she wanted to do, just something she was WILLING to do if it was in the best interest of their future financial standing.   They decided that THEY wanted to have children sooner than later and that she would PROBABLY stay home.  Seems this poor woman is being found guilty of a lack of financial integrity before all information is read or known. 

[Anonymous]

$40K in CC debt @ CC interest rates with no assets to show for is BAD DEBT.

$35K in student loans is not bad. First thing like interest is 4%-6% depending on when she went to school. Second it is TAX DEDUCTIBLE. So if you are in the 25% braket you "get back" 1/4 of the interest you pay. This makes the effective interest rate more like 3%-4%.

I would recommend have you and future wife work out a plan to payoff the CC debt and she will need to learn to live within budget to avoid relying on the plastic.

There is no reason to pay student loans off early. Make payments on time and in full. Invest any extra money. Since after tax rate on student loans is 3%-4% is you have a higher return in investments it helps your net worth more to invest instead of paying down the debt.

[dragnldy]

Mike, get her working to pay it off before you have kids.  Something else you need to think hard about is what would happen should something go really wrong with the kids.  I spent a month out of work for my daughter when she was hospitalized for being severely bitten in the face by a dog.  My nephew spent 3 weeks in an out of state infant ICU because of a staph infection that got into his bones when he was 2 weeks old.  My sister and BIL were running back and forth to Colorado every week to get him check-ups for months afterwards which caused a huge loss of income for both of them.  Anything could happen to derail your finances especially when you have kids.  Get what you can taken care of first financially.

[marty56]

Dont make her an AU, check account or joint user on any account.  Keeep you credit and money totaly serperate.

Fair or not, money/credit management is one of the major causes of why people get divorced or end relationships.

[Anonymous]

Yea, we had already agreed on keeping separate accounts with me paying the bills, etc.

[Anonymous]

I completely agree. Anything can happen and I'd much rather have that "buffer" of income (that would otherwise be spent on the debt) while kids are involved. I think the best thing right now is to have two incomes before we have kids.

Thanks,

Mike

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dragnldy wrote:

Mike, get her working to pay it off before you have kids.  Something else you need to think hard about is what would happen should something go really wrong with the kids.  I spent a month out of work for my daughter when she was hospitalized for being severely bitten in the face by a dog.  My nephew spent 3 weeks in an out of state infant ICU because of a staph infection that got into his bones when he was 2 weeks old.  My sister and BIL were running back and forth to Colorado every week to get him check-ups for months afterwards which caused a huge loss of income for both of them.  Anything could happen to derail your finances especially when you have kids.  Get what you can taken care of first financially.

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